Sunday, March 13, 2011

Comic 872: Grimm's Calculus

fairy tales

[Comic title: Fairy Tales; alt text: Goldilocks' discovery of Newton's method for approximation required surprisingly few changes.]

As you all know, Randy is particularly fond of correcting errors in his comics without so much as a comment noting his previous error. This extends to adding a "Zing!" to the end of alt texts which are widely seen as being unnecessarily elitist, though not, apparently, to adding Hey Jude to his shitty chart comics about Hey Jude.

I've always roundly mocked Randy for this tendency before, because it's funny, and other webcomics people who occasionally upload errors usually acknowledge them somewhere, even if it's just on their Twitter streams. But I've never felt that it was really that significant before. It's just a minor, stupid thing.

Then came today's comic.

The image above is a copy of the original comic. Reproduced below is the corrected version.

corrected comic

What the fuck, Randy? I mean, I know you don't bother proofreading, but do you not even fucking look at your comics before uploading them? Just a fleeting glance should have told you something was hideously wrong here. But you don't even have time to do that?

But notice that the blocking of the text is different. It almost looks like this was a deliberate stylistic decision--it's hard to imagine how he could make an error of something so colossally stupid. See how the "Dammit" moves, for instance. Was this deliberate?

Not much to say about the comic itself. No doubt in response to assertions that Megan of the Bountiful Milk is always used as an insert to be the voice of truth and perfection, here she is doing something which is moderately unreasonable, but in a way that is delightfully quirky (and, no doubt, utterly arousing to one such as Randy, Math Enthusiast).

This comic might have had merit if the joke weren't merely Randy taking random words from fairy tales and replacing them with random terms from mathematics, and then providing a narrative for why this is happening. Wasn't there a time when there was intelligence to your jokes, Randy? Not just LOLRANDOM juxtapositions that have no reason to be juxtaposed?

173 comments:

  1. First!

    And nice crit, this time!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Exposition. He has an idea for a comic, perhaps a *good* idea this time, and the means to convey it is fucking exposition. There is, quite literally, no lazier way of explaining something. Seriously Randall, you are a poor excuse for a human being.

    Captcha: Dedliest. So close.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Are people ever going to catch on and realize that this shit is retarded? Randall's been at an all-time low in the past few months and keeps managing to make a new "Worst XKCD Strip Ever."

    ReplyDelete
  4. Nah, he definitely has gone way lower than this. This is just garden-variety reference cheese. To get really bad, we need to go back to the milk.

    Oh yes, 858, I am talking about you.

    Although 859 is pretty catastrophic too.

    ReplyDelete
  5. "This comic might have had merit if the joke weren't merely Randy taking random words from fairy tales and replacing them with random terms from mathematics, and then providing a narrative for why this is happening."

    Oho, so you mean a joke with some actual structure to it?

    The main problem with this comic is it doesn't provide anything witty. Math terms + Fairy Tales =/= a joke.

    What needs to happen is something... well, funny? I enjoyed http://xkcd.com/821/ "119 little pigs," because the notion of the little pigs building their houses out of base elements was funny! That comic could use the imagination for it's portrayal. (Not as effective as blown-out cartoon visuals)

    Here, what the hell? No imagery to speak of, we're left with WORDS WORDS NUMBERS AND MORE WORDS. He wouldn't, and I doubt could, show us (n-1) dwarves, or any of his other images.

    ReplyDelete
  6. this was just random mathematical concept-dropping

    we get it randall, you went to college. Hooray for you.

    ReplyDelete
  7. He proved early on that he has a very poor grasp of quality absurdity. It's amazing that he keeps trying, or perhaps it's more amazing that he doesn't at least improve through trying.

    http://xkcd.com/16/

    ReplyDelete
  8. who in the fucking fuck has ever, ever written

    lim x
    x-->oo

    who

    jesus fuck

    ReplyDelete
  9. @Chiggy Chugga:
    Correct me if I'm wrong, but if that's meant to be an infinity sign, isn't that the standard notation for writing a limit?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Wait a sec, my bad. To say "limit of x as x approaches infinity" is effectively saying "infinity."

    The only real purpose is if you were, I guess, deriving something and it came down to just an "x"

    ReplyDelete
  11. XKCD #873:

    Harry Potter and the Sine Wave

    Harry: Expelliarmus!
    StickRandall: No! You can never disarm me of my maths that I know! That cannot be removed from my sphere of things I know about!
    [StickRandall blasts Harry with a sine wave]

    can i haz money plz

    ReplyDelete
  12. Do you think Randall drinks fine Scotch, or is he more of a cheap vodka sort of guy? I personally think he's the type of person who can't handle his liquor at all and passes out at the mere scent of freshly baked bread.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Randy seems like the type of guy who can't tell the difference between different beverages, but avoids the cheap ones and drinks the mid-range liquor and microbrews with an interesting name.

    ReplyDelete
  14. @TheMesosade
    The only real purpose is if you were, I guess, deriving something and it came down to just an "x"

    that's the only way i can see it coming up, but then again it would only come up on a calculus midterm, not in the "work of a mathematics professor"...

    "I guess the א_ω little piggies did get a bit weird towards the end..." would have been a funnier line because א_ω does get weird towards the end in some sense (it is a singular cardinal, which is unusual).

    as always, if you're going to use a word outside its context, it's only funny if it finds new, unexpected meaning. LOLRANDOM is... retarded.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Haha, Randull is so randumb. Monty Python has nothing on this legend of the comedic arts.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I believe that I have 24 comics left now, Capn.

    http://capnsblag.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  17. The subject of the comic is stupid. Why am I surprised?

    Randall relies so heavily in just dropping mathematical references to amuse his fanbase that he forgets to have them make any sense.

    "Inductive White and the (n-1) dwarves": proving that the proposition is true for n-1 is the middle step of induction. It should be called "Inductive White and the n dwarves", or "Inductive White and the dwarf", since that's where it starts(usually; could be no dwarf, maybe). It makes little to no sense as the story would have to be retold to prove that... I don't even want to continue this. It makes no sense.

    "lim x Little Pigs": that obviously tends to inifnity. This means the story just gets bigger and bigger and never reaches an end towards which it can get weird.

    Finally: "I'm still not sure which versions are real". Um... Megan? Are you actually retarded?

    I think Rob's decision to focus on the first panel blunder was wise, since otherwise this is another "LOL RANDOM MATH" comic. Ironically, it reads like Hollywood science, only dropping names with no meaning. You know, the kind of thing Randall supposedly HATES.

    ReplyDelete
  18. So, did Rob just lose his job or something? Because suddenly the reviews are timely and review-y.

    And: the alt-text proves once again that Randall has only the most basic grasp of mathematics.

    ReplyDelete
  19. So, did Rob just lose his job or something? Because suddenly the reviews are timely and review-y.

    I think it's a combination of Randall being decidedly awful recently and new competition from xkcd sucks reboot.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I think it's because Rob's turned into a trigonometric function (specifically a cosine) which doens't allow him to climb up Rapunzel's hair. Which would also explain why his reviews are so up and down.

    Maths AND fairytales? Man, I am SO on form.

    ReplyDelete
  21. But apparently not on form enough to spell 'donuts' properly. Or are you actually so retarded that you were trying to spell 'doesn't'?

    ReplyDelete
  22. Oh man, zing! You swapped two letters, you functional illiterate!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Rob, your mimicking site has once again devoured my insightful prose!

    I posted an attempt at XKCD apologetics, but it vanished. So here it is, where your great hungering maw cannot reach.

    Bottom line: The original comic is actually true to original geek-emo XKCD standards, and the edit is him ret-conning it to match his current style and be less depressing [to him].

    Captcha: Antedir.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Project much, anon944? Don't worry, somewhere out there is somebody that will grudgingly accept you for who you are.

    ReplyDelete
  25. lol ravenz butthurt

    ReplyDelete
  26. Noone is a pretty cool guy, eh always cares and doesn't afraid of anything.

    ReplyDelete
  27. How many female math professors are there, anyway?

    White knighting again, Randy?

    ReplyDelete
  28. "I think it's a combination of Randall being decidedly awful recently and new competition from xkcd sucks reboot. "

    mostly it's Randy being awful lately. I can assure you, "competition" is not going to encourage me to write real reviews.

    ReplyDelete
  29. @Anon1237: At a quick count [not checking my records for forgotten courses] I've had 2 female math professors [Calc II and Probability I] and 6 male... but I'm a math minor, so maybe more advanced math courses have a better ratio?

    Although, if we're assuming the High School Audience Theory, I had 4 [grade 10/11/12] math courses with female teachers, and only 1 [grade 9] with a male teacher. GOOMH RANDALL, or something.

    Re Competition: Rob is like Walmart; he is too large to worry about competition. Also this site has more viewers.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Algebra, trig, all three calculus classes (calculi?), differential equations, probability and statistics, discrete, and linear algebra all had female teachers for me. But to be fair, half of them looked like men.

    Captcha: rhylota. May cause acne, rash, internal bleeding, external bleeding, excessive pregnancy, tendency to die without warning, Armageddon, alien invasion, spontaneous combustion, and festering pus. Ask your doctor if it's safe to use Rhylota.

    ReplyDelete
  31. I'm really aroused but I don't have any arms. will someone masturbate for me

    captcha: caliesec. may cause 12 hour long erection and unstoppable orgasms. ask your priest if it's okay to take caliesec

    ReplyDelete
  32. @Ravenzomg

    In high school, I had 2 female math teachers and 1 male math teacher spread out over 4 classes. In college, I had 6 males and 2 females for 11 classes (I was a math minor too).

    So, I guess Randy's not really white knighting, as long as we assume that his target audience is high schoolers.

    ReplyDelete
  33. I can surely count at least 3 female Math professors during my Comp Sci graduation(the system down here doesn't work in "major" and "minor", so that's all I can say), and 5 male. I think it's a reasonable ratio.

    I don't see how Randall including a female Math teacher is white-knighting. Seriously, people, tone down.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Mole is from way down under

    ReplyDelete
  35. Woo! People talking about me! That is all I ever wanted out of life. It is true though, I am but a leech on Rob's planetoid-sized ass.

    Captcha: Dental. Did you hear about the Buddhist monk who refused Novocain during a root canal? He wanted to transcend dental medication.

    ReplyDelete
  36. ...

    You guys know you can't generalize from your experience to all math professors, right? You know that professor != high school teacher, right?

    Please don't make Randall sound like the smart one.

    ReplyDelete
  37. @Anon310: We know he said "professor", but since Randall's target audience seems to be Highschoolers, we're assuming by "professor" he actually meant "High school teacher".

    Also, if we were good at words we'd write comics like Randall, instead of bitching about his. No comics ---> not good at words [I'm whatting the antecedent?]. Seems pretty cut and dry to me, boss.

    ReplyDelete
  38. true fact: i read through the beginning of this post, couldn't tell what had been changed, and figured Rob was making some comedy out of exaggerating his anger at some incredibly minor change between the original and fixed versions of the comic. I switched back and forth between the two versions about a dozen times without noticing anything different.

    I...I am out of practice.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Oh my gosh. I didn't even pay attention to the breast-milk joke earlier in 821 (left panel)

    http://xkcd.com/821/

    I guess Randy has been trying to deal with this problem for a long time

    ReplyDelete
  40. It is okay, Carl, it is just a sign that you need to start posting more. =D

    Captcha: nesses. Third time I've gotten it -- no joke.

    ReplyDelete
  41. The unfortunate part is that his alt-text joke would have been a math-fairy tale union that made sense. The comic itself is shit, but I did chuckle at the alt-text.

    ReplyDelete
  42. oh sweetness this is what i would do if i was a server

    http://www.goatkcd.com/869/

    ReplyDelete
  43. Seven a.m., waking up in the morning
    Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs
    Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal
    Seein’ everything, the time is goin’
    Tickin’ on and on, everybody’s rushin’
    Gotta get down to the bus stop
    Gotta catch my bus, I see my friends (My friends)

    Captcha: mocks. Yep.

    ReplyDelete
  44. @ Partyin', partyin' (Yeah)- What the hell was that? I guess she's so bored that she has to monotonously repeat "fun fun fun fun" to herself in an effort to get the idea to penetrate her subconscious. Can't blame her either. If I spent my weekends like that I'd be looking forward to Mondays.

    Still, looks like she's just a kid so it's all good. She'll learn to enjoy herself when she grows up.

    ReplyDelete
  45. RandalMunroeForgotTheLinesMarch 15, 2011 at 3:08 AM

    RANDALL MUNROE FORGOT THE LINES!!!!!
    HE FORGOT THE LINES CONNECTING THE TEXT TO THE PERSON SPEAKING!!!
    HE
    FORGOT
    THE
    LINES!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  46. "....LOLRANDOM juxtapositions that have no reason to be juxtaposed?...."

    Since when can juxtaposing juxtapositions ever be the result of reason?
    Not altogether different from pixelating pixilations though I reckon.

    Innit?

    ReplyDelete
  47. Your mom and I juxtaposed last night.

    Okay, I'll stop now.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Get tested Cameron.
    Especially for all manner of Saprobic bacteria and assorted other heteroptrophs - me Mam harbours a plethora of the horrid little beasties.

    Innit?

    ReplyDelete
  49. It's true. I'm the who gave it to her.

    ReplyDelete
  50. I know there's another xkcd comic coming tomorrow, but I'm really excited for Friday's!
    Friday, friday
    Gotta get down to the xkcd site, to see the comic
    Because its Friday, Friday frrriiiiddaaayyyy

    ReplyDelete
  51. Nothing wrong with that.

    Captcha: migrott
    How appropriate.

    ReplyDelete
  52. Agreed, but it does get dead boring after a short period of time.
    At least it isn't relatively boring like incest.

    Innit?

    ReplyDelete
  53. Hey, guys, go take a look at xkcdsw.com

    It kind of puts stuff into perspective.

    ReplyDelete
  54. screw you Mikey xkcdsw is AWESOME

    ReplyDelete
  55. dude, xkcdsw is WAY better than xkcd

    ReplyDelete
  56. Randall hilarity watch 873:
    Yeah, it's kinda entertaining. And it's formatted correctly, with a premise, the caption making a funny, and the alt-text giving a cheap add-on joke.

    Go, Randall, go.

    Captcha: colen. ew.

    ReplyDelete
  57. I mean, Austin Powers did this joke about a decade ago, and the caption is a little redundant, but let's give Randy some credit for a decently-executed comic.

    Unfortunately this means that Rob will take 48 hours to get to posting his Megdall fanfic. Oh well...

    ReplyDelete
  58. I haven't been made so uncomfortable by an FPS since I played "No Russian" and the entirety of Homefront back to back.

    Actually, honestly, considering Modern Warfare 2 and Homefront, it seems like Randall might have been better off making a crack at how bathetic modern FPSes end up being. He could have done the whole "everyone you kill has a bio snippet you listen to" as an exaggerated parody of the attempted pathos devs sprinkle into their games. Instead, he seems to be making a joke that relies on people and developers trending toward less pathos and melodrama in shooters. Which, despite games like Bulletstorm, Duke Nukem Forever, and Serious Sam 3, doesn't really seem to be the case.

    ReplyDelete
  59. I just have one question WHAT IS THAT STICK FIGURE DOING WITH HIS HANDS.

    ReplyDelete
  60. WebCite of 873.

    http://www.webcitation.org/5xDguyPVR

    I know there's no glaring mistake in this comic, but I'll start doing this regularly. Just to build up an unedited archive of xkcd.

    ReplyDelete
  61. yes, it is a good habit to make. may I suggest making it a blog or website somewhere, so they're easier to keep track of?

    ReplyDelete
  62. Damn, I was expecting a "nuclear"/"nucular" comic. Maybe in a few month's time.

    ReplyDelete
  63. A blog, eh? Perhaps something along the lines of http://xkcdwebcited.blogspot.com?

    Should make it easier to keep track of Randy's cute little mistakes.

    ReplyDelete
  64. grood, grood. I'll try to remember to link you when i write the next post

    ReplyDelete
  65. That... I think that mod idea is actually kind of good. It isn't a funny idea at all, but it sounds like it would be a fun addition that would simply start to wear a bit thin once the backstories start repeating themselves.

    I have no idea why anybody would freak out about it. It's such a stupid thought that it's amazing anybody would try to hinge a joke on such a presupposition, even hyperbolically. Fiction doesn't stop being fiction just because it is supplemented with words.

    ReplyDelete
  66. xkcdsw is frequently better than xkcd, but most of the time the humour is derived from parodying past comics. It wouldn't be anywhere near as amusing if xkcd didn't exist.

    Which makes one wonder: does xkcdsw justify xkcd's existence, or does xkcd justify xkcdsw's existence?

    ReplyDelete
  67. 873:

    http://www.reddit.com/r/gaming/comments/g4wrr/xkcd_fps_mod/c1kxuql

    ReplyDelete
  68. Not to mention that this is shit games already do. Intentionally. And people like them.

    Hell, even Red Dawn did this.

    captcha: Balmsome, an awesome balm

    ReplyDelete
  69. Reviewing xkcd even when Rob gets bored:

    http://capnsblag.blogspot.com/

    Or you can wait here for the inevitable Megan fanfic. I know I am.

    ReplyDelete
  70. Randall's bane: execution. He ALWAYS chooses the worst execution possible for his jokes. Yes, this idea is old and used a lot, but heck, it could be done well.

    Then Randall decides to show us a stick figure playing a game instead of showing us THE GODDAMN GAME. That's like broadcasting a major sports event and all the time all you see is the audience cheering or mourning or fighting as the game goes on.

    Also, his head is split open. Really, Randall? I could stick my arm into his brain there. This is ridiculous.

    ReplyDelete
  71. The worst part of the new comic is that it fucking says "FPS Mod." Really, Randall? You couldn't name a single FPS? Are you worried about copyright infringement, or dating yourself, you fuck?

    ReplyDelete
  72. Mole, remember, it could have been worse.

    The caption could have been on top.

    ReplyDelete
  73. Reboot does a Redux countdown: 23

    (Thanks for covering for me kitten)

    ReplyDelete
  74. I may have to change my name. It feels like an endearment when people call me 'kitten'.

    ReplyDelete
  75. No, seriously, guys.

    Is it like, a mouse, or a joystick, or is he wringing his hands, or shaking a cracked egg or setting the time on a clock or WHAT.

    WHAT THAT STICK FIGURE DOING.

    ReplyDelete
  76. Well, obviously it isn't a mouse, you can't use a mouse if not on a table. Nor you shake a mouse.

    So at least we know what it ISN'T.

    ReplyDelete
  77. It's a vibrating xbox controller. You can tell by the carefully drawn battery pack on the back.

    ReplyDelete
  78. Guys, don't bash xkcdsw. I'm pretty sure the forumites (fora-ites?) *know* when they're making it better. This one - http://xkcdsw.com/3119 - for instance, is a huge improvement.

    ReplyDelete
  79. Dude Kitten, stop spamming your fucking shitblog here. No one gives two shits besides you and maybe two other people and certainly no one gives two shits about your reviewing capabilities since the only reason people congregate here is because of common hatred stemming from the comments you fuck.

    ReplyDelete
  80. cunt-blogging ass-flogging fuck shit blag fart-fuck

    ReplyDelete
  81. Two weeks! Two weeks I've waited for my first proper hater, and then they go and post here! And they call me 'Dude Kitten'!

    12:29 - Could you go and write that on my blog?

    http://capnsblag.blogspot.com/

    It might be worth changing 'Dude Kitten' to some form of kitten-based insult as well. It detracts from the feel of the post.

    ReplyDelete
  82. I'll call you whatever the hell I feel like, kitten bro.

    ReplyDelete
  83. Hey, kitten-fucker, fuck off.

    ReplyDelete
  84. That was too far, scott. How dare you.

    ReplyDelete
  85. Is Rob still fat?

    ReplyDelete
  86. UndercoverCuddlefishMarch 16, 2011 at 5:53 PM

    is the ocean still damp

    captcha: ousting

    ReplyDelete
  87. Please stop posting

    ReplyDelete
  88. Randall posts an objectively okay/good comic --> we devolve into a series of cannibalistic internet memes.

    IT'S SCIENCE, PEOPLE.

    ReplyDelete
  89. It hasn't really been done in multiplayer FPS games, except perhaps for the class backgrounds in Team Fortress 2, and I took it for granted that he meant multiplayer. Maybe he didn't, but if he did then I guess Halo is the only FPS he has ever played because overhearing snippets of conversation has been a staple feature in FPS games with human opponents for a very long time.

    ReplyDelete
  90. I'm not sure it is multiplayer. At least in single player there are characters you're taking out - who would be moved by this in multiplayer when you are just shooting an obvious avatar of a (not dying) person who will indeed be back two minutes after you shoot him?

    "No, I didn't just kill someone with three kids waiting for him back home, I just killed XxBummyBoy604xX."

    ReplyDelete
  91. Personally I think the first two bios in the comic are retarded and don't really make you feel sympathetic for the person or whatever that the player killed. Like super retarded. Could have made some better bios to get the point across.

    ReplyDelete
  92. 5:20, are you telling me you aren't TOTALLY DEVASTATED by killing a one-time treehouse builder? I mean, he once built a friggin' treehouse!

    And that woman had so many unread e-mails. I'm sure each one was incredibly important and worth her time. Not sure why she'd let so many important e-mails stack up like that without checking them though. She was kind of flighty...

    But, man, that treehouse! That treehouse.

    ReplyDelete
  93. Abtruse Goose is reminiscing about a time of the Internet that I doubt he was actually old enough to be around for, let alone have had access.

    ReplyDelete
  94. Yeah unless Abtruse Goose guy is like in his late 30's (which would make this thing sad on another level) I kinda doubt he really had that experience.

    ReplyDelete
  95. Well maybe not late thirties but AT LEAST 30(which is still pretty sad).

    ReplyDelete
  96. At one extreme, he was actually in or possibly graduated from college when Eternal September started, making him roughly 40, which makes the fact that he's trying to establish some kind of camaraderie with angsty highschoolers really sad and kind of creepy. At the other extreme, he actually is an angsty highschooler, meaning he can't remember when Eternal September started and is either grossly exaggerating or outright lying about his experience to establish camaraderie with aging nerds. Every point in between has both, to differing degrees.

    ReplyDelete
  97. Abstruse Goose -- actually just trolling everyone. Occam's Razor, guys.

    ReplyDelete
  98. Occam's Razor: "I can write my argument and your argument such that my argument contains less words therefore I am right".

    ReplyDelete
  99. (Not to say Occam's Razor isn't a legitimately useful heuristic but Internet Occam's Razor is just as dumb and pointless as Internet ad hominem.)

    ReplyDelete
  100. Occam's Razor. Abstruse Goose is awful, no one seems to like it, but everyone keeps going and saying how awful it still is. Conclusion: It is supposed to be awful.

    Seriously, point out someone who is an Abstruse Goose fan, but until then I'm convinced it's XKCD meets Electric Retard.

    ReplyDelete
  101. Abstruse Goose FanMarch 17, 2011 at 12:04 PM

    I am an Abstruse Goose fan.

    ReplyDelete
  102. I've never bothered with Abtruse Goose before, so I thought I'd try it out. I failed to get past the first comic.

    "I'm always alone, so why am I never lonely?"

    Ugh.

    ReplyDelete
  103. I have finally found it: the holy grail of shit math webcomics. Worse than xkcd, worse than even abstruse goose. It is Spiked Math. Check these out... if you dare:
    http://spikedmath.com/389.html (this one is probably worse than any xkcd that isn't about brackets
    http://spikedmath.com/394.html
    http://spikedmath.com/395.html (TWO KRAMER COMICS)
    (IN A ROW)
    http://spikedmath.com/397.html (penis. haha, penis)
    http://spikedmath.com/399.html

    ReplyDelete
  104. let's be honest 1.32 is probably spikedmath's author looking to drum up publicity

    ReplyDelete
  105. He has a ranking of best math webcomics. AND HE IS IN THIRD PLACE.

    Given the post is anonymous, it is indeed possible. Still... it is really is THAT bad.

    ReplyDelete
  106. Well, if we're going to dig through the trash:

    http://www.tristanworld.com/fractal_man.htm
    http://www.tristanworld.com/prime_base.htm

    ReplyDelete
  107. I call parody. Surely. Surely. Please.

    ReplyDelete
  108. Does your shit math webcomic update -12e^(i*pi) times a month, Kitten?
    DIDNT THINK SO

    ReplyDelete
  109. http://www.tristanworld.com/oxymoron.htm

    Does your shit maths webcomic have anything that compares to that strip, 2:58?
    OH SNAP I GUESS IT DOESN'T

    Seriously, what the fuck is going on there? A witch with an IQ of pi is an oxymoron...?

    ReplyDelete
  110. u just dont get it

    ReplyDelete
  111. Oh God, an oxidised moron = oxymoron?

    I'm gonna go and cleanse my brain now.

    Captcha: Cokeryo. How very, very appropriate.

    ReplyDelete
  112. jesus cocksucking christ

    abstruse goose manages to be WORSE than xkcd. you can rant about randy's white-knighting and you'll be right most of the time, but he's never done anything like this:

    http://abstrusegoose.com/12

    go on, read it. do you think that's sexist? abtruse goose routinely presents women in a purely sexual role. seriously, read it now, and tell me if you think it's sexist.

    now, having read it, read it again with the following knowledge: WALTER RUDIN'S WIFE, MARY ELLEN RUDIN, WAS A BETTER RESEARCH MATHEMATICIAN THAN HE.

    fuck that comic pisses me off.

    ReplyDelete
  113. So? It doesn't mean she didn't want to have sex sometimes.

    ReplyDelete
  114. Seriously, I can't tell this place apart from 4chan anymore. Great going guys.

    Well, okay, maybe the grammar is a little better.

    Captcha: Talliest. My comment features no joke, just exposition. Exactly like Randall's latest comic.

    ReplyDelete
  115. Lulz! It's funny because the schedule is vague and noncommittal.

    Pro tip: Anyone's attempt at humor can be easily degraded by responding in the form of "It's funny because (fundamental idea of the joke)."

    ReplyDelete
  116. So, there's a new comic up.
    I'd think that Randall had posted his schedule but there's no way he gets up at 7.

    Also, I'm a fan of Square Root of Minus Garfield. Discuss.

    (CAPTCHA: fiblet. A small fib.)

    ReplyDelete
  117. The alt-text for the new comic interests me. Given the enthusiasm he puts into his work, it's apparent that Randall is not excited at all about doing the thing he is successful at. Yet I don't think he was ever excited about or expectant of being successful at it- it seems like he was just lazily dropping rubbish on the web for the hell of it and somehow picked up a following by some sinister quirk of faith.

    So how much can he trust himself?

    ReplyDelete
  118. for a second i thought the latest XKCD was going to be about the Left Behind books
    then i realized he just randomly bolded the phrase and it has nothing to do with them

    ReplyDelete
  119. "HONEY, LOOK WHAT I'M WEARING"

    ReplyDelete
  120. holy shit the latest one is terrible.

    he has obviously read the blurb of something like the seven habits of effective people on wiki, decided it was dumb because he doesn't know what the guy does outside of that book, and already the xkcd fans i see in real life are talking about how dumb it is to keep a set schedule.

    i really wish he was being self-aware with this but again he shows himself to be a pathetic shell of a man

    rob is fat

    ReplyDelete
  121. spiked math is Asperger's TERRIBLE

    "MAYBE IF I LIE TO HER THEN SHE WILL SEX ME HURR HURR HURR I DO NOT UNDERSTAND PAINTINGS ONLY MATHS"

    I mean fucking hell it's strawmen and bitter bullied jerk all over it whjat the hell FUCK YOU ALL.

    New XKCD isn't as flaming piss bad as it could have been but is still bad.

    Randall, somone who draws and updates about five minutes before schedule failing even to fucking look at his comics before he uploads them doesn't really have a leg to stand on w/ regards to productivity.

    and considering his preachy word-salad lecturey bullshit (I arm myself with the arrows of science against the rocks of ILLNESS) he doesn't really have much truck to be calling others out for their preachy bullshit either.

    ReplyDelete
  122. It's funny because if Randall really had a schedule and was excited about the thing he's successful at(successful, not good) he'd have enough buffer for an entire year of webcomics. If he died, we'd never know.

    That, and the comics would probably be better.

    ReplyDelete
  123. Dude Kitten wrote another review on his shitblog. What a fucker, eh?

    http://capnsblag.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  124. Thymine: I love you A
    Adenine: I love you too T
    Thymine: We were meant for each other (AUTHOR: GET IT CAUSE THEY'RE COMPLEMENTARY BASES)
    CAPTION: Unfortunately their relationship was only held together by weak hydrogen bonds (AUTHOR: THEY ARE HELD TOGETHER BY WEAK HYDROGEN BONDS)
    Helicase: I am a bitch and I will ruin your relationship
    (AUTHOR: WHICH ARE SEVERED BY DNA HELICASE)
    Alt-Text: Plenty more Thymine left in the sea

    guys could you help me make this worse

    ReplyDelete
  125. Thymine used to be a cute Uracil - untill she became a meth-head.

    ReplyDelete
  126. thanks for posting altf
    it's worse for being just above your name

    ReplyDelete
  127. Darling R?
    It is much better just above my person.

    ReplyDelete
  128. @Professional Mole Imagine if that did happen and we discovered that we had spent a year mocking a dead man's sexual fetishes.

    ReplyDelete
  129. A man who draws three stick figure comics a week (and badly at that) HAS THE FUCKING BALLS TO LECTURE ME ON PRODUCTIVITY?

    ReplyDelete
  130. RAEG!!!11

    Captcha: taters. Mmm. Taters.

    ReplyDelete
  131. Well yes, that's the point of this site (and Megan jokes)

    ReplyDelete
  132. I thought we were trying to get Rob to post nude pics of himself (and Raven).

    Captcha: comat. How your typical Youtube poster spells comet, coma, and combat

    ReplyDelete
  133. Rob has nude pics of himself and Raven?

    Artist's rendition:

    http://fc09.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2010/150/a/f/Chibi_Leia_and_Jabba_by_whithersoever.jpg

    And it's SFW, in case you were wondering.

    ReplyDelete
  134. Nude pics of Raven would be considered child pornography. It is obvious she is in the throes of her budding and downy Nabokovian peripubescence.

    Nude pics of Rob, though not technically child pornography, would certainly be afflictive and heartbreaking. It is obvious he is in the non-depilatory throes of his outré-hirsute Boullean postpubescence.

    Careful about that for which you strive.

    Innit?

    ReplyDelete
  135. Nude picture of Raven:

    http://tinyurl.com/6arefy3

    ReplyDelete
  136. write Let's order wrong words all the in

    think fun I be it'll

    ReplyDelete
  137. Hugine, Munin and Branwen are shy.

    Head shots are all you're gonna get.

    ReplyDelete
  138. You know I like it, do it sweetheart-- I'm the boss
    I'll let you get close to it
    I'm gonna make tonight a show
    Oh oh

    In other news, Randall heard our complaints about his graph comics, so he embedded his graph comic IN ANOTHER COMIC. My mind? Blown. Hard.

    I'll make your love grenade explode.... nanana

    ReplyDelete
  139. I like the newest xkcd actually. Sure, there might be all these hypocritical things behind it we can pick on Randall for in armchair psychology hour, but I think it does come off as humorously self-deprecating.

    That's all the praise Randall can get from me today, though. Check out this one from the forums:

    "Title text sets Randall into the top league of quotable personalities."

    bleh.

    ReplyDelete
  140. Could I get lurid stories about Frigg in addition to the headshots, though?

    ReplyDelete
  141. How 'bout a lurid narrative of the frolicsome jinks of Trig and his nephew Tripp?
    "Trisomy Trepidation Tales"

    Will that suffice?

    ReplyDelete
  142. "...but I think it does come off as humorously self-deprecating."

    More like self defecating, amirite?

    ReplyDelete
  143. I thought we had agreed the phrases "Randall Monroe" and "self-deprecation" weren't to be used in the same sentence, except with the words "is literally incapable of" between them.

    ...INB4 "self-deprecation is literally incapable of Randall Munroe"

    Ha ha. Very funny, you jokester you...

    ReplyDelete
  144. Randall Munroe is littorally incapable of self-deprecational jetsam.

    ReplyDelete
  145. So today, I was sitting on a particularly uncomfortable stool playing guitar. About 10 seconds after I stood up my cock went numb, like completely numb. I had to rub it for about 2 minutes before the feeling came back.

    Moral of the story: ALWAYS USE A CUSHION.

    ReplyDelete
  146. "Title text sets Randall into the top league of quotable personalities."

    Whoever said that is a stupid human being who a) doesn't recognize what makes a good quote and b) is apparently prone to juvenile hero worship of unaccomplished people.

    I hate you person who said that thing. I hate you.

    ReplyDelete
  147. "I hate you person who said that thing. I hate you."

    He goes by the name of 'headsign' in the forums, and he has posted 10 times in 2 years.

    Go, 9:51, go and show your hatred to him!

    ReplyDelete
  148. Looks like Rob could use

    ...

    a better schedule


    YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

    ReplyDelete
  149. Hey?
    What happened to the Berkman Blogger Common Team Survey comment?
    Did you take it down or did they?

    http://new.qualtrics.com/SE?Q_SS=beyBRnijpttxwH2_4Hp4lVv4k0EMdeI

    ReplyDelete
  150. I just hope the Coalition operation 'Odyssey Dawn' doesn't hurt any of my sisters in the Colonel's Elite Praetorian Guard.

    After all, they wear their Kalashnikovs like Gucci fashion accessories - that is just tres hawt!

    Innit?

    ReplyDelete
  151. IshowedUPafterCARLleftANDiWISHheDIDNTMarch 19, 2011 at 7:10 PM

    CONCERNING TIME MANAGEMENT: How long Randall spends on comics is debatable, but at least his comic updates without fail M/W/F. It could be a queue thing or whatever, but at least THAT is constant. You KNOW when you get up on Monday that there will be a stupid comic waiting to be ridiculed.

    Now Rob, is it too much for us to expect the same from you? Can't you ready a review by T/Th/Sa or at the least W/F/Su?

    Say what you will, xkcd did suck, and does, but lately xkcdsucks is sucking worse. Heck, if you like the comic you can say so. Carl would admit it if he couldn't find something wrong (or at least say "hey this one was ok except for..."). Can't you think of ANYTHING for these past two comics?

    ReplyDelete
  152. I'm busy.

    but i can get you a waaaamburger and some french cries if you like when i come back

    ReplyDelete
  153. Besides, I'm pretty sure part of why XKCD is so bad is BECAUSE Randall insists on updating M/W/F without fail, whether he has good material or not.

    ReplyDelete
  154. Rubbish. If he can't do a decent comic three days a week without fail, he needs to find another line of work.

    Then again, maybe I'll try that excuse. Maybe next time the foreman chews me out for a wall turning a little wonky I'll just say "but that's only because I insisted on working 50 hours a week without fail!" I'm sure he'll understand.

    ReplyDelete
  155. " Rubbish. If he can't do a decent comic three days a week without fail, he needs to find another line of work."

    that's what we've been saying since, like, 1992

    ReplyDelete
  156. IshowedUPafterCARLleft...serously, what the heck of a name is this?! I'll call yo Ishy.

    So, Ishy, I bet that if you're willing to pay monthly for Rob to post in xkcdsucks as much as Randall makes in a month, he'll gladly write funny and/or rageful reviews of xkcd in time! Heck, if you pay ME to do that, I'll take over this goddamn site in a jiff!

    Moral of the story: money, dear boy.

    Also, if I were you I'd give up on the waaaamburger and fries. Rob will obviously forget what he was doing with them and eat them before he comes back.

    ReplyDelete
  157. Also, this popped up in my twitter this morning. It's a graph about radiation, and I'm not sure whether it was done about now(i.e., it's hype fishing) or done long ago and unburied due to all the hype surrounding the tragic disaster in Japan.

    All I have to say about it now is: what the heck is that about bananas? Why is the scale so spastic?(the same sized square goes from 0.05 to 20, then suddenly 10000 and then 1000000; that's growing 400-fold, then 500-fold and finally 100-fold for no good reason) And did the smaller charts need to be so horribly tacked onto the bigger ones?

    That's all for now, if anyone needs me, I'll be back in my burrow.

    ReplyDelete
  158. Actually I liked Randy's radiation chart. Thought it helped to put things in perspective. The scale changes to show the vast differences in legal doses and actual doses brought up in the media lately.

    Then again, I have heard that the danger of radiation is more complex than just measurement in Sv (some isotopes are apparently more deadly than others).

    Also, it mentions Fukushima specifically, so it's pretty obvious that it was made recently.

    ReplyDelete
  159. @ThePirateKing: We're talking about Randall I-Don't-Get-'Redo's Patrick Munroe, here, so I mean, he could've tacked that on...

    ...If he hadn't been inspired by a reactor specialist who was taking time to answer questions about radioactivity recently. He did specify this on the blog, mind you, so it's not as if he plagiarized.

    ReplyDelete
  160. Wow. I'm no mathematician, so I had to think about them, but I got every one of those jokes.
    XKCD is kind of like a cryptic crossword puzzle, if you're not willing to put any thought into them, there's really no point in reading the comics at all.
    Oh, & the nitpicking about fixing the layout error in the first panel? - Lame as hell; it's bitching about the drawing equivalent of fixing a typo.

    ReplyDelete