Thursday, March 25, 2010
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"[a] vitriolic and bitter collection of unwarranted nastiness about a silly and harmless comic."
Welcome. This is a website called XKCD SUCKS which is about the webcomic xkcd and why we think it sucks. My name is Carl and I used to write about it all the time, then I stopped because I went insane, and now other people write about it all the time. I forget their names. The posts still seem to be coming regularly, but many of the structural elements - like all the stuff in this lefthand pane - are a bit outdated. What can I say? Insane, etc.
I started this site because it had been clear to me for a while that xkcd is no longer a great webcomic (though it once was). Alas, many of its fans are too caught up in the faux-nerd culture that xkcd is a part of, and can't bring themselves to admit that the comic, at this point, is terrible. While I still like a new comic on occasion, I feel that more and more of them need the Iron Finger of Mockery knowingly pointed at them. This used to be called "XKCD: Overrated", but then it fell from just being overrated to being just horrible. Thus, xkcd sucks.
Here is a comic about me that Ann made. It is my favorite thing in the world.
A+ work of art blog post
ReplyDeletefuck you rob
ReplyDeleterob you are so fat
ReplyDeleterob's blogs are so fat that they spill over into other blogs
ReplyDeleteyou fuck up
ReplyDelete[rob is fat joke]
ReplyDeletegreat job fucking things up, ROB
ReplyDeleteRob you faggot how can you even make fun of XKCD with a strait face when your writing is so terrible?
ReplyDeletemy face is more of a fjord than a strait
ReplyDeleteGreat derailing, attacking my spelling instead of even attempting to refute what I said. Not gonna work here, though. Unlike most of the people you talk to I actually recognize logical fallacies when I see them.
ReplyDeleteAnon you faggot how can you even make fun of Rob with a strait face when your spelling is so terrible?
ReplyDeletewell I just assumed that since I do not, in fact, make do much of anything with a straight face, you were calling my face a strait. and I am telling you that it is a fjord. do you dispute this?
ReplyDeleteWhat did I miss?
ReplyDeleteRob: so basically you're admitting that you're a hypocrite and could never make anything close to the level of talent that goes into the average XKCD?
ReplyDeletethat's exactly what he's admitting.
ReplyDeleteno, I'm saying that I find making fun of XKCD highly amusing. do you not understand what "with a straight face" means?
ReplyDelete(incidentally you should probably provide evidence that I'm a terrible writer, because I don't find your claims very compelling)
ReplyDeleterob's not fat, he's just so jammed full of dicks he bulges like a balloon
ReplyDeletetrufax
Rob's not fat, he's just heavily pregnant.
ReplyDeletewith giant mutant elephant fetuses
in every part of this body
that will one day burst out of him, Alien-style
trufax
Rob gave up on wearing belts years ago. His mom still calls him handsome.
ReplyDeleteRob's fingers are more dangerously cheesy than Cheetos.
Rob's fingers are more dangerously cheesy than Cheetos.
Rob brushes his teeth with lard.
Rob once tried to stimulate his anus with a carrot stick. He soon gave up and ate it with some ranch
Rob is the admin of Mcdonalds.
rob is the admin of gravity.
i was like, yo mamma is so fat. turned out yo mamma was rob
rob is so fat that when his thighs rub together it sparks and makes forest fires in australia
but hes so fat that he never moves enough for his thighs to rub together
but hes so fat that he never moves enough for his thighs to rub together. thats why australia still exists
HIS BELT IS THE EQUATOR
Rob doesn't care it's not butter
Rob has a high cholesterol and doesn't exercise on a regular basis.
rob has diabetes and an overactive thyroid
he has more chins than a chinese phonebook
when rob stood on the scales it said too be continued.
Rob is so fat, he eats lots.
rob is so fat he was baptized in Sea World.
rob is so fat, people jog around him for exercise.
rob is so fat he needs a VCR for a pager
rob is so fat that his belly button makes an echo
rob is so fat his cerial bowl comes with a lifeguard
Rob's so fat that every time he takes a step it causes an earthquake in Spain
Rob is so fat he was mistaken for a giant lizard-reptile when he went to Tokyo.
remember this?
http://xkcdsucks.blogspot.com/2009/08/comic-621-least-interesting-comic.html
yeah
mirror mirror on the wall
ReplyDeletewho's the fattest of them all
Hey R, you remember that one time when you copy/pasted that shit? That was cool.
ReplyDeleteThe best part is that that wasn't very good.
ReplyDeleteUm um Rob writes micro-fiction because um something something FAT. I am fitting in!
rob ate his anus with ranch?
ReplyDelete"Hey R, you remember that one time when you copy/pasted that shit? That was cool."
ReplyDeletei have failed you
Seriously, what the freak is this?
ReplyDeleteOH MY GOD SEVEN WORDS THAT I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON OH GOD OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK
ReplyDeleteYou know you've made it on xkcdsucks when you get your own personal anonymous archenemy troll.
ReplyDeleteI wish *I* had my own moronic, dedicated antagonist too cowardly to give himself a name :(
Veslfen: yeah, I love my fantrolls so much. without them I probably would have lost interest
ReplyDeleteRob, you suck.
ReplyDeleteIn response to your comment Rob the slob - oh snap! I just thought of that!
ReplyDeleteHa ha! Rob the slob! More like Rob the . . . blob! Ha! ROB THE SLOBBY BLOB!
YOU GUYS ALL SHUT UP. I AM BEING INCREDIBLY HILARIOUS RIGHT NOW.
In response to your comment ROB THE SLOB (lol), you still did not answer what the freak this is. Please answer that.
P.S. guys I heard that Rob likes to slap babies and kiss poodles for fun.
more liek rob teh blob amirite?
ReplyDeletesnob, knob, cob, mob, job, lob...
i posted to the wrong blog, and then rectified the situation by BLOWING YOUR MIND
ReplyDeleteyou bet you "rectified" it. Cause rob is a RECTUM.
ReplyDeleteHA HA HA!
I AM SO FUNNY RIGHT NOW.
letting the days go by
ReplyDeletelet the water hold me down
letting the days go by
water flowing underground
into the blue again
after the money's gone
once in a lifetime
water flowing underground
letting the days go by
ReplyDeletelet the water hold me down
letting the days go by
water flowing underground
into the blue again
after the money's gone
once in a lifetime
water flowing underground
into the blue again
into the silent water
under the rocks and stones
there is water underground
letting the days go by
into the silent water
once in a lifetime
water flowing underground
Rob is a [Captcha]
ReplyDeleteRob is a sahar!
Rob is
ReplyDeleteTwo people leaping from the Twin Towers
But they're fucking on the way down
Rob was conceived in the bloody, syphilitic santorum left behind from a Satanic orgy/human sacrifice in which over 50 children were raped and murdered
ReplyDeleteYa mama look like she's been in the dryer with some rocks, with the big bust nose sucking dirt out of socks, held up the ice cream truck with a slingshot, she grabbed a bag of Cheese Corn and a soda pop
ReplyDeleteRob is disliked by a vocal majority.
ReplyDeleteit's more like everyone hates Rob, it's just that a lot of people haven't realized it yet
ReplyDeleteyou should have left the post up there and provided no explanation
ReplyDeletethe "what-the-fuck"ery would be off the charts
if I had more time to think about it I totally would have, but I was heading out the door so I fixed it before I really thought about it.
ReplyDeleteWTF? "Not fitting in your car comfortably" Are the dreams Randall describes really that common?
ReplyDeleteI've found this site describing some common dreams: http://health.discovery.com/centers/sleepdreams/universaldreams/universaldreams.html
The description on the Discovery site of car trouble dreams sounds like dreams I've had. I've had dreams about being in an out of control car. The key is OUT OF CONTROL; brakes don't work, steering wheel doesn't work, or I'm stuck in the back seat and can't reach the steering wheel.
"Driving from the back seat" implies a measure of control; even "veering all over road" sounds like the steering wheel is at least somewhat functional. And again, how the hell is "not fitting in a car comfortably" a common dream?
all of my dreams sooner or later involve zombies
ReplyDeleteevery single one
I enjoy both xkcd and xkcdsucks.
ReplyDeleteRead xkcd without thinking about it, then come here to have it thought about for me.
It's the most passive cognitive activity one can do for humour yet. Huzzar!
I actually do basically that to be honest.
ReplyDeleteRob is a tub of lard
ReplyDeleteDISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS
ReplyDeletecan't we just get past Thunderdome?
ReplyDeleteI am afraid I must surrender the Army of Northern Virginia.
ReplyDeleteall of my dreams sooner or later involve zombies
ReplyDeleteevery single one
riiiiight. *massive eye roll*