Monday, August 10, 2009

Comic 621: The Least Interesting Comic

hello boys and girls. today's guest post is brought to you by Mr. Ego Raptor.

it is...the most boring comic in the world
There's a 60% chance Randall is friends with this guy.

Going into this guest blog, I was terrified that Randall Munroe might actually put forth some effort into his comic and force me into the awkward position of enjoying the comic. But, thankfully, Randall is generous and made his web comic that I hate based on a commercial that I hate, giving my hate such laser-like intensity that Emperor Palpatine himself would say "Chill out, man. It's not worth getting upset about." So why is this comic so bad?

For those of you who may not watch 5 hours of television a night, there is a beer called Dos Equis. "Who are they?" you might ask, and the answer is "I don't know" because no one knows who they are without googling them to sound like a smart ass in the comment sections. So Dos Equis decided to build brand recognition by making a series of commercials called "The Most Interesting Man in the World" which is a series of unfunny Chuck Norris jokes. But Dos Equis couldn't afford Chuck Norris as that would require a budget. So they hired some guy that vaguely resembles Sean Connery and filmed him doing absurd things, like carrying a fox away from British people and fighting ninjas. Unfortunately, the writers never saw the footage, so the lame Chuck Norris jokes don't match up with the absurd footage. The commercial is bad because it's derivative, talentless, and lazy.

But when it comes to being derivative, talentless, and lazy, Randall Munroe shall not be outdone! He decides to make a derivative of the derivative Chuck Norris joke (a second derivative, for those of you unfamiliar with the horrors of Calculus [can we call this comic Chuck Norris ' ' ? -carl]). Randall's idea is to be ironic, describing mundane feats while the other jokes describe incredible feats. But the joke falls flat on its face because the descriptions of the Least Interesting Man (henceforth called Limmy) are unfunny. There's nothing enjoyable you can take from this comic. A far funnier idea would be to describe Limmy's mundane behavior in a grandiose fashion (i.e. He can check his e-mail with one hand tied behind his back, He can stride while chewing Stride, he can upload pictures of stick figures to the internet and call it a comic, etc.). It takes no effort to make boring stuff sound boring. But effort is in short supply in XKCD these days. Especially when you look at what he draws.

While I criticize the commercial for never matching what I see with what I hear, at least I'm seeing unusual stuff. The commercial lets my imagination run wild compared with the infinite blandness of Munroe's comic. The first panel is just two stick figures standing there, acting so boring that not even Randall can finish the sentence. However, not to be out-lazied, the second panel is just one stick figure. But the third panel out-lazies them all, by being an honest to God paste job of an earlier xkcd.
oh man i hated that comic
Okay, maybe not an exact paste. The first panel at least illustrates two arms.

By the fourth panel, he's abandoned all hope of doing anything remotely memorable in this comic. He includes as many stick chicks in there as possible in the panel with no regard for blocking, for no apparent reason. Limmy also seems to be looking off in a random direction, babbling to a horribly illustrated cup (I know art isn't XKCD's strongpoint, but I've seen pre-schoolers draw better than that).

This comic is terrible because it rips off a terrible commercial which rips off a five year old running joke from the internet, which is inspired by Sidekicks. Earlier this summer, we could count on Randall ripping off other people's original work. But now that's too much effort for him.

If XKCD sucks anymore, it will collapse on itself.

~Ego Raptor

179 comments:

  1. "There's a 60% chance Randall is friends with this guy" And a 40% chance Randull actually is this guy.

    Another one for the Pictoblog. Maybe Carl should turn it into a category.

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  2. That's a good way of looking at it. I was wondering why a rip-off of this commercial irked me in such a way that I couldn't put my finger on it.

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  3. Randall clearly drew a whole new picture of a guy at a computer in panel 3. Is it really all that lazy to do that? I can't think of a better way to illustrate the attempted joke of that panel.

    By the way, I particularly like the alt-text for the link to the comic...

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  4. I.. think what he's doing here is 'mocking' not 'imitating.'

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  5. The title of this comic (and this post) make me want to try to apply the "interesting number paradox," except that it's possible that this man/comic is so un-interesting that even the "interesting-ness" of being the least-interesting man/comic can't push it past the next-least-interesting man/comic.

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  6. The "Chuck Norris" joke was actually inspired by Walker: Texas Ranger.

    But yeah, I didn't laugh at this one. I don't think I would even if I got the reference.

    I laughed at your joke though, mainly because of the whole "What Do You Mean, It's Not Awesome?" thing but also because I'm Australian and I find the idea of a gum actually called "Stride" fucking hilarious.

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  7. Anon: I totally thought this was a joke off of something like the interesting number paradox as well, before I read that it was about a commercial. This man is the least interesting man in the world...isn't that interesting??? i kind of like it more that way...

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  8. Today's criticism called Randall "lazy", yet it called a parody a "rip-off", which is pretty much the LAZIEST thing ever in terms of criticism. Parody and plagiarism are worlds apart, and confusing them is either sheer dumbness or dishonesty.
    Yep, today's xkcd was a parody. A pretty bland and unfunny parody, in my opinion. I'm pretty sure it could be worked into something clever, but the strip as it is now is pretty dumb and dull; it's a plain inversion of the actual ad, without anything smart going on. Maybe the "blog with four posts" thing was good, but that's it. I really disliked that strip.

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  9. Drinking yourself stupid: the social crutch of xkcd! The least interesting man has nothing on Obama/Gates/Crowley!

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  10. I've said this in the last comment section, but it pertains here. For a person who enjoys the commercials, other than the few Chuck Norris-esque jokes, the humor is derived from the clever misuse of phrases (example: 'He lives vicariously through himself', or 'he can speak russian, in french'). But Randall didn't spend the time to think up any clever wordplay, or hell, he doesn't even bother coming up with some lame internet memes to replace the wordplay, he just puts in some wholy uninteresting and uninspired subversions of the original joke.

    Full disclosure: I don't understand Chuck Norris jokes, I mean, I hardly even understand why people think he is even that awe-inspiring. He's no Clint Eastwood.

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  11. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  12. It ain't a copy-paste. Mr. Raptor's image caption concedes this. (Consider also the difference in legs and angle of monitor.) It's inadvertent repetition. Draw enough stick figures at a computer, especially with a, how to say, 'minimalist' art style, and eventually there will be images looking the same.

    he can upload pictures of stick figures to the internet and call it a comic, etc - 'the least interesting webcomic in the world' is a rewrite waiting to happen.

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  13. Someone started a thread about the alt text on the Steam forums and got shot down for three pages:
    XKCD referances TF2 - Steam Users' Forums

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  14. THIS POST SUCKS. Not just because it's written by faux-Egoraptor. Yeah I don't care if he does a space in between. I don't even care if this faux-Egoraptor came first. Faux-Egoraptor is lame, lame, lameness.
    The comic was okay, kinda humorous if you know the ad. This post was...boring and unfunny. Sorry, faux-Egoraptor.

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  15. james: Hmm... You're right. On second, more calmer consideration I may have overreacted. A little. Sorry, everyone irritated by this. Not sorry, Randall. There is still too much similarity for me. I dunno, maybe he was looking through his archives when he got the idea?

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  16. I actually laughed at the "he can stride while chewing Stride" idea.

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  17. Re the TF2 thread.

    They have a guy who pretends he is Randall.
    We have a guy who pretends he isn't Randall.

    Can we swap?

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  18. @Carl & Anon:
    How long till we see an xkcd post about the ininteresting numbers paradox?

    That would prove that Carl == rmunroe.

    AWESOME

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  19. The comic succeeds at what it tries, that is being absolutely boring and uninteresting.

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  20. So the Ego Raptor of this post ISN'T Egoraptor of Metal Gear Awesome fame?

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  21. I wish it was so hard.

    I actually found this comic a bit funny. I didn't laugh, but I almost smiled. Maybe that's because the commercials are aired regularly over here, and so I got the reference right away. The TF2 reference was blatant pandering, though.

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  22. I expected Fernie to say this, and that I would get annoyed because I feel the same way and I hate agreeing with Fernie, but: how the hell is that a copy paste? It's a guy at a desk. He often draws a guy at a desk, and consequently the picture of the guy at the desk often looks like the other pictures of the guy at the desk. I mean, this is like criticizing Charles Schulz for always drawing Snoopy on the dog house the exact same way.

    Not that Randy is in any way comparable to Charles Schulz, naturally.

    Fun fact: if I was a poster on the XKCD forums I would have called them "Mr. Munroe" and "Mr. Schulz", because that's just the sort of thing they'd do.

    Anyway, apart from that I agree, especially about how the guy in the last panel is apparently talking to nothing while holding a glass of whatever. And the Stride thing made me laugh.

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  23. Also there are two arms in both those pictures.

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  24. You criticized the art? Really?

    ... Of a stick comic?

    ...Really?

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  25. Yes. It is so terrible that, even by stick comic standards, it sux deluxe.

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  26. don't you have something better to do with your life?

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  27. oh man what deep insight i have resolved to change my ways forever

    JUST KIDDING no i do not have something better to do. Clearly you don't, either.

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  28. I am, in fact, doing better things with my life.

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  29. What the blog of a jealous, uninspired, sad person might look like.

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  30. that isn't even a complete sentence

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  31. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  32. Crap, posted a half complete post, Reposting now.

    Hey, its M again, unless I'm lieing. You'll never know. But at least this time I bothered to register myself as something, so you three people who saw my previous post will have to be stuck in endless turmoil over if I'm the true M or not. First off, a few things about the premise of the comic, Dos Aquis is a chep Mexican beer and their spokesperson is supposed to look like an aging Zorro or something. They seem to be trying to establish it as a recurring series of commercials. Don't get me wrong, its occasionally funny, but every single commercial entity I've seen has been characterized in some way so you want to see the commercial. Like the Geico Geko, or the cavemen, or that one baby for the investment company that sounds like a stoned college student. They all have a pre established premise that they build on. With Señor Dos Equis is just some bum looking pretty while they talk about him. Hopefully some of you will divine what I'm trying to imply: Characterization has to occur for quality comedy to follow. Think about that Randall, as you cry yourself to sleep cause some crazy guy made a group that doesn't wuv you. Anyway, back to the comic. I like two of the panels, and I hated the other two. I think that Randall tried to cram a shitload of jokes in so everyone would have something to like. In honor of Dos Equis, I will be numbering thins in spanish, courtesy of U2's vertigo.

    Uno- He thinks he's fucking important and Rambles to his friends, like Randall- Hmmm.... This convienently lacks a punch line. Its just about how people like to talk about their dreams. I'm pretty sure theres an xkcd about that, but I'm goddamn lazy. You go look it up.

    Dos- Fuckin French- This one makes me angry, not cause of the joke, but because of how many idiots think they speak french. I actually do speak french, and when morons hear a french accent they seem to think its some secret club of idiots who took half a semester in high school. They blunder up to me with an accent thats so nasal it makes it sound like they just took a bumb of cocaine and slowly murdering a bawn jore as it grinds its way out of their mouth.... God I hope this isn't one of Randalls subtle self referencing comics.

    Tres- Lonely, hopeless blogs- This one made me laugh, not cause it was inherently astounding or new, but because its obvious. It wasnt a 'OMFG RANDALL TEH MIND REEDER!!!1!' moment, but I've seen blogs like that. Nobody loves blogs (this siteisnt a blog, its a review, cause I said so), and I suppose thats why I find it funny. Who cares if its obvious or not, I like it. Maybe this is proof of randall trying a picto blog and it just dieing, like every blog ever.

    Catorce- Randall approving binge drinking- This one got a laugh out of me at first, because I though 'Christ, what a nerd' but it has a creepy underlying feel. Firstly, the art is crap, but on the third squint I realized its supposed to be a bar, why he's at a chair and drinking beer out of a cup when we already know Randall can draw a bottle (See- the president binge drinking to cure our nations ills comic). Second, it implies that those of us who don't drink in large amounts are losers. I don't call them losers, I call them convent rides home.

    -M, supposedly

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  33. Welcome, Anonymous. Ignore the vermin.

    [i]"Clearly you don't, either."[/i]

    Au contraire, whore.
    Your entire defensive strategy boils down to false accusations of hypocrisy and ad hominem attacks.
    Here is an Internet Relay Chat conversion of your entire asinine argument.

    Anonymous: This blag does not seem to be very welcoming...
    Roberto: U R GAY
    Anonymous: Perhaps your time could be better spent? Transform destructive energy into creative energy?
    A-Man-DUH: FAG Y DONT U LOL HIPPOPOTAMUSY

    Do you not see that you are WASTING your time by trying to villify a legend (the great Randall Patrick Munroe, of course)? What are you trying to accomplish? Are you simple-minded anarchists or is there a more reasonable objective to your acts of supreme evil?

    Attempting to dispel the illusions of your delusions is NOT "hippopotamusy", it is, infact, heroism. I am impressed, Anonymous.

    Don't falter. Join my side, let the forces of right and order triumph!

    -William Monty Hughes
    IQ 224
    "Cogito Ergo Sum"

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  34. Good Sir Hughes, your motto should be "Cogito Parum Ergo Sum Vegrandis" It's fitting, but sorry about the butchered latin.

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  35. "I expected Fernie to say this, and that I would get annoyed because I feel the same way and I hate agreeing with Fernie"

    Heh heh, I'm glad I didn't mention it, because other people have addressed the issue far better than I could. The "parody/rip-off" issue irked me far more, because I've seen that mistake in many other places and I think it's quite fatal. Today's review wasn't bad, there were some very valid points, but unfortunately it was spoiled by some lazy or asinine parts.
    But why do you hate to agree with me, MAAAN? :( Of course I speak in xkcd's favour when the strip is good, and I point out the flaws in the reviews EVEN when the strip is bad (which was the case today), but I don't go around distorting things just to try to like the comic. Well... okay, sometimes I sound like that. Yeah, okay, I'm probably annoying as hell.

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  36. Yeah, okay, I'm probably annoying as hell.

    Yes.

    WILLY YOU SHALL PAY FOR CALLING ME A MAN DUH. I DON'T KNOW HOW BUT YOU WILL

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  37. You just complained that

    1: The least interesting man in the world does boring things.
    2: 2 images of dudes sitting at computers appeared in FREAKIN' XKCD!
    3: A cup with water in it is simple when viewed from the side
    and
    4: That when arms held at the same height, and viewed from the side, one is behind the other. (BTW, you CAN see two arms.)

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  38. Oh, Fernie. I think you're annoying, and while I don't think you go around distorting things to try to like the comic, I think you do go around distorting things what people said they dislike about comics. But that thing about hating to agree with you was.. I don't know, tongue in cheekish. I guess.

    Also you called Amanda a man.

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  39. WILLY HUGE!

    begone from my web-site! never sully this bandwidth with your chubby, butter-soaked fingers again! this is a place for serious discussion, not blatant sycophancy! do not make me call the authorities. I have warned you, Willy Huge. I have warned you.

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  40. 1: The least interesting man in the world does boring things.


    No, the real problem is that the least interesting man in the world makes for the least interesting comic in the world.

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  41. I didn't get this one, because they don't have this commercial in my country. In fact, here in Russia it is forbidden to have people in TV beer commercials! But yeah, now that I watched it, I think it was another lazy joke from Randall that fell flat on its face. It's just as boring as the guy that it describes.

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  42. COVIZAPIBETEFOKY: That's about as likely as Carl ceasing to criticize his own comics.

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  43. Thank you Fred.

    wait did fernie really call me a man, i thought that was willy

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  44. I DON'T NEED YOUR THOUGHT CONTROL

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  45. or your dark sarcasm in the classroom

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  46. for I have become comfortably numb!

    (oops)

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  47. you gotta be able to pick up the easy meat

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  48. I didn't get the Dos Equis reference, but I thought the observations were sort of astute. Would've probably enjoyed the comic more if I hadn't felt like Randall was talking specifically about me.

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  49. you guys i made an edit woohoo

    carl you cannot accuse me of not wanting to be a part of the xkcdsucks family ever again

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  50. New xkcd.
    It's pretty bad.

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  51. Agreed.

    He could have at least posted it around finals time, so that people would be like relating to it and stuff. But it's uh summer now.

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  52. This... wow. I don't even know. Mostly I'm just sort of curious what Fernie will say about it.

    Because I have nothing constructive to say, I'll just post the actual proof that there are infinitely many primes.

    This will be a proof by way of contradiction.

    Suppose, for the sake of the contradiction, that there are finitely many primes. There must, therefore, be a largest prime, P. Consider the product of all primes. This product is an integer, by multiplicative closure of the integers, and it is larger than P. Call this product F.

    Consider F+1. F+1 has no prime divisors from 2 to P. 2 does not divide F+1, because 2 is a divisor of F, and so F+1 divided by 2 leaves a remainder of 1. 3 is not a divisor of F+1, because 3 is a divisor of F and so F+1 divided by 3 leaves a remainder. In fact, EVERY prime leaves a remainder of 1 when you divide F+1 by that prime. Therefore, either F+1 has no prime divisors (in which case F+1 is larger than P) or it has a prime divisor which is larger than P.

    This is a contradiction, since we already supposed that P is the largest prime number. Therefore, there cannot be finitely many prime numbers.

    The wording is kind of wonky since I just wrote it on the fly and it's been a while since I had a proof class.

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  53. no it makes sense i'm fresh out of a discrete mathematics course tho

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  54. The thought bubble on the last panel should have been in the first panel. It really ruins the flow where it is.

    Otherwise I thought the comic was decent. Not laugh out loud funny or anything, but fits xkcd's shtick (the shtick that isn't deeply problematic like "stalking" or "madcap references" -- this does reference math but the reference itself is unimportant).

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  55. I should probably have specified things like: The set of all primes is non-empty since 2 is a prime.

    And to be really formal I should've had stuff about the division algorithm in there, and pointed out that a remainder of 1 (which is greater than or equal to zero and strictly less than the divisor) is unique and therefore it CANNOT be evenly divided.

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  56. But I felt pretentious enough as it was, so I didn't.

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  57. This one is pathetic, really.

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  58. 622: Randall stumbles on a math-related haiku, shoehorns it into a comic.

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  59. Man that dude even included a link to my profile! NICE impersonation!

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  60. Mal, specifying that stuff would be silly. Unless you were working with a general PID, in which case it's pretty vitally important.

    There was an almost creepy GOOMH feeling with this one (like, less "get out of my head, Randall" and more "are you fucking stalking me, Randall?"), but I can't actually tell you why because of my desire to retain some level of anonymity.

    I'd also like to point out that if you don't already know the standard proof that there are infinitely many primes, this comic tells you ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY NOTHING. I've written proofs in iambic gorram pentameter before, I know for a fact you can do better than that. (Search YT for "One Geometry" if you want to see an even betterer example, which I didn't write, but wish I had.)

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  61. okay harrison you have to tell us now, you are so not allowed to withold any possibility for us to learn more of Randy's creepy nature

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  62. also my childhood neighbor was named harrison, i feel this gives you and me a special bond

    so SPILL

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  63. "Sleep-dep" pissed me off. Anyone else? It's just the kind of annoying-ass phrase Randers would use.

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  64. I can't stop reading that as "annoying ass-phrase."

    farrrrrrrt

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  65. yeah, sleep-dep makes it sound like it's something he does all the time, like he thinks it's some sort of badass drug. it is exactly the sort of douchey thing Randy would say all the time

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  66. Actually, sleep-dep sounds like something you could buy in a pharmacy.

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  67. I really think that "sleep dep" is just a result of him poorly cramming the text in a space where he underestimated the amount of letters he could fit.

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  68. I think so too but the fact remains that he wrote it down and left it there.

    probably thought to himself "wow that actually sounds so hip and funky"

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  69. I can vouch that "sleep-dep" is genuine MIT argot, so it's not that he made it up on the spot. (It does usually occur in the construction "sleep-depped," though, and it doesn't make it not annoying.)

    Amanda: heh, I don't really think Randy's Internet Stalking me. There's a thread on a mathematical blog discussing a problem related to prime numbers (one that wasn't solved 2500 years ago, though) on which I posted a few sleep-deprived comments with the caveat that I was sleep-depped. Nothing haiku-like, though, and certainly nothing involving, like, anyone flying. Still, I have no actual reason to believe that Randy saw the thread in question, or knows I exist or anything. (:-/)

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  70. Wait is the joke meant to be the haiku or the fact that sleep deprivation has WACKY effects on people?

    It seems to me that Randall decided to make a math-haiku (or had found a math-haiku and wanted to make a comic about it). He then discovered it was boring on its own (boring for a webcomic, anyway) so he added in a flying lecturer and changed the subject to sleep deprivation instead, causing either of the two possible subjects of the joke to fail.

    tl;dr:
    Math proofs told in language - potential humour
    Wacky effects of sleep deprivation - potential humour
    Doing a half-ass job of including both: fail.

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  71. Uh of all the things to get upset at, "sleep dep"? It was my impression it was a fairly common phrase. Searching for it gets very productive results, even. I don't think he intended to be at all obscure or exclusive.

    Not to say I like this comic. It sucked. Hard. It's a beautiful proof that he crammed into a crappy poem and an unfunny joke. Wonderful, Randall. Just wonderful.

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  72. harrison: It's not exclusively MIT argot unless I've somehow been using MIT argot fluently with friends since at least the beginning of high school and without ever knowing anyone who went to MIT.

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  73. I saw this in an interview with another webcomic artist and found this particular question relevant:

    ------------------------

    What do you have to say, to those who are negative about your comic?

    More power to them. Cartooning can be a solitary task and it’s easy to develop tunnel vision. Without constructive criticism, a writer might not know he’s headed towards a cliff until he’s over it. The people on my forum help keep me honest, and the comic wouldn’t be near as good without all the input I get from the readers about what I’m doing right and wrong.

    ------------------------

    Compare that to Randall's view of criticism (try and make the person feel bad) and decide which is the better approach.

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  74. I read today's comic and went like "...really?"

    Aside from being a shitty joke, that's really shitty dialoge. GEE EVERYTHING SURE IT MORE INTERESTING IF YOU HAVEN'T SLEPT FOR 48 HOURS ISN'T THAT RIGHT, MYSELF? THIS IS HOW PEOPLE THINK

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  75. Until I read this
    I did not know you could have
    a four line haiku.

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  76. you don't know very much
    about haiku then,
    andrew.

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  77. Why would you ever stay up for over 48 hours (on purpose), unless you were trying to set a world record or something? The guy in the comic seems to imply that he does this recreationally, and on a regular basis. As a long-time fan of sleeping, I do not grok.

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  78. It's a few years since I was in uni doing this kind of thing, but isn't the proof just plain wrong as well? Top prime's divisors are top prime and 1 surely...

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  79. Clare:

    Randall's wording here is just awkward; what he's trying to express (I'm pretty sure) is Euclid's proof. In that case, a better haiku would be something like:

    Product of first n
    primes, plus one: its factors are...?
    Thus, primes are endless!

    Okay, it's not that great, but I think it's more accurate at least. :)

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  80. Yeah, I immediately jumped to my hazy recollections of Euclid's proof when I saw the comic, then I actually read it properly and got really confused. The fact that it talks about top-prime's divisors takes it from past unhelpful for those who haven't seen the proof before to actually just wrong, top-prime's divisors have nothing to do with anything.

    Either way yours is much better! I was trying to think of an accurate haiku and failing abysmally...

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  81. take the highest prime
    and all before, add them
    then add one, new prime

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  82. Slight variation of Person #1:

    Take the highest prime
    And the sum of all before
    Add one: get new prime

    CAPTCHA is 'packtin'
    After they saw my haiku,
    They went and packtin

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  83. Except you don't add up all the primes, you take their product. And the product plus one isn't necessarily prime.

    But whatever, they're both still better than Randy's.

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  84. Randy had to through in the QED, BITCHES part at the end, thus forcing him to compress the rest. Kind of like Cuddlefish Prime's version, actually.

    I, too, have a love affair with sleeping, and therefore cannot relate to this comic.

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  85. I actually like Freefall, when I can remember to check it, because although the humor is really simple and the author's anti-bureaucrat axe-grinding is kind of annoying, there's a really interesting world in which it's set and the science is actually all pretty valid and interesting and I like learning more about what's going on with it. Plus it hasn't yet tripped my carefully-calibrated Objectivist gauge, which alerts me when an author is trying to out-Rand Ayn Rand.

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  86. Okay, I hate this strip. It's a bloody mess of half-ideas, goddamn haiku poetry (is there anything more cliché on the whole Internet?), wonky pacing and a HORRIBLY misworded proof. Just look at that: it tells you to multiply the divisors of the "top prime". Wut? That proof makes no sense, as it was pointed out in the comic's thread by some people. If you suppose the "top prime" is 3, multiply its divisors (1 * 3 = 3) and add one you'll find 4, whose factor is 2. Therefore 3 is the top prime? What the HELL, Randall?

    What an awful strip. Q.E.D. YOUR ASS, bitch.

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  87. I'm a mathematician and it made me rage. Top prime divisors? WTF is that supposed to mean?

    Captcha: mackases. LOL. Mack asses.

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  88. I too am enraged by this latest comic, although I enjoyed the last one.

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  89. http://echochamber.me/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=43757#p1729832

    He enjoys ending arguments with QED? oh dear, there are severe problems here.

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  90. irrelevant: Andrew L I momentarily thought you were my sweetie but it turns out you are Canadian.

    anyway the other proposed haikus were much, MUCH better than Randall's.

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  91. I would have preferred this comic if the hallucination wasn't so boring.
    The lecturer flying and then doing a haiku? Really? THAT'S it?

    I think if the lecturer was a talking, flying elephant or something, it might have been funnier.

    Don't know why.

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  92. I legitimately enjoyed this comic. I found it to be witty and clever, combining the humor present in juxtaposing math and bad poetry. Randall Munroe has such talent at mixing genres! I believe that this particular comic has entitled Mr. Munroe to be known as the Michael Curtiz of the comic world.

    The fact that this comic is largely based on the further humor present in staying up late and experiencing hallucinations means that there is even another level of depth present here. We as the reader do not known for certain whether or not this comic is even real, as it could exist entirely in the sleep deprived characters head.

    Oh it is so clever! So amusing! I think I will now proceed to make XKCD my homepage so I can see it everytime I open up Internet Explorer 6!

    Hi Amanda!

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  93. I'm going to kill you guys.

    Chris Lord, I am no longer friends with you but am still demanding you mix me that pineappley drink again.

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  94. "I found it to be witty and clever, combining the humor present in juxtaposing bad math and bad poetry."

    fixed, dumbass.

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  95. (not that I agree with the first half, but Chris Lord is entitled to his opinion)

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  96. Chris Lord, you're no William Monty Hughes; but I admire your effort nonetheless.

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  97. DAMMIT!

    No one's going to believe me when I say this, but I'm going to say it anyway:

    I realized Chris Lord's post was a parody half way through reading it, and then I completely forgot after I read Amanda's post, and proceeded to write my own response.

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  98. It's okay, Coviza, we forgive you. Your bold and italicized exclamation shows you feel true remorse.

    captcha: singnow. DO IT

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  99. Someone on the LJ-feed offered:

    Product of all primes --
    Add one, and the factors are...?
    Q.E.D bitches!

    Which I think besides keeping Randy's oh-so-clever last line and being more accurate than his version; also flows waaaaaay beetter.

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  100. Its not a parody. I actually liked the comic.

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  101. could you at least stop pretending you are chris, you are tainting his good name

    though i think he likes xkcd too

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  102. Then it is impossible for his name to be tainted any more than it already is.

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  103. Your post screams parody, therefore it is parody.

    Of course, something akin to poe's law may apply here...

    (dammit there's no wikipedia page I can link to on poe's law!)

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  104. I actually kind of liked this comic. Maybe I'm swayed by the fact that I actually enjoy this commercial, which I aired semi-regularly around here (and the beer it advertises isn't bad either). But compared to the other xkcds we've had recently this is.... decent.

    I disagree with most of the poster's criticism. 1. it's a parody not a rip-off as many have pointed out.
    2.You called the girls at the end pointless, but the point is that they are ignoring him while he talks to himself (not hanging on his every word as in the add).
    3. There just no point picking on Randall's art anymore. Crappy art is his signature now.

    I think, as Kirk said near the top, the only way to signifigantly improve this comic is using wordplay. At least say the "unintersting" things in a witty way, or a way resembling the silly impossibilities of language in the original add. Then I may have actually laughed. And this would have been filed under the rare category of "good recent XKCD comics"

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  105. Dear Mr. Chris Lord,
    Please take solace in the support of the masses of truly sophisticated and intellectually unstunted fans of xkcd who appreciate your championing of our dearest Dr. Munroe. Do not allow their projection onto your wise words of their own paradoxical parodying of Dr. Munroe's munificence towards the unwashed unworthies of the internet to sap your strength. Some still subscribe to sanity's insistent summons that such sharpness and sense of satire as is supplied by Dr. Munroe is precious and necessary. Know that I am with you, Dear Mr. Lord, and fight on.

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  106. I enjoy the Dos Equis ads but still didn't pick up on the parody until the narrator's bit of the last panel. I wonder, if it were done with more of the flair of the ads, would the complaint be that he'd reinvented the "for great justice!" meme? Anyway, I liked the last two panels, but the first two got bogged down in explaining the joke.

    For 622, the flying was too over the top for me, but that's ok. My only real complaint is, as others said, the poem made no sense. Taking the poem that Clare shared with us and Randall Munroe's original comic (and a bit from 154), here's an alternative approach. Imagine that the alt text were, "After the 48-hour sleep-dep mark, lectures get really interesting." I imagine it's the female student speaking in the alt text.

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  107. Haiku should be clear
    as water from mountain brooks.
    Today's proof: as mud.

    Cluttered thought bubble
    Of last panel: amusing,
    But move to alt-text.

    Stick men like tinder
    Picture mortality. Flesh
    passes like firewood.

    But today give thanks
    for lacking quirky lovers
    and stick figure pr0n.

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  108. james should learn
    that five-seven-five
    does not haiku make

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  109. Rob should learn it does.

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  110. After taking a closer look, this page is a little more appropriate, but it still says a 5-7-5 a haiku makes.

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  111. i don't see any problems with Being Right.

    actually, your wiki article (which, trust me, I have read and know quite well) says that 5-7-5 is an acceptable form; it does not make something a haiku. 5-7-5 is neither necessary nor sufficient to a haiku.

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  112. Rob, I seem to recall reading what somewhere, but the Wiki article does seem to say that 5-7-5 is the correct form (although its not 5-7-5 syllables, but something a bit more complicated)

    Could you point to where it says 5-7-5 isn't necessary? (Its definitely not sufficient)

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  113. Rob's obesity ended the Cold War

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  114. http://www.ahapoetry.com/haiku.htm is a good resource.

    5-7-5 is
    not always needed when you
    compose a haiku

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  115. I've always thought that the seasonal reference and the caesura were more important in creating a haiku than the count. But since most people learn haikus in grade school, the more complex part gets lost.

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  116. in Japanese, a haiku consists of 17 moras, broken into a metric pattern of 5/7/5.

    the whole article talks about forms of haiku which are not 5/7/5 in pattern: "use of three lines of UP TO 17 syllables" (emphasis mine), etc.

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  117. kirk: i've always thought that YOUR FACE was more important in creating haiku

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  118. So a haiku with 17 syllables is still a haiku. Thanks for looking stupid. Let's play again!

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  119. Rob, I do not understand why this discussion of haiku makes you so defensive. Is it some deep seated hatred for a teacher who failed a haiku you made, or perhaps does it stem from a break up letter written in 5-7-5?

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  120. I just like trolling people who think that haiku are always 5/7/5

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  121. anon: you will note that I merely said it wasn't necessary, not that it was not a haiku. thanks for playing though

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  122. i gotta say that "fatty" is the most amusing insult i have ever heard on this here blog

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  123. "james should learn
    that five-seven-five
    does not haiku make"

    "you will note that I merely said it wasn't necessary, not that it was not a haiku"

    I don't recall James ever saying they were only 17 syllables. You just came out to look like a dick for no reason. So you're stupid and a liar. Thanks for playing.

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  124. james wrote exclusively 5-7-5 haiku, because he thinks that is what a haiku is. it is a trait he shares with randy, apparently! 5-7-5 is not, by and large, a constraint that people who know about haiku use.

    i'm not sure where you're getting the whole 'liar' idea, but if that helps you sleep at night. i'm sure your first grade teacher didn't know she was teaching you inaccurately, if it helps.

    also: are you not capable of finding a dismissive conclusion that doesn't end with some variation of 'thanks for playing?' seriously, there are so many to choose from. thanks for playing really only works like once. it was a stretch when i did it.

    hugs and kisses!
    rob

    OH PS yes i am obviously just doing this to be a dick. consider yourself trolled

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  125. Rob said, "Haiku can't 17 syllables!"

    Rob said, "Haiku can be 17 syllables!"

    Rob said, "I'm schizophrenic! Or maybe bipolar. There are so many things I can't tell the differentiate."

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  126. man, you are dumb.

    i never said haiku cannot be 17 syllables. only that having 17 syllables does not make something a haiku. literacy is a useful trait.

    also, that's not what schizophrenia or bipolar means.

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  127. Well, you would know.

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  128. yeah, i'm an expert on stupid people on the internet. turns out, you're one of them

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  129. Rob gave up on wearing belts years ago. His mom still calls him handsome.
    Rob's fingers are more dangerously cheesy than Cheetos.
    Rob's fingers are more dangerously cheesy than Cheetos.
    Rob brushes his teeth with lard.
    Rob once tried to stimulate his anus with a carrot stick. He soon gave up and ate it with some ranch
    Rob is the admin of Mcdonalds.
    rob is the admin of gravity.
    i was like, yo mamma is so fat. turned out yo mamma was rob
    rob is so fat that when his thighs rub together it sparks and makes forest fires in australia
    but hes so fat that he never moves enough for his thighs to rub together
    but hes so fat that he never moves enough for his thighs to rub together. thats why australia still exists
    HIS BELT IS THE EQUATOR
    Rob doesn't care it's not butter
    Rob has a high cholesterol and doesn't exercise on a regular basis.
    rob has diabetes and an overactive thyroid
    he has more chins than a chinese phonebook
    when rob stood on the scales it said too be continued.
    Rob is so fat, he eats lots.
    rob is so fat he was baptized in Sea World.
    rob is so fat, people jog around him for exercise.
    rob is so fat he needs a VCR for a pager

    rob is so fat that his belly button makes an echo

    rob is so fat his cerial bowl comes with a lifeguard
    Rob's so fat that every time he takes a step it causes an earthquake in Spain
    Rob is so fat he was mistaken for a giant lizard-reptile when he went to Tokyo.

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  130. That, my friend, is a burn. One of epic proportions.

    Booyah!

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  131. HEY

    it is organic lard SUBSTITUTE thank you very much

    (fun fact: vegetarians who don't just starve themselves tend to be fatties much more than meat eaters)

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  132. this one is my favorite: "Rob has a high cholesterol and doesn't exercise on a regular basis."

    ouch, man

    ouch

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  133. Rob what happened to the rhubarbs?
    Not unhealthy enough for you?

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  134. the organic lard substitute is made of rhubarb

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  135. Rhubarb is fucking rank. You disgust me.

    Snabi- What Rob is

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  136. Here are some definitions of 'Rob', courtesy of Urban Dictionary:

    "Roll Over the Belt. Girls who wear tight shirts and have a roll of fat that goes over her belt is a ROB.
    1: Dude, check out that girl, she looks dope!
    2: Forget it, you've got your beer goggles on, she's a ROB!"

    "Rob - One who is an over controlling and self-assured jerk. Can also be described as a person who is likely to brag about his newest Statistics vocabulary to make himself seem smarter.

    A Rob- Well you see since the sample size is so large I can calculate with a 95% confidence that we will see a ten percent to fifteen percent on our ability to......

    Normal person- "Shut up!!! Your being such a Rob!!!"

    "Synonymous to 'rage'.
    Hence, to 'Rob' is to rage, and gives rise to such terms as 'Rob quitting' and 'ROB ROB ROB ROB'
    Rob: "Guys, I'm not in the mood"
    Someone Else: "That's what she said"
    Rob: "That's it, I'm out."

    *Server: Rob has left the server*
    Someone Else: "Dude awesome he just Rob quit. "

    "Caucasian male whos balls r bigger then his head welcome rob
    Rob likes old men"

    "NOB.

    beth: oh look it's rob

    sophie: WHAT A NOB. "

    "A big hairy ape like creature, with no penis. although if you ask him he will brag about it being huge.

    Can also be a queer asshole with no life
    wow dude he is a total rob "

    "Ginger guys
    Luke: Look At That Tall Ginger Guy
    Alex: His Name Has Gotta Be Rob "

    "A bald egg-shaped ogre lacking a sense of humour with crooked teeth and a small fat penis alos known as a chode.
    Get away from me you Rob."

    "alternative name for a gay
    Girl, I have been robbed , my ex boyfirend is now seeing a man "

    Clearly, most if not all of these apply to Rob in some way.

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  137. "The ultimate comeback for anything anywhere. Even for "Your Mom!", Also used to define something large, fat or humoungous.

    No offense to Robs and their moms.
    Person 1 : Your face...
    Person 2: ROB'S MOM!!

    Person 1: Gosh that thing is HUGE.
    Person 2: ...Not as huge as Rob's mom!!

    Person 1: Your mom!!
    Person 2: No, ROB'S MOM!!

    Person 1: I want a burger
    Person 2: You know who else wants a burger?
    Person 1: Oh man! Rob's mom?!
    Person 2: OH YOU SO WENT THERE.

    Person 1: I'm as upset as Rob's mom at an all you can eat buffet when the food runs out...
    Person 2: OH SNAP! "

    "the name of a very fat, felching homosexual guy named rob
    (also see huggie bear)
    Fat Rob felched the homeless guy down the street "

    Are you ablooing yet, Rob?

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  138. So Rob, out of curiosity (and since this very topic has surfaced here at least once before), what ARE the necessary properties of haiku such that not every 5-7-5 sequence is a haiku, and conversely? Because I was under the impression that 5-7-5 was simply the definition of a certain type of (modern, Anglicized) haiku, just as "14 lines, iambic pentameter, ABAB CDCD EFEF GG" is the definition of a certain type of sonnet (Shakespearean*, as opposed to Italian etc.). Ain't no rule says the poem has to be good in order to qualify, right?


    *(And yes, I do realize that few of Shakespeare's sonnets don't follow that format precisely.)

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  139. Are you Ego Raptor from Newgrounds?

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  140. 1:35, I never said any of that!

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  141. Why 60% chance he's Randall's friend? He criticised the comic.

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  142. Amanda: always happy to amuse.

    Everyone else who stupidly continued to attack Rob for no clear reason except stupidity: wow.

    Anon 1:35: oh, you done it now! Person #1 is going to sue you for impersonation!

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  143. I am not sure why it took my post, rather than Randall's original comment, to start the Haiku Wars, but it did! Rob, you are basically objecting to writing doggerel in haiku form. (And yes, I do know that haiku is more than just syllables.)

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  144. ...Randall's original comic, I mean. D'oh.

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  145. What the fuck is a rhubarb and why does it keep showing up in my fucking pie? Ew.

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  146. james I am not objecting to anything I am just trolling people, because it is the single greatest form of trolling known to man. seriously.

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  147. As opposed to trolling things that are not people?

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  148. by "it" I mean "trolling people about haiku," which apparently I didn't make clear somehow

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  149. Actually, haiku is just about the syllables.

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  150. Rob that was not actually a sentence.

    (aside: guys I do not think Rob is too smart)

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  151. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xoxo

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  152. I have come across people seriously arguing about haiku in this manner (in the xkcd forums, if I recall aright), which is why I failed to realise your frivolity.

    Also I'd add in some insults of my own but I suck at that kinda thing, so just consider your mother generically insulted by me.

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  153. as far as I'm concerned the defining characteristic of a haiku is that you call it a haiku--I am a poet in the school of "if you say so." though in my experience the 5/7/5 is an unnecessary restriction and they are often much more elegant without it. and I am willing to bet that Randy thinks that 5/7/5 is necessary and sufficient for a haiku, because he is the wrong type of nerd to know shit about poetry.

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  154. Rob: He knows shit about haiku

    Captcha: Narall. *Almost* an angram of 'Randall'.

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  155. i think we might be using 'know shit' differently?

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  156. God, I'm such an idiot.

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  157. I'm glad I agree with myself.

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  158. yeah i'm the best person out there to agree with

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  159. you're definitely the FATTEST person out there to agree with

    (boom!)

    (i'm sorry rob)

    (oh god)

    (i... i don't mean it)

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  160. Seriously... I drank Dos Equis long before those commercials came out. It's not like it was an incredibly obscure beer. But then again, this blog didn't know what "Burma Shave" was.

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  161. I actually found this thread by looking for a specific comic (and thanks for helping me find it), but I think you all need to go find something better to do with your time. Maybe learn how to play an instrument, or even just go smoke some pot in your basement. He writes a comic. If you don't like it, don't read it. Its not like its so ubiquitous you can't avoid it. Whining about it won't stop him from continuing to write them.

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  162. Its not like its so ubiquitous you can't avoid it.

    Riiiiiiiiight.

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  163. Actually, Randall just told one of us that every time he reads this site it makes him not want to draw comics for a few days. So whining actually will help stop him. Thanks for playing! Better luck next time.

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  164. It's really sad what you've done here. You've outright proven scientifically that not only you don't have a life, you'll probably never get to develop one.

    Why?

    Because I'm writing this from below your bed and will kill you in your sleep.

    Cheers ^ ^

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  165. but if i will never have a life, shouldn't i at least spend my time doing this, which i enjoy?

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