"EVER WANTED AN XKCD TIE?"
The answer, for me at least, is no. Well, perhaps I should clarify that - the technical answer is yes, I have ever wanted one, namely, a few years ago when xkcd was funny and it was something I would want to be attached to my neck. But now, no. No I do not want an xkcd tie. And if I did, I would want it to be clever or nerdy, the way the good xkcd comics - even now - are. I wouldn't want it to just be covered in low-res stick figures.
Seriously, they don't even have a normal Mr. Stick! Fuck, they don't even have xkcd's one character, Mr. Hat! They have Guy on Chair, Guy on Ground, Guy In Ball. They have two Girls Lyring On Their Stomachs, which i find only a little strange, and then there's also the word "xkcd" at the bottom. You know, the bottom is the part that ends up by your crotch. Why not have "xkcd" right there?
I made fun of the last new shirt Randall brought us, and said, among other things, that the only reason you would buy it is "to prove to other people that you are a fan of xkcd and a nerd." I think that's true here as well, since on its own the tie is fairly ugly. No humor, just kind of scattered stick figures. Not even any fun colors...this is just to show off that you like xkcd, nothing more at all. xkcd has gone from being a thing that people like because it is good to a think that people like because it is cool to like. And so the merchandise goes from being a good thing on its own to just being a thing that shows the world that you like xkcd.
But my favorite part is that it costs $32. what? Who the fuck wants to spend that much on a goddamn xkcd tie? $19 for a shirt is also pretty expensive but at least that covers your whole chest, and even the top of your arms! This is...this is not so much. Hell, it's twice as much as the awesome 8-Bit ties that Think Geek sells.
NO that's a lie, my favorite part is here:
Did you catch it? Look again!
you fucking misspelled "characters". What a god damn idiot you are! Yesterday's comic you misspelled "dysentery," the comic before that you got your whole proof wrong. I've said before that you should get an editor, and you didn't listen, and so I'll say it again - get a fucking editor. Now I know most webcomics don't have them, but most webcomics don't fuck up on a regular basis like you do.
anyway, have fun with your tie, randall. wear it to the webcomic awards show. no one else wants to buy it.
I made fun of the last new shirt Randall brought us, and said, among other things, that the only reason you would buy it is "to prove to other people that you are a fan of xkcd and a nerd." I think that's true here as well, since on its own the tie is fairly ugly. No humor, just kind of scattered stick figures. Not even any fun colors...this is just to show off that you like xkcd, nothing more at all. xkcd has gone from being a thing that people like because it is good to a think that people like because it is cool to like. And so the merchandise goes from being a good thing on its own to just being a thing that shows the world that you like xkcd.
But my favorite part is that it costs $32. what? Who the fuck wants to spend that much on a goddamn xkcd tie? $19 for a shirt is also pretty expensive but at least that covers your whole chest, and even the top of your arms! This is...this is not so much. Hell, it's twice as much as the awesome 8-Bit ties that Think Geek sells.
NO that's a lie, my favorite part is here:
Did you catch it? Look again!you fucking misspelled "characters". What a god damn idiot you are! Yesterday's comic you misspelled "dysentery," the comic before that you got your whole proof wrong. I've said before that you should get an editor, and you didn't listen, and so I'll say it again - get a fucking editor. Now I know most webcomics don't have them, but most webcomics don't fuck up on a regular basis like you do.
anyway, have fun with your tie, randall. wear it to the webcomic awards show. no one else wants to buy it.
haha two girls lying on their stomachs
ReplyDeletethere is a message there
(perhaps a reference to that movie "This Boy's Life")
ReplyDeleteI will punch anyone wearing this.
ReplyDeletesecond, Anon 4:17
ReplyDeleteFernie and I had a nice discussion about this in the other thread, but I feel I should post a quick summary here too, because it's more relevant:
It's not funny
It's just stick figures.
You are spending 32$ on a tie with random stick figures your son could paint on your tie and you would ground him for a week. Why would anyone encourage this behaviour on the big man child randall? Randall, please stop ruining our ties, the boss will just bitch at me and I will lose my job and then I won't be able to feed my hypothetical children
And even if there was some appeal to what randall draws these days, it's still juts referential. The only people who would wear this, are (as carl pointed out nicely) douchebags who think they gain cool points for spending 32$ on a really ugly tie
It's a silk tie. Standard price for those.
ReplyDeleteNeeds more stick figure cunnilingus.
ReplyDeleteProposal for edit: s/two Girls Lyring On Their Stomachs/Girl Lying On Her Stomach, Another Girl Also Lying On Her Stomach/. Seriously, misinterpreting that scared the hell out of me.
ReplyDeleteAlso, doesn't tab give you a list of linux commands (that are available to you), with ability to filter, without having to hunch over to read it? (Though, being a linux user, 95% of your waking time is probably spent hunched over a computer... Ha, take that, Carl!)
blehh.
ReplyDeleteit wouldn't be so bad if it was pretty. I mean, it may not be the classiest thing ever, but if you're wearing a tie that is "from" something it's totally cool to do so if it actually looks good, still.
this? this is just ugly.
"A thousand formulations of the xkcd empire descend upon you. Our arithmetic will blot out the sun!"
ReplyDeleteThen we shall fight in the shade.
(Randall Munroe = The God-King Xerxes)
Also, even if XKCD was good, you would still look like an asshat if you wore a novelty tie.
ReplyDeleteLet's all get these ties and wear them ironically. That would be cool, right?
I believe the word that was being aimed for was "caricatures" not "characters", and it seems that Google considers that way to be a vaild alternate spelling, even though none of the dictionaries do.
ReplyDeleteMaybe it's a portmanteau of "characters" and "caricatures"?
ReplyDeleteNot that I'm defending xkcd.
laziest. tie. design. ever.
ReplyDeleteif anything, one of his scale of the universe thingies would work much better.
I don't really enjoy going technical and nit-picky when it comes to xkcd criticism, but I'm starting to consider this to be xkcd's "jump the shark" moment. Other than that, I don't have anything to say that others haven't said better.
ReplyDeleteStill, it could be fun to get some white ink and write "sucks" after XKCD.
ReplyDeleteYou wouldn't have to change anything about the tie's design.
Anonymous 10:18 is Randall and is trying to trick his detractions into paying 32 dollars for a tie (that goes straight to him) + shipping.
ReplyDeleteI see past your scam, Randonymonroe.
But "caricatures" wouldn't even make sense. There's nothing being caricatured. Randall's just lazy/an idiot.
ReplyDelete... who makes money.
ReplyDeleteHAHAHAHA.
ReplyDeletehttp://blag.xkcd.com/2009/04/03/omegle/comment-page-14/
Ctrl+F "Carl"
Also:
http://boumbo.toonywood.org/mathetdelire/forum/viewtopic.php?p=44166&sid=9c4c6e35087aaf17b94ec0a954176848
Ctrl+F "Carl"
Could someone please translate?
It seems to be roughly "I like that one, no matter what Carl 'Ugly'* Wheeler says!"
ReplyDelete*paraphrased
Carl, he called you a puisse
ReplyDeleteA *FRENCHMAN* called Carl Wheeleer a pussy.
ReplyDeleteRoflmao
Captcha: Cowwomy
Fail, Carl Wheeler. EPIC. FAIL.
ReplyDeletepeople who say epic fail should be burned alive
ReplyDeletedisregard that i suck cocks
ReplyDeletei'm sorry guys
i guess I'M the real epic fail
I don't like xkcd but god, you are bitter.
ReplyDelete"anyway, have fun with your tie, randall. wear it to the webcomic awards show. no one else wants to buy it."
And didn't anybody noticed that Mr. Hat is on the tie ?
Seriously.
Is it wrong that I recognized the top-left stick-girl as floating, but hated it anyway for being suspended among the other stick figures and thus being just as much a lady crawling?
ReplyDeleteI hate novelty ties.
ReplyDeleteAnd this one is particularly ugly, even.
I don't understand why nerds like to celebrate and pay high money for ugly clothing.
In a way, it's like buying an Abercrombie or whatever shirt that in essence does nothing but advertise the brand across your chest. Though, I hate when people do that too. But at least those shirts aren't as horribly tacky as this tie.
While super-branding shirts are usually not too classy, they at least have attractive design while being a walking billboard.
ReplyDeleteThis tie is more like buying an oversized black t-shirt with Abercrombie written on the front in boring white letters.
Anon from 9:05: Mr. Beret is in, Mr. Hat is not. This can mean either of two things; either Randall decided Mr. Beret > Mr. Hat, or Mr. Beret = Mr. Hat.
ReplyDeleteEssentially, Mr. Beret ≥ Mr. Hat, as per beret ≥ hat. Or something. No matter how I put it, it still sounds awful.
I hate to feed the troll, but isn't Mr. Hat second from the bottom on the right?
ReplyDeleteoff-topic, but another webcomic ended when the creator got tired of the project and it stopped being funny.
ReplyDeleteHas happened to a lot of webcomics, not just one.
ReplyDeletebut randall can't just stop xkcd, it's his living. there is now way in hell he will go back to working a 9-5 just because he lost his edge.
ReplyDeletebut he can just get someone who will review his comics before they go up for free
ReplyDeletehe would probably actually GAIN money
Is that Mr. Hat? I didn't think so but maybe I'm wrong. We don't have a better picture than the one I copied, alas.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, Mr. Hat's trademark headwear is black, and this one is clearly white. i don't care what you say.
Hmm, yes, Tomical on a closer look it seems that is Mr. Hat, and the one on the top is Beret. Dammit, I'm starting to get too prejudiced to think clearly. This sucks, man!
ReplyDeleteCarl, well, it's black on white. I mean, if you're gonna insist on it then I'm sure there's a real Mr. Black somewhere, you just can't see him. Cuz, you know. He's black on black. =p
@Person 1
ReplyDeletei think we all know that the xkcd forum is about as much constructive criticism as he can handle
Holy FUCKING shit that tie is horrible.
ReplyDeleteNow that that's out of the way, Mr. Hat is obviously on the tie. The fact that his hat is white comes from the magic of this being a negative.
WHICH IS ALSO WHAT I AM WITH REGARDS TO THIS TIE LAWL.
Anyway. Again: holy shit. Why not just put a single character there? The science guy holding the beaker, or whatever. Anything other than a randomly strewn about bunch of characters. God!
It' not even scenes from the most legendary XKCD's, either. The first one is just one about a guy sitting down, the guy on chair is from the non-legendary compiling comic, there's one from the giant hamsterball comic which I guess is kinda okay, sorta, and the girl.. I don't even know what the fuck is going on there. Is she vomiting? Did she get beat up? Why the hell would you draw a stick figure that way and put it on a tie? Mr. Hat isn't even doing anything. The couple holding hands is kind of iconic XKCD mushiness, I guess. The last character could only have been shittier if it was just generic guy sitting at his generic desk.
I propose, by the way, that the two ladies on their stomachs are part two in Randalls plan into subliminally enticing women into having sexy sex with him. Step one was constantly mentioning cunnilingus ("Hey ladies, I'm totally there to serve -your- needs, and your needs alone, in the bedroom."), step two is subtle imagery stating "Oh, I also want to blast you in the ass."
Regarding the shirts: remember that awful idea about XKCD Sucks shirts a while back? That's still bad, but for some reason (presumably because I hate the shirt it's based on) I still find that "I'm a douchebag! (Don't talk to me!)" shirt totally hilarious.
I will use that tie to hang myself.
ReplyDeleteFred: I thought it was the guy from the "Choices" preachy story arc.
ReplyDeleteNo, wait, it's the hamster ball guy...nevermind.
ReplyDelete@Asher. Incorrect. On the xkcd forums you get the occasional oddball "i did not love this more than my family. I still loved it a lot, though", which randall really can't handle. He said it himself, he doesn't read the forum
ReplyDeleteYou know guys, I was on the phone with my mother today and I don't know how but somehow we got on the topic of this blog, so I was trying to explain it to her. It was kind of odd hearing myself describe what we do and how randall seems to be incapable of handling even the tiniest bit of criticism. But I also felt kinda stupid for criticizing everything randall munroe does in a group of several people.
I have honestly considered contacting randall and forcing him to read the last guest post. Cause it was really good and fair. The only thing keeping me from doing that is being too damn lazy.
That tie is fucking retarded. If I ever see a dude wearing it, I will strange him in a blatantly non-kinky way.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I wanted to share this with you guys:
http://brightlywound.com
The world is seriously a sad place when xkcd starts inspiring rip-offs (down to the cutesy tagline, even.) Oh, and the author gets pissed off when people compare the two! Isn't that CUTE?
oh, and I finally got off my ass and got a fancy account. wheee.
ReplyDeleteAloria, that comic seriously made me sick to my stomach. It's like the Eragon to xkcd's Star Wars.
ReplyDeleteThis shit is just too much.
lol RSS&M
ReplyDeletebut seriously, what the fuck?
This line from your post making fun of his last shirt has always cracked me up: HEY KIDS, don't you want to be as attractive as this dude or possibly girl?
ReplyDeleteAnon 8:06: man, arithmetic can't blot out the SUN. fucking ridiculous shirts can, though.
aloria, that website was just.... I can't even describe it. Like what the hell, how does the author get pissed off, it's so damn OBVIOUS. (can you provide an example so i may laugh)
and seriously, who the FUCK would by this tie
ReplyDeletecaptcha: aters. we all be 'aters
I think brightlywound.com is the worst comic I ever read. Even Electric Retard is more entertaining.
ReplyDeletefrom brightlywound:
ReplyDeleteIn the event of laughter lasting more than four hours, seek immediate medical help.
yeah seriously, let them check out what the fuck is wrong with you that you would laugh at this shit for four hours
Guys, isn't that brightlywound website an obvious parody? I mean, somebody wouldn't -seriously- get angry at being accused of ripping off XKCD when they have a tagline like that, right?
ReplyDeleteAmanda: The guy getting annoyed at people comparing him to xkcd is on the 'about' page, in case you haven't already seen it.
ReplyDeleteAnd I would feel so much better about life if it's a parody, but something in my gut is telling me it's not. Stay down, waffles, stay down.
man i want to throw up too
ReplyDeletethis is awful
what have you done, randall munroe, what have you done
First of all, Guy With Hat is on the tie. You obviously didn't look hard enough, which is understandable as you just fling your ill-conceived hate around without legitimately looking for a reason to be angry.
ReplyDeleteSecondly: Harping on someone's spelling online is the douchiest thing someone can do. Have YOU proofread your website? You've got a couple mis-spellings yourself.
I would find you much more easy to swallow if you weren't such a gigantic loser as to actually make a hate blog about something that really doesn't affect your life.
You're pathetic.
I do make a ton of mistakes, yes. But keep in mind:
ReplyDelete-I am not a professional, nor am I trying to be.
-When someone points out a mistake I thank them and correct it, and do not try to hide the fact that I made a mistake.
these are the things that make me different from Randall. AND NOTHING ELSE.
"these are the things that make me different from Randall. AND NOTHING ELSE."
ReplyDeletewait... nothing else makes you different from Randall... OMG GUYZE CARL ADMITTED HE IS RANDALL YOU GUYS
captcha: berhab. they tried to make me go to berhab but i said no, no, no?
carl = randall = wmh = rob = amanda = barack obama???
ReplyDeletei am batman.
ReplyDeletePost 60.
ReplyDeleteQED, BITCHES!
May be, charactures is a mix of characters and caricatures :P
ReplyDeletei would think so but eventually he fixed it. He's not that clever.
ReplyDeleteQUOTE: "What a god damn idiot you are!"
ReplyDeleteActually, it should be "damned."
If only you were as smart as you claimed to be, your blog would be worth regular reading. As it stands, I only check back every couple of weeks, to see if you've learned anything.
The answer is still No.
I don't think Carl has ever claimed to be exceedingly intelligent. In addition, both "god damn" and "goddamn" are acceptable terms, as five seconds on Google could have told you.
ReplyDelete(replying to a probable troll but it's Monday afternoon and I've got nothing better to do)
QUOTE: "QUOTE: "What a god damn idiot you are!"
ReplyDeleteActually, it should be "damned."
If only you were as smart as you claimed to be, your blog would be worth regular reading. As it stands, I only check back every couple of weeks, to see if you've learned anything.
The answer is still No."
Actually, it should be "I am a fucking prick who reads xkcdsucks all the time looking for typos I can point out, and pretends to only read it every few weeks. Like, i am a HUGE prick. Huge."
fix'd
well if you really want to be pedantic about it, it should be "god-damned," with a dash and all.
ReplyDeletebut only if you are a huge idiotic prick, which carl already has covered.
successful troll was successful, methinks.
ReplyDeleteI find it hilarious that you find it amusing to designate Randall as deprived of intelligence by constantly nitpicking at his grammar...
ReplyDeleteWhile you and your colleagues manage to misspell something monumentally with almost every post.
Hypocrisy in a can, lovely.
to be fair, he writes about 40 words a week and I write way way more. Also, he is a professional and I am a seven year old who has mistakenly been given internet access. So I don't think it's fair to compare us.
ReplyDeletealso when I make a mistake I admit it, laugh, and correct it, Randall corrects it quickly and pretends it never happened.
So, uh... I understand free speech and all, but do you guys realize that by complaining about his comic strip you drive more traffic to his site, thus (probably) making it more popular because intelligent people with a good sense of humour very much love it? It's been termed the Streisand Effect.
ReplyDeleteThat is all.
except, the only people on this blog are people who already know about XKCD. nobody found out about XKCD through this blog.
ReplyDeletealso, intelligent people with a good sense of humor hate it--this is why it's so popular.
I don't think that anyone who goes to xkcd from this site is going to like it - they've been primed, after all, to think that it sucks. Anyway, it's worth it to know that if Randall looks at his analytics he'll see "xkcdsucks" as a top referrer.
ReplyDelete