First off, if anyone wants to do a guest week or so, send me an e-mail. tons of you have the ability to do this.
SO YEAH SHIRTS. I dunno. People tell me to sell shirts. I have always said "whatever." But then someone told me to sell shirts and I was like "ok, maybe. I'll maybe do that."
Do people want that? You people? Is this blog enough of a thing now that you want it printed on your chest or your back?
Or perhaps, if you do not want something xkcdsucks-specific, we could think of something cynical and hilarious that is sort of in the spirit of the blog, and write that on shirts? I don't know.
So - consider this a threat to debate whether you want me to do this at all (I guess on CafePress, unless you think of something better) and what you'd want it to have. I am open to all suggestions.
So far I thought of:
"xkcd sucks" back: "yeah, that's right, I said it, nerd, xkcd sucks. What are you going to do about it?"
"No one cares what webcomics you read"
"Capitalism: It works, bitches!"
[cast of xkcd characters, all in a big crossed out circle, "xkcd sucks" on the back]
"xkcd sucks: a blog of bile, cynacism, self-righteousness and cuddlefish"
And I got a great suggestions via gchat for a hat with a stick figure on it, and the words, "Randall get off of my head!"
what should I do, guys?
Sunday, July 5, 2009
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Not a huge fan of any of these (except possibly the 'a blog of bile...' one)
ReplyDeleteThey seem a bit too critical -- it requires a special brand of hate that you have to actively work towards to wear a shirt that proclaims your hate of xkcd.
ReplyDeleteI guess what I'm saying is that you will look like a douche if you decide that you hate XKCD readers (already a bit of a niche group among the going outside, t-shirt wearing populace) enough to put it on your shirt, but I'm not a big fan of shurts with wurds on them in the first place.
I do like the "Randall get off my head" idea, however.
"Capitalism: It works, bitches!" was my favorite, but i think the idea is not the best. I thought the idea of the blog isn't to just say "xkcd sucks!" just to be different from the crowd, but to critique each comic. I guess what im saying is, if you're going to do a shirt, please make it subtle or clever!
ReplyDeleteI cant believe anon2 and i both used the phrase "I guess what I'm saying is". random...
ReplyDeleteI'd be embarrassed to wear any kind of shirt like that in public.
ReplyDeleteI figure people mostly wear webcomic T-shirts in the desperate hope that someone will recognise it and sleep with them. For that reason, I like the simple but effective 'xkcd sucks' shirt. Yeah, I've seen your webcomic. It sucks.
ReplyDeleteRealistically, though, I wouldn't actually buy it.
A vertical list of infamous criminals.
ReplyDeleteEach line is the name of a criminal, along with the year he began his career.
It finishes with "Randall Munroe 2005".
Underwear with stick figures having cunnilingus?
ReplyDeleteOh yes I went there.
" XKCD
ReplyDeleteMORE LIKE
SEX-K-SUCKS-DICK "
How about:
ReplyDelete"If you don't like this shirt, just don't read it!"
1) Some reference to Megan...
ReplyDelete2) A parody of a "My Hobby" comic:
Cunnilingus, acting like an emo douchebag, Megan, acting pretentious about the latest Wikipedia article I read, cunnilingus, reminding you that I'm "in" on the latest meme, SEXKCD, cunnilingus, pretending I'm don't just draw shitty webcomics, getting in your head, cunnilingus, acting like pseudointellect and sharing my "wisdom", etc.
3) Used expanded version of above (throw in more repeats and loop), and create something like this using the wall of text:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/6e7e/?cpg=ab
4) Some sort of graph plotting XKCD in some way.
5) Parody comic including aspects of several stereotypical "xkcd sucks" model comics.
^^^^^
ReplyDelete1:02 anon here
3) Spelling XKCD.
T-shirts seem like a diffucult medium for conveying an argument. So I'd say your best bet would be to be pro-xkcd-sucks without being too much anti-xkcd. Otherwise you look like a jerk. "Blog of bile" seems best in that regard.
ReplyDeleteOf course, if you go negative, you can be saved by being hilarious.
Jumping the shark?
ReplyDeleteThe only one that I think is sufficiently general to be amusing, and sufficiently incisive to make a statement was
"No one cares what webcomics you read"
It's a great corrective to the glut of "clever"-slash-"I'm in the cyber-in-crowd" tees.
No, most of these are just lame. The only thing those shirts convey is that you hate XKCD, and that would just invite people to go "Oh you just hate it because it's popular". The good thing about this blog is that people overly dissect every comic and criticize every aspect, and you can't convey that in a shirt.
ReplyDeleteThe only ones I like are the "Nobody cares" ones and the hat. Although I suppose that could be interpreted by people as a sign that you like XKCD and, horror of horrors, are a forum regular.
I think there should be something vague, that you'd only get if you also followed this blog. Some weird reference to Megan, or something. If they didn't make you look like a douchebag when viewed out of context, I'd also like a shirt that simply said "Do me without a condom", "stupid uterus" or "Constant novelty saps my initiative."
Hey, how about a shirt that simply says "(Mal from Firefly)"?
navy blue shirt, white letters
ReplyDeletefront, top right "pocket area," smallish letters: xkcd
(all the xkcd fans come up to you and are like "MAN i like that comic too, you must be borderline genius as well if you like that comic, let's be friends")
back, middle, large letters: SUCKS
underneath, small letters: .blogspot.com
bottom, tiny letters (credit to Ch00f): If you don't like this shirt, just don't read it!
Perhaps an xkcd-stick-figure with a chart of comic quality on the front, and "It's not that funny." in Humour Sans across the back?
ReplyDeleteI just want one with Cuddlefish Prime on it. either written or drawn.
ReplyDeleteeither that or malethoth's hat man erotica fan art. that shit was gold.
Hahahaha you pathetic fucking douchebags.
ReplyDeleteSeriously the only thing lamer than wearing a webcomiv t
shirt is wearing a shirt that hates on a webcomic.
Seriously if you are willing to PAY MONEY to tell strangers
you dislike some website they've never heard of...just kill
yourself you worthless piece of shit. Ugh.
"No one cares what webcomic you read" is the only thing I consider clever there. I mean, hating xkcd is "COOL" now? To the point where you want to show it off in the street? Pfah. I think "xkcdsuckssucks.blogspot.com" is getting nearer and nearer.
ReplyDeleteThough it would be funny to have something absurd and slightly critical, such as "Randall, get out of my lung!", or "Randall, get your anus out of my penis!" or something.
I don't think I'd buy any shirts from this site unless they took something about this website and generalized it into a nice shirt. Like "Capitalism: It works, bitches!" or "If you don't like this shirt, just don't read it!" or maybe some visual of cuddlefish if done right.
ReplyDeleteHaha, you are trying to sell shirts. You've become the very thing you set out to criticize. Soon you'll be quitting your day job and moving to Boston to sleep with the other half of the MIT campus that dislikes xkcd.
ReplyDeleteI love the idea of "Do me without a condom" t-shirt.
ReplyDeleteAlso: "Aww, what an adorable stuffed giraffe!"
captcha: fooding - one of the sex fetishes not yet discussed in xkcd
@Cdlfish 7:35
ReplyDeleteOK, I admit it, I laughed.
On an unrelated note, I think the reason Randall keeps putting humor-breaking lines at the end of every comic is because his preferred style leaves him with characters hardly capable of expressing themselves without talking.
But why would they need to express themselves AFTER THE PUNCHLINE? I mean, even if it wasn't text and the characters had detailed faces: would the joke be better if the comic ended with a panel of a guy smirking after the punchline?
ReplyDeleteI hate the idea of xkcd sucks shirts, especially shirts that are just text. Though I like the idea in theory of "if you don't like this shirt, don't read it".
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile, 606 is up.
It's bad, of course. It's one of those typical "observation minus the humor" xkcds. Even worse, we've got meme humor! Yes, the intended joke is referencing old memes in the future. For one, hasn't there been at least one xkcd with the exact same idea as the intended punchline? Maybe with rickrolling instead. For two, it's still not funny at all.
OLD MEMES ARE NOT FUNNY RANDALL.
Also, Portal came out in 2007. So I wonder if "early 2013" will turn into "late 2012" sometime. Granted, it was in like Nov 2007, but Portal takes like two hours to beat.
I'd buy the "No one cares what webcomics you read" shirt, or one that simply says "xkcd sucks". I like to invite controversy, and, sadly, a large number of students at my college like xkcd. I will gladly piss them off and challenge them to try and defend it.
ReplyDeleteJust the word "snark" on a shirt. Or "snarky blogger."
ReplyDeleteGoldstein: sorry that is my job. Did you know that hating XKCD makes you fascinating in the Cambridge area?
ReplyDeleteAttention gentleman! Lend me your ears.
ReplyDeleteIt is I, William Monty Hughes! I bring with me good tithings for all! All rational-minded people, anyway.
I have pondered long and hard. "How must I overthrow Carl "Ugly" Wheeler and his sycophantic mentally challenged minions?".
Then, I knew. It came to me, suddenly. A stroke of inspiration! I had the solution. I was elated! I knew how to defeat Carl once and for all! To protect the great Randall Munroe from Lucifer himself! I was given this task to enforce, it is a privilege and I am... overwhelmed with emotions that this infinite, beautiful universe picked ME, and ME along to carry out its will.
I was instructed by THE COSMOS ITSELF to create a counter-blog. A marvelous, wonderful awe-inspiring counter-blog.
One to praise xkcd.
I was told that my immense affection for Randall would nullify Carl Wheeler's loathing of him.
As I am a far more cerebral individual than Mr. Wheeler (who has a lowly IQ of 7), I am DESTINED to emerge victorious. Are You Listening To Me, Carl?! I WILL WIN!!
I WILL WIN!!!!
http://xkcdisaparagonofhilarity.blogspot.com/
READ IT AND WEEP YOU NASTY LITTLE NERDS
(Content will be added at a later date)
-William Monty Hughes
IQ 224
"Cogito Ergo Sum"
I would buy some fabric paint that says on it "Fabric paint. Use only on fabric. Machine washable. Jet green."
ReplyDeleteThen I would use it to paint some fabric.
"Maybe if my webcomic is popular enough
ReplyDeletemegan will finally love me"
How's everyone doing?
Since XKCD is under an attribution-noncommercial license, copy-pasting a comic onto a purchaseable shirt which you then crossed out might be a Thing? If Randall (or a Loyal Reader) deigns to acknowledge this blog and the (probably small) revenue such a shirt would produce.
ReplyDeleteI'd laugh to see the hat, but I wouldn't buy it.
The others don't really strike me as all that funny :(
No.
ReplyDeleteyou guys if i could somehow draw a cuttlefish cuddling someone without making it look like that someone was being killed would you buy it
ReplyDeleteother than that I'm with the crowd that says maybe we shouldn't buy tees that invite nerds to throw their lolcats at us and hiss at us in python
actually I really like Rehoboam's suggestion ("Maybe if my webcomic is popular enough megan will finally love me")
Have a bunch of math stuff, like the digits of pi, graphs, random equations, and in big bold letters:
ReplyDeleteTHIS IS FUNNY
HA HA HA
then in smaller print
(xkcd sucks)
"OLD MEMES ARE NOT FUNNY RANDALL."
ReplyDeleteWhy are you making THE EXACT SAME POINT the strip is making?
(I still find it a very dull and lame strip, though)
No. I don't want to wear a shirt about some guy's blog about some guy's webcomic. It's excessively trivial.
ReplyDelete@Fernie:
ReplyDeleteBecause he's again going back to memes for humor. It doesn't matter whether he's saying they're funny or not funny, using old memes as a punchline in any way is not funny. This isn't 4chan.
Also, there's something hilarious about the comic talking about old memes as being lame when that's basically one of the four pillars of xkcd. Next he'll say that sex jokes are lame.
He already has.
ReplyDeleteHow about the front being a stickman going over a shark on a unicycle, then the back saying "xkcd post 400".
ReplyDeleteHaha, wow. I honestly did not remember that one.
ReplyDeleteAnd what's more, Randall makes a penis joke five strips later in 199.
Randall was criticizing old memes back in 16. It haunts me whenever I see a hyphen moved one word to the right.
ReplyDeleteNot that I'm free from it. I end fortune cookies with "except in bed" these days.
As for shirts, I like the cuddlefish ideas the best. I was going to suggest, "I'm a cuddlefish (you can cuddle me)" like the xkcd shirt, or maybe ending with "(free cuddles)" like those free hugs people, but I'd fear it would lead to inappropriate cuddling. I'm also picturing a creature that is various combinations of a cuddlefish, Optimus Prime, and Cthulhu. Or maybe a cuddlefish cuddling Cthulhu? Awww...
how about a shirt with the panel from the megan parody comic that says: look we're holding hands Megan look
ReplyDeletethat is my favorite panel
ReplyDeleteI would go for a shirt that just says XKCD sucks, and nothing else. It would be a great conversation starter.
ReplyDeleteThe only thing worse than an xkcd shirt is a CAD shirt.
ReplyDeleteThe only thing worse than an xkcd and a CAD shirt together is an xkcdsucks shirt
A witty phrase: go for it!
ReplyDeleteDrawing attention to hating xkcd: Nooooo
I'm a usually sympathetic lurker on this blog, but I was inspired to comment on this because it's such a fundamentally bad idea.
ReplyDeleteT-shirts bearing "insider" jokes like these are the clothing equivalents of xkcd itself: aesthetically unattractive and bewilderingly unfunny to anyone except a select few. They are worn, despite being lumpy and formless and inevitably a size too large, with the desperate hope of attracting a knowing wink or chuckle from another pathetic lost soul
Anyone wearing this shirt is no better than an XKCD fan (likewise lumpy and formless) who slyly drops an XKCD reference into regular conversation, hoping to make an impression that, due to his social sortcomings, he could otherwise only dream about
That said, "No one cares what webcomics you read" isn't too bad
ReplyDeleteObjection.
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing worse than a CAD shirt.
This is a terrible idea.
ReplyDeleteI'm with Anon 11:53
ReplyDeleteIf there was a "No one cares what webcomics you read" in a good style though I would buy it because it is a fundamentally true assertation.
Yeah, not really interested. It seems like it might just be better for everyone who wants one to take some spray paint to a normal XKCD t-shirt.
ReplyDelete"Anyone wearing this shirt is no better than an XKCD fan (likewise lumpy and formless) who slyly drops an XKCD reference into regular conversation, hoping to make an impression that, due to his social sortcomings, he could otherwise only dream about"
ReplyDeleteIn other words: "Guys! Stop having fun!"
I would buy "If you don't like this shirt, just don't read it", if you decide not to make it I might make my own. It's ironic enough that you won't seem like a douche for wearing an inside joke, but if someone happens to read this blog it's just that much funnier.
ReplyDelete"SLEEP WITH ME MEGAN, YOU BITCH" the t-shirt.
ReplyDeletethere ought to be a Cuddlefish shirt
ReplyDelete(captcha: prinses)
i think cuddlefish shirts would be vague enough that people who don't read xkcdsucks will get it. they will think you are weird but they will get it and go "ha"
ReplyDeleteThe only decent idea for a shirt is the "Capitalism" shirt. The other ones are waaaay too obscure.
ReplyDeleteCrandall is just trying to double his income by feeding off by both sides of the xkcd divide.
ReplyDeleteShirts are a terrible idea. Just mock this terrible abomination of a comic strip.
ReplyDeleteThose are extra things to add to my list of "things which I can't really be fucked to buy".
ReplyDeleteStart selling xkcdsucks: The Flamethrower, and I'll get back to you.
I like the hat idea and Rehoboam's shirt, but there is basically no chance I would wear one in public. I am kind of envying Rob here.
ReplyDeleteI think that there are a lot of my friends that would agree with a lot of what is written in this blog, but if they saw someone with a shirt saying "xkcd sucks" they would probably punch them in the face.
ReplyDeleteThe thesis of this blog is not "xkcd sucks," but "xkcd in its current state is pretty frigging mediocre which is frustrating inasmuch as the first several hundred comics were absolute gold."
I'd wear an xkcdsucks shirt if it made it abundantly clear that despite my hatred for the current state of the comic, I really loved the first several hundred strips. For example, "Remember when xkcd didn't suck?"
Ooooh I like that latest suggestion.
ReplyDelete3rd the 11:53 anon
ReplyDeletelike the 'Capitalism' one.
perhaps have on the front something that says 'I know! I'll make a line of shirts for a niche market on the internet!' and have an xk style stickfigure surrounded by boxes of shirts and then on the back have the 'Capitalism; it works, bitches.'?
thus would still maintain a jab at randall.. while also being a self-parody! 'kidding on the square', as it were. meta-humour whatnot. thus justifying this franchise as well! um.. yeah..
…Wow, so you go to such effort to criticize this guy's humor, but can't design halfway decent t-shirt slogans?
ReplyDeletethere are no good t-shirt slogans in the world.
ReplyDeleteI think this is a good time to say that all of xkcd's shirts and other merchandise are absolutely awful. They're also oddly expensive. $10 for 7 preprinted buttons?
ReplyDeleteSome of the posters are OK though.
Don't forget his Radiohead-style prints - pay as much or as little as Randall wants you to pay!
ReplyDeleteHA. That's awesome. "Listen, you guys can pay as much as you want, because I totally thought Radiohead rocked too when they did that, right? Wait, what? They let you get away with paying nothing? FUCK THAT FIFTEEN DOLLARS"
ReplyDeleteEven back when I liked xkcd, I remember thinking the description for that "just shy" t-shirt was one of the lamest things ever written on the internet.
ReplyDeleteSee Carl? This is what you get for cultivating a community of cynics and haters. No opportunities for commercial exploitation.
ReplyDeleteThe description for that "just shy" shirt was always pretty lame, but I've always, -always- hated that "(You can talk to me!)" line, even back when XKCD was great.
ReplyDeletenone of those were funny.
ReplyDelete:S
Check your spelling before you make the shirts, though! "Cynicism".
ReplyDeleteUh, no. Don't. The thing about these shirts is that I don't think there's a ton of material from this blog to work from that inspire T-shirt material.
ReplyDeleteIf you can come up with some more worthy shirt ideas then go for it. But don't make a shirt just so you can say you made one.
Why buy a shirt just to show that you dislike something? You can just, you know, go around disliking it. Just like how most xkcd fans go around liking xkcd without wearing the shirts.
ReplyDeleteyou are aware Randy makes his money off shirt sales, right?
ReplyDelete