Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Comics 961-962: So Boring I Forgot To Post

Hahaha, just kidding, I'm just a lazy fuck and was playing computer games.

961. Rumor has it Randy planned on posting another Friday comic in addition to this specific Steve Jobs-related comic. It's a tribute, it doesn't really do much for me. I found the forums on this one kind of amusing in a sad way, but it's very possible that's just me.

962. This one's also pretty boring. I'm just going to comment on the alt text, which seems to imply that 'flight' and 'math' are mutually exclusive. I wonder if Randy knows that flight instruction is actually a pretty math-intensive field? I mean, yes, joke blah blah not intended to be taken seriously etc etc but really. This is a comic where the fanboys constantly praise its creator for his attention to detail (and conveniently forget about his attention to detail every time he completely fails to pay attention to detail).

This also seems weirdly anti-nerd, which is weird since Randy loves pandering almost as much as he loves Megan's delicious milky nipples. "It's impossible to focus on nerdy things when you could be out doing something exciting," says the alt text. I've no doubt Randy's fanboys are eating it up, but still. I don't think I've ever seen such blatantly anti-nerd content on XKCD. This seems telling.

111 comments:

  1. In honor of Steve Jobs, we will not be posting in this xkcdsucks comment thread. Thank you for your cooperation and support.

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  2. Randy's intense self-loathing is catching up with him. He probably feels responsible for the cancer.

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  3. I just want to reiterate that Rob is extremely lazy and fat.

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  4. Don't deny your life's a living hell. You're a shadow of your own self.

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  5. Raven no one wants to read your shitty poetry. Post that garbage somewhere else.

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  6. I like how Rob complains about Randall being a few hours late when he ends up being days late. I EXPECT MORE OBSESSIVENESS FROM YOU ROB!

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  7. Weak Rob...

    Do you know what 'avian' actually means? Do you know what anything outside of that little computer game world of yours looks like?

    Your criticisms are getting super lame...time for a new hobby

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  8. i have never complained that randy posted late. if anything i cheered on the signs that he was flagging in his devotion to his shitty webcomic

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  9. I just want to reiterate that I feel bad about myself :(

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  10. In before Gamer2k4 plugs his blag.

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  11. this post was really shitty. your purpose is supposed to be to oppose my let-down when xkcd sucks, but when you suck worse than xkcd then why should i even bother to let you continue? why must you Randallize my feelings like this.

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  12. c==3
    hey rob
    hey rob
    it's your dick
    life size
    burrrrrrrrrrn

    also birds don't have planes, fuckhead

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  13. that half assed steve jobs tribute was horrible, and you're a horrible person if you liked it. besides, how self-righteous can a person be to deify some corporate tyrant they've never met before? This whole "RIP steve" thing is retarded.

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  14. 10:47, you heartless bastard, Steve was Cupertino's Rose. Without Him we would still be running DOS on IBM PCs. Why do you hate success?

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  15. What the fuck is this shit? The comments for the previous article were just starting to get good.

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  16. Exactly, 1:44, we can't let that happen here. Then people might actually derive enjoyment out of the existence of xkcdsucks, which indirectly means that people would be deriving enjoyment because xkcd exists. This must never happen.

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  17. 10:46 - an avian society would have planes, if they weren't all retards like you.

    buuuuuurrrrrrnnnnnn

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  18. xkcdsucks, I hate my life, what should I do? You are the only reliable source of advice I have.

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  19. 963, obvious goomhrbait. Not that the comment it makes is invalid, but like a comic pointing out that the sky is blue, there's no need for it and I doubt it would get so much as a chuckle from most people nowadays.

    can we change resolutions without restarting the X server yet? can we mom?

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  20. Randy is implying he is actually using a Linux, despite overwhelming evidence that he has a macbook.

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  21. He obviously installed Linux on his Mac, duh.

    That or he's a fraud. But that can't be right.

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  22. He could just be using an X server on MacOS. I use an X server despite the fact that I run Windows 7 so that I can forward X clients to it while SSHing into a *nix machine.

    .. or, more likely, he just pulled something vaguely lunixy out of his ass for the comic because he knew readers would respond well to it, even though it's not a particularly timely or clever reference.

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  23. I'm not saying that anyone who hates hip-hop is racist. Some people are turned off by the genre's rampant misogyny and homophobia, and that's fine! And even ignoring that, it's perfectly acceptable to just not be a fan of a genre. No one likes everything.

    But when people start jabbering about how it's not real music (which, I've never gotten a coherent definition of music out of these people that actually excludes hip-hop), or sneer about how wearing one's baseball cap is a sign of low intelligence, I can't help but think of these people as kinda racist.

    So, in conclusion, Ayn Rand was a horrible person and I'm glad she's dead.

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  24. I think you are on the wrong blog anon.

    GOOMHR I have read about Linux on Wikipedia too.

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  25. Also, what kind of bourgeois asshole has two monitors?

    Randallism yay http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Xorg.conf&action=historysubmit&diff=455168008&oldid=455166311

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  26. I agree with 4:28. It's good to see people of actual intelligence on this blog.

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  27. Also, inb4 racist/samefag comment.

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  28. Dicksmash McIroncockOctober 12, 2011 at 6:35 AM

    5:48 = 5:49 = racist samefag

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  29. I thought 962 was more a "Man, my life sucks because I can't fly and am stuck doing calculus."

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  30. You know, we as as society are perfectly good with portraying Hitler as cartoonishly evil. And that's fine. He deserves that. And even with Stalin, people take it for granted that he was an evil dictator (which he was), at least in America.

    But what about Mao? That guy believed that you were a better person the more people you killed, and praised Hitler accordingly. When he was compared to Qin Shi Huang, the first emperor of China, who was rather infamous for killing anyone who disagreed with him, his response was to boast that he had killed over forty thousand people, while Qin Shi Huang had only killed, like, five hundred. He literally bragged about being more homicidal than other homicidal dictators. That's like, one step removed from dressing all in black and cackling and twirling your mustache in your spare time.

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  31. If 6:41 is 4:28, then they are on a roll. Please continue with your insights.

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  32. I'll suck your cock if you visit my blog. Please.

    I'll suck it even if you will not visit. Please.

    I just need your sperm inside me so bad. Please.

    I haven't gotten any since my uncle died. Please.

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  33. Only 37 comics until number 1000. I can't wait!

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  34. But that's 3 months from now! You might as well be tensely anticipating Stephen Fucking Moffat granting us another episode of Doctor Who.

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  35. And oh no someone on Wikipedia is mad at me "It's not vandalism just because you don't think it's relevant, you worthless deletionist data-murdering scum." Q_Q

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  36. There, there, 9:09. The people who matter love you for it.

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  37. Although I can't be bothered digging up the actual quotation, Mugabe has compared himself favorably to Hitler (as in, he said that he and Hitler share positive qualities)

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  38. "This Hitler has only one objective: justice for his people, sovereignty for his people, recognition of the independence of his people and their rights over their resources… If that is Hitler, then let me be a Hitler tenfold."

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  39. Did you guys hear about the Iranian actress sentenced to be lashed and imprisoned for starring in a movie with her head shaved?

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  40. Randall is like Hitler in so far as neither is very good at art. Hitler didn't have the internet, however.

    THERE BUT BY THE GRACE OF GOD

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  41. Hitler was actually a mediocre-to-decent artist, and might have been OK if he had gotten into school, but he didn't get in because his work was boring old representational stuff in a time when surrealism, cubism, and dadaism were popular. Which was why he came down on those sort of artists so hard when he took over Germany.

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  42. Up yours, 1:48, everybody can see through your inept impersonation. I'm very up to date on social issues.

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  43. Seriously, though, I have no fucking clue what's going on.

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  44. The Real Anonymous 1:47October 12, 2011 at 3:07 PM

    Outrageous!

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  45. I just wish that people didn't have to spew hate so much. About anything. But thats what the internet is for I suppose. So people like us can vent our pathetic little qualms in an enviroment where negative results for their comments is almost nonexistent. So keep up the Blag rob! Because nobody can do a fucking thing!

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  46. What. I hope they're trolling... Please let them be trolling.

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  47. I wish Chris Chan would hurry up and make some more videos.

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  48. Anon 2:30, then... the Holocaust was the art world's fault. A genocide of such scale and smoothness simply could not have been orchestrated by industrial efficiency alone. It takes the imagination of a genius...

    Oh no... oh no.

    Do you realize what this means???

    SALVADOR DALI DID 9/11.

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  49. We should add a tab to the xkcd Wikipedia entry about strips which have been edited without comment. They're historic incidents.

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  50. @2:30, this is like Thatcher being rejected for Oxford until another candidate withdrew, her response being to destroy the whole secondary and higher education systems in Great Britain.

    Unlike Britain, Germany rebuilt itself.

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  51. Good fuck, I'm sick of hearing Rob talk about Megan lactating. Randy mentioned that in one, maybe 2 of his comics if I missed one.

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  52. Learn to read between the lines. All of the comics are about lactation.

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  53. british fag who keeps talking about british political shit no one cares aboutOctober 13, 2011 at 6:39 AM

    im gay

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  54. It might have only come up explicitly like twice but damn if those two times didn't have implications.

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  55. We should add a tab to the xkcd Wikipedia entry about Wikipedia articles which have been falsely edited by xkcd fans. They're historic incidents.

    But I bet the anal retentive anal fissures and deletionist scum will rain on our parade by erasing it from existence.

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  56. IIRC There's an article somewhere on Wikipedia about notable people who have either vandalized Wikipedia or encouraged it to be vandalized, like Stephen Colbert. Not sure if it mentions XKCD though.

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  57. I will NOT be making ANY further videos in The Mean Time, Anon 12:08, due to recent finacial difficulties.

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  58. I have absolutely no idea what a xorg.conf is but that sure is one bland looking graph with no real humour in it.

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  59. Kinda of like the average xkcd.

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  60. Btw, CWCSonichu, will you please release more nudes?

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  61. Kate Beckinsale nudes, preferably.

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  62. We can go on all day about what if Hitler didn't take over, but honestly I don't think it would've done that much good. Antisemitism was pretty ingrained in German culture since the 1800s. Hitler didn't invent the Stab-in-the-back legend. Sure, Hitler was great at manipulating emotions, but I'm not really convinced that his absence would mean the Nazis didn't take over. Hell, for all we know, it might have made things worse. Hitler was overall pretty bad at actually running a country: he made policy decisions based on divination and was so devoted to Social Darwinism he encouraged interdepartmental squabbles, thinking that whichever organization got the other dismantled and its members thrown into camps would obviously do a better job. For all we know, if Hitler hadn't been around somebody who was actually competent might have taken over. Of course, this all goes out the window when you realize that any change to the past can have massive unforeseen side effects, in which case there's really no point in speculating because literally at that point anything is possible, including alien dinosaur takeover.

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  63. Your commentary is becoming washed out Rob, why i have half a mind to make a blog about it and call it XKCDsucks-sucks.blogspot.com

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  64. Rob = an organism that breaks down a good substance until it is indefinable from shit

    A Big Stinky Butt = an organism that breaks down a good substance until it is indefinable from shit

    Therefore: Rob = a Big Stinky Butt

    QED

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  65. @7:01: Congratulations, you've just described the competitive target civil service culture of Blairite Britain.

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  66. It's 10pm at night and you're walking home down a deserted street. You see three black youths walking toward you.

    I'm not racist but is there anyone here who would not cross the street? Just to be on the safe side.

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  67. Hulk not racist, but why Germans such assholes?

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  68. I'm not racist but if there are only 15 million Jews in the world and 7 billion humans then why are there so many Jews in US government and US media?

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  69. "I'm not racist but if there are only 15 million Jews in the world and 7 billion humans then why are there so many Jews in US government and US media?"
    because they make more of an effort than most of you lazy american cunts?

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  70. I'm not racist, but I do like to attend the occasional lynching for the ambience.

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  71. Well actually 11:48, you are AT LEAST somewhat racist, since according to your post you made a value judgment on a persons character based on the color of their skin. Would I do the same thing and cross the street? Yes probably, but I would regardless of their race considering that youths in groups at night are known for causing QUITE a ruckus. If I saw a small group of asians/latinos/africans/innuits/norweigans walking my direction, I would most likely still cross the street.

    I usually don't respond to people on the interwebs, but it is really quite irritating to me when people say "I'm not racist, BUT...[racist comment]". Comments like that almost irritate me more than those from people who are openly racist; at least they dont have some false sense superiority and sense of right-ness. Proceed to troll me if you wish, xkcdsucks community.

    (Also: KILLER comment 2:23 ;D)

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  72. HEY RANDALL I OWN DARK SIDE OF THE MOON ON CD TOO http://pinkfloydarchives.com/Discog/UK/LP/DSOTM/DSOTM1/BC.jpg And I'm quite certain that is INCORRECT PHYSICS, RANDALL

    At least nobody will vandalize the DSOTM wikipedia article for this one.

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  73. CD? I own Dark Side of the Moon on vinyl, because I am a person of sophistication and taste.

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  74. awful perspective but that goes without saying

    "A Big Stinky Butt = an organism that breaks down a good substance until it is indefinable from shit"

    what am i reading

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  75. @2:40

    It's not racism; it's called conditioning. If a group of black kids are statistically more likely to be up to no good than white kids (and they are—just watch Bait Car some time and tell me how many white people steal the car), then it's wise to avoid the risk. It's not like you have to come back later and hit them with your car, though I wouldn't be opposed to that either.

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  76. http://i.imgur.com/iibyh.png
    it's my first time you guys, be gentle with me

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  77. I'm not racist, but I think the lack of Negro hangings lately is a sign of the destruction of the moral fabric of our society.

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  78. http://i.imgur.com/jdWsO.png
    http://i.imgur.com/6tr7G.png

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  79. Anon@6:26. I'm pretty sure that's much better than the original (assuming I'm intepreting it correctly). Your joke is that the DSotM posters is one of the most ubiquitous dorm room posters, and the room ended up with two copies of the same poster, right? Awesome. There definately is a set of posters that will be found in at least one room on any given dorm floor (some others: Bob Marley smoking, Persistance of Memory, Starry Night, some Escher tesselation, Belushi in "College" sweatshirt)

    Delete the 4th and maybe the 5th panel if that's what you're going for. It's a little confusing to have the new roommate stop to ponder, leave, and still come back with the extraneous poster.

    Ha, ha, Randall. Literally nobody is buying CDs. Step out of your bubble for a moment. CDs are in trouble, and sales are way down, but they're not all going to the landfill. Older folks (50+) are still buying CDs. 1/3 of Americans still don't have broadband internet (and some of those don't even own a computer). They're not downloading their music.

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  80. Guys, who would win a fight between Dirty Harry and Voldemort?

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  81. Dirty Harry. By the time Voldemort gets to the second syllable of a curse, his head would be blown clean off.

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  82. Anon7:34: yeah, but they're the 1/3 of Americans who don't matter. I bet they don't even read xkcd!

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  83. that is a general assumption with no factual backing, who is to say that the 1/3 cannot find a means to read XKCD as it is a popular comic and can appeal to more then just programmers or computer types. so saying that 33.3% of Americans are irrelevant because they might not read the comic is a moot point

    and on the topic of cd's i can honestly say that a majority of my friends would prefer to own an item of media, beit music, art, or video, in hard copy like a cd or record

    also the real question is not between dirty harry and a villain but rather who would win between dirty harry and his emotions

    in conclusion my penis is the biggest so you can all put down the ruler

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  84. I want to know who'd win a fight between By-tor and Samson.

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  85. This is fantastic, you guys:
    Can you notice the alteration Randy made to the original comic?
    Compare with the original panel 2 from anon 6:26 or R. Hint: it's about the guy on the left, and the rationale behind it is absolutely perplexing.

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  86. I think there's a mistake in the second poster.

    After the lens, the seperated beam is now converging, with purple at the bottom. The second prism bends all the light upwards, but same as the first prism bends purple light more (unless made of some exotic material that doesn't behave optically like glass). This means that the purple light would end up travelling up lots, and the red light would end up travelling up much less. The second prism would actually diverge the light more, but angle the centre of the beam upwards.

    What is needed is the second prism to be base down so it sends the light downwards and puts it back to collimated white light.
    Or you need to have two lenses, one to focus the light the other placed after the focus when the light is swapped over (red and purple) to make it slightly converging again. Then you can put the prism that way up and have it re-collimate the white light.

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  87. @Anon 11:00:
    You must be mistaken ,since Randall himself said he doesn't get do-overs.

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  88. ..glasses? He edited the comic to add fucking glasses? WHY?

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  89. And a goatie. Don't forget the goatie. I said it was perplexing, dude.

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  90. the lens in the new comic is superfluous, and would actually cause problems. Either two prisms, or two prisims with a lens pair in between.

    aside- this kind of setup is used for compensating for dispersion in pulsed lasers.

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  91. See, I knew exactly how trite and cliche the Dark Side of the Moon poster is, which is why I got the concert poster for The Wall in West Berlin (with "Mother Should I Trust The Government" on the wall, natch).

    'Scuse me while I finish sucking my own dick

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  92. Yo R., I took the liberty to improve upon your work:
    http://i.imgur.com/fJzO9.png
    Captcha:porkspod. funnier than the last 400 or so xkcd's combined

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  93. xkcd encourages the spread of hiv :(

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  94. Randall's insight into the music industry is flawless.

    GOOMHR

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  95. Too bad Randall didn't finish that album. He would have been all:

    Is it "kwark" or "kwork," babe, you tell me,
    In the dark this dork continues to be.
    The word either way feels just like silk,
    Like a freshly squeezed glass of tasty milk.
    Check Wikipede to recall the full range:
    Up, down, charm, bottom, top and strange.
    Oh, "kwork" or "kwark," babe, I don't care,
    This dork is stark raving mad for your pair.

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  96. Hey, why hasn't Randall made a comic about sexual positions based on quark categories, or "flavors" to those who have researched the topic on Wikipedia? Somebody needs to email him to do it.

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  97. Anon218, they have only recently entered popular culture -- give him 5-10 years.

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  98. Yeah, Rob just doesn't give a fuck anymore. He's like a shitty Carl.

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  99. So... what are the chances of Randall doing a comic about the death of Dennis Ritchie (you know, a guy who *actually* invented stuff that's used or provided the foundation for what is used by nearly every programmer today)?

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  100. Is it me, or is Randall trying to relive college days and yet at the same time, reviling them?

    It's probably just me, and this cup of coffee made from grains that are really to old. (lol, chemical induced weirdness reference GOOMH me!)

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  101. @Alex: part of the geek college experience is revulsion. This is what media has taught me. So to truly relive it, he must revile it (I love that juxtaposition BTW, ty ty. God DAMN).

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  102. I hate the word juxtaposition so much. It seems I only started hearing it frequently when I took literature classes with a bunch of snobs who insisted on using it because they saw it in their Word-of-the-Day App or something. Nothing the had to say with it wasn't completely obvious and/or inane, so it seemed like they were just structuring a sentence in which they could use "juxtapose" or "juxtaposition" to sound intelligent.

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  103. i think it's a great word and use it at every possible opportunity

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