1229. Jokes about the starfield screensaver that has been with Windows since at least Windows 3.1 are totally novel, Randy! Well done! A+
1230. I have literally never even considered the possibility that someone might make a joke about the shape of a graph! This is a true stroke of genius! A+
1231. Hahaha! It would be extremely hilarious if someone were to do this in real life! Does this man's imagination (and the attendant comic genius) know no bounds? A+
1232. This one kind of sucks. F
Sunday, June 30, 2013
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It's going to be okay, no one will hurt you here.
ReplyDeletei have waited my whole life for this moment
ReplyDelete<3
ReplyDeleteMarry me?
DeleteI have just taken a shit as a function of time, then posted this comment as a function of time.
ReplyDeleteI just looked at my watch as a function of time.
ReplyDeleteI lol'd. Those sincere reviews are good.
ReplyDeleteYo dawg! I heard you like irony...
Deleteeumespoop
Deleteits you
you are eumespoop
10:43 am
DeleteImagine this scenario: I'm wearing the skinned face of your father as a mask. I penetrate my black mamba into the rectum of your mother's corpse and pound until it is covered in feces and blood and then I shove it down your throat while you're hopelessly wiggling against the ropes, you want to scream yet you can't even breathe; I cum like a horse. You drown and die, yet not before your petite mort.
so i imagined that
Deletenow what
That's it.
Deletealright
Delete1232 is the most embarassing attempt at making a point in the form of a joke I've ever seen.
ReplyDeleteTo draw a straw man with a clown nose would be aboot right, eh?
DeleteHappy Candida day, everyone!
Happy Candide to you too.
DeleteMaybe I'm the first person here to say it but I find reading xkcd really boring. I have started reading hundreds of strips of xkcd of various lengths and probably finished a dozen throughout my life, not including parodies.
ReplyDeleteI find it hard to pick up a strip without immediately engaging a mindset of, "Here's a consumable that some guy has produced to make money and/or unload some issues. What comfortable fantasy is he creating to enable this?" And that's how my whole reading experience goes. xkcd makes no point well which can't be better made with reference to my cat's litter tray. It takes me nowhere without giving me the uncomfortable sense that someone thinks this is where I am supposed to need to be in order to see something false or escape something true. xkcd idealises; it romanticises; it preaches. It falls asleep and it dreams. It is a selfish journey away from the truth.
The world already has enough that is beautiful and that is abhorrent - and reality is far more challenging to confront. xkcd has always seemed like the easy way out.
Finished xkcd. And it was really, really average.
ReplyDelete95% of the cast was completely unlike-able, the exceptions being Black Hat Guy himself and Megan. The plot wasn't all that good, though it did have it's moments. The resolution was either extremely stupid or doesn't resolve much at all, depending on which you take.
That said, I didn't hate it. It was interesting enough to keep me reading, but it never wowed me or made me experience any emotion at all, for that matter. The sad moments never effected me, and the 'intense' moments made me go ''meh''. Everything is pretty much forgettable.
Can somebody explain me why people hyped it so much? Because there's absolutely nothing special about it.
About time you developed a bit of taste. I know it can be hard to understand sometimes, but xkcd is a true masterpiece and worth the effort for anybody who takes the time.
ReplyDeleteI think you were harder on 1232 than you should have been, but I admit it's not one of the best so I will accept it and await your future impressions.
Oh no. Rob's cracked at last.
ReplyDeleteAquarians love to fuck, what is your perception on the conflict between the Rohingya and the Rakhine?
ReplyDeleteDearest Rob,
ReplyDeleteI've no doubt that you use a well thought out set of effective rubrics to assess a point value score to any given xkcd comic, but do tell, how do you assign the appropriate letter grade to reflect that raw score?
Do you "Grade on a Curve" or do you employ the more sophisticated "Normal Distribution" with its attendant standard deviations above/below the mean?
same thing, dumbass
DeleteActually, no they are not.
DeleteI do recommend that you continue to defend this, your erroneous assertion, to the very end. Bring to bear a strength borne out of indignant rage, out of betrayal, out of embarrassment. Remember always that I do still taste like regret poured cold onto your naked spine.
I SHALL RISE TO THE CHALLENGE ANON 1:30 WAS TOO LIMP-WILLIED TO FACE!
DeleteNo, but seriously what does, "...the more sophisticated 'Normal Distribution' with its attendant standard deviations above/below the mean" even mean? Are you unintelligibly trying to state the tautology that points in a distribution often deviate from the distribution's mean?
I just saw a Frumps ad on the sidebar. Rob, have you no shame?
DeleteAnon@1:30 & Anon@4:59, ATLF's posts are all optimized to illicit nerd rage with there delibirate errors, and you have been fished hook, line and sinker.
DeleteBut we're not nerds, because we don't like xkcd.
DeleteAnon@5:24, you give way too much credit to ALTF. I like him and think he can be funny and smart, don't get me wrong, but nope. You're kinda like those guys who spend their lives interpreting the last xkcd comic as if it was condensed wisdom.
DeleteIt did actually once do that often, but certainly not in every post and very rarely anymore because most of the vulnerable people have left since this placed stopped seriously critiquing xkcd.
DeleteALT-F's greatest victory is over pronouns.
DeleteZhe has made some headway in that direction, but I would not venture to call zir entirely victorious at this point.
DeleteAll my victories are Pyrrhic when it comes to a certain type of pronoun!!
DeleteThe personal pronoun, the demonstrative pronoun, the interrogative pronoun, the indefinite pronoun, the relative pronoun and the reflexive pronoun are easily vanquished without much ado. The intensive pronoun, however, has proven to be no walk in the park!
And 'zhe' and 'zir'? Inspired my friend, inspired indeed.
"........ALT-F......"
"In Hoc Signo Victor Eris" is all I have to say about that.
Leave Victor out of this, you cunt.
Delete"Vulnerable", 1:52? May I know how you'd describe the current xkcdsucks population?
ReplyDeletefat
DeleteDetached. Dull. Desperate to be considered funny.
DeleteNo one's going to touch this one? But it's so fucking stupid!
ReplyDeleteGUYS, what if one of someone really significant to the development of modern computers talked about the weird insignificant shit that happens on it today!? Also what if I said he did all this other shit for -no reason-!?
GUYS GUYS, what if I get too fucking lazy to actually draw the wire to the headset in the 3rd panel?! Is it too modern to need a wire anymore? Are the first two panels in any fucking way different from each other? Has my wavering hand generated more profound moments than ever intended before??? IT. WILL. BLOW. MINDS.
I liked it. I mean the comic, not your comment.
DeleteNo, Engelbart is supposed to be saying all that. He spoke about those technological applications in his 1968 presentation, and Randall cleverly slipped in an additional bit about the inane type of things that these technologies would lead us to.
DeleteYou're either not allowed to use "cleverly" any more, or you shouldn't be allowed near words at all (or within 50 feet of schools). Turn in your badge and your gun.
Deleteyou're a bit dumb, sleeper
DeleteIt's a welcome break from Euromuppet levels of dumb.
Deletenot really
Delete1235: Since a large portion of the US population is now equipped with cameras sometimes, it is manifest that nowhere in a landmass 16 times the size of the US could cryptids ever have existed without us having proof.
ReplyDeleteLet's ignore for now that a "real" photo would be unverifiable, and fake photos are often unfalsifiable, thanks to photo editing and (deliberately) shitty camerawork.
The smug title of the comic notwithstanding, cameras haven't really changed the debate over Bigfoot et al. in any significant way. It will always be possible for lunatics to make baseless claims that aren't demonstrably false.
Shitty comic is shitty and poorly thought out as usual.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-13507026
Delete1236: Look, I can do graphs, too. (About Rob is fat x How much of a giant fatass he is) is the same as saying Rob = fat.
ReplyDeleteGods, guys, forget Randall's complete disregard for why people think they here an ocean for another stupid ass comic, here's genius right here.
catchphshsha: 102 guaggrs, just like you guys.
Speaking of shells, I wanna hear your throats shucking. It's like poetry night all over again.
DeleteI'm actually surprised that Randall has ever picked up a shell you can hold to your ear at the beach at all, let alone been there every time he's held one. Those things are collected almost as rapidly as they're deposited. The vast majority of the time I've handled a shell large enough to make a sound when you hold it to your ear, I've been a long way from the sea.
ReplyDeleteSmith & Wesson stock has appreciated over 20% since the onset of the Martin-Zimmerman trial.
ReplyDeleteIf the Jew is not found Guilty, I reckon the German brethren of Tray Von Martin will make their displeasure known.
The Market seems to have known the result since the opening arguments.
...irrelevant?
Deleteno
DeleteHey, do any of you think you'll ever have sex? I don't know. Girls seem a bit scary. I've been thinking about celebrating my 25th birthday with a trip to a brothel, but I don't know that it's worth it.
ReplyDeleteIt's only worth it if you've got a coupon.
DeleteMeh. I've had sex and frankly it just doesn't compare to the sublime pleasure of driving around town while masturbating. It's the simple pleasures in life that are best buddy, don't throw out your money on pricey amenities like prostitutes when there are so many great lower-cost options available.
Deletei heard you're idea's and their good
Delete7:16 is quite the idiot.
DeleteHey, nooo. *I* am the idiot.
DeleteA panda walks into a café. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and proceeds to fire it at the other patrons.
ReplyDelete"Why?" asks the confused, surviving waiter amidst the carnage, as the panda makes towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder.
"Well, I'm a panda," he says. "Look it up."
The waiter turns to the relevant entry in the manual and, sure enough, finds an explanation. "Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Some psychopathic tendencies."
xkcd 1238=xkcd 326. At least he got rid of the "My hobby" crap for 1238
ReplyDeleteHm no. I understand that you have a burning hatred for Randall, but 326 has nothing to do with 1238. Also I'll always be amazed at how well people on xkcdsucks know xkcd...
Deletewe are all randall
DeleteOh, of course, and I am too! But still, it's so different from what I originally thought. I thought most people on here were simply disappointed with xkcd, no big deal. But now, I'm thinking that for a lot xkcdsucks posters, there is something more: some of them in fact used to be the most abject form of Randall-worshippers.
DeleteI thought most cuddlefish on here were simply disappointed with xkcdsucks, no big deal. But now, I'm thinking that for a lot cuddlefish posters, there is something more: some of them in fact used to be the most abject form of Rob-worshippers.
Deleterob mani padme hum
DeleteROB IS THE GREATEST THING TO EVER HAPPEN! WE CAN ONLY BE JOYOUS THAT WE ARE EVEN PERMITTED TO GLANCE AT HIS MAGNIFICENT WISDOM THROUGH HIS WORDS. THAT WE ARE ALLOWED TO READ EVEN WHOLE SENTENCES IS DUE TO ROB'S INFINITE MAGNANIMITY AND GENEROSITY.
Delete"ROB IS THE GREATEST THING..."
Delete*chuckles*
Rob is the greatest thing ever to happen to my dick. Looking forward to our next encounter.
DeleteIsn't "my dick" a rather strange way to refer to your genitalia when you think about it? Why "dick"? Why not "bob" or "sully"?
Deletefricatives
Deletemikespants
ReplyDeletePutting "[a] vitriolic and bitter collection of unwarranted nastiness about a silly and harmless comic" in the header doesn't stop it being true.
ReplyDeleteyou are like five years late to this party
DeleteAnd Rob's been having the worst hangover since then. Please excuse him.
DeleteThis blog made me ANGRY. Unfortunately, i am incapable of becoming a green giant to smack you down.
ReplyDeleteThis comment right here signals the end of xkcdsucks.
ReplyDeleteNope.
DeleteWould that it were so simple.
This one is definitely the last. I can feel it.
DeleteI too.
DeleteIf only, but I fear XKCD will always suck.
DeleteSo you guys feel a little awkward in social situations. I'll tell you a way to get over that feeling. One way is to try and make yourself useful. One useful thing you can lean how to do is how to light and keep a small fire going. No one else ever seems to want to do it, and it's fun if you do it right you can make you Mr. Popular.
DeleteSo when ever you are in an awkward social situation, light a small fire. It will dazzle and amaze. Soon you will have many friends and not be awkward any more.