"[a] vitriolic and bitter collection of unwarranted nastiness about a silly and harmless comic."
Welcome. This is a website called XKCD SUCKS which is about the webcomic xkcd and why we think it sucks. My name is Carl and I used to write about it all the time, then I stopped because I went insane, and now other people write about it all the time. I forget their names. The posts still seem to be coming regularly, but many of the structural elements - like all the stuff in this lefthand pane - are a bit outdated. What can I say? Insane, etc.
I started this site because it had been clear to me for a while that xkcd is no longer a great webcomic (though it once was). Alas, many of its fans are too caught up in the faux-nerd culture that xkcd is a part of, and can't bring themselves to admit that the comic, at this point, is terrible. While I still like a new comic on occasion, I feel that more and more of them need the Iron Finger of Mockery knowingly pointed at them. This used to be called "XKCD: Overrated", but then it fell from just being overrated to being just horrible. Thus, xkcd sucks.
Here is a comic about me that Ann made. It is my favorite thing in the world.
What is even the point of this? F
ReplyDeleteWhat is even the point of this? F
DeleteWhat is even the F of this? Point
DeletePoint this of F the even is? What
DeleteF for FOOL maybe.
DeleteWhat is the point of this blog if you're not going to write anything funny or specific to any comic
ReplyDeletethese were all specific to each of the comics
DeleteI like how the the folks at explainxkcd didn't have the slightest fucking idea what punchline Randall was trying to convey with 1227 either, so they settled for, "He was [i]deliberately trying[/i] to make an eye-gougingly boring tapestry of bland quotes, so that when you give up and go 'What the fuck, Randall?', you're actually only confirming the ideas endlessly parroted in those quotes".
ReplyDeleteAnd then they presumably rubbed their little button penises and laughed at the inferior plebeians that neglected to pore over the 5000 words quoted by Randall, the Great and Terrible.
In keeping with his history of being a goddamn spastic, Randy also seems to have emphasised phrases at random. The bold parts don't actually summarise or capture the essence of the quotes they are highlighted in. Stripped of the dull gray text, the quotes just sound like the fragmented babblings of a lunatic.
I thought the point of 1227 was Randall trying to make fun of people who say modern communication is killing the "art" of communication by pointing out that people have been saying that for a long time, about forms of communication that existed far earlier than, say, SMS or Twitter. Or something. Each of the highlighted segments does something to emphasize this point. While still poorly done, 1227 didn't confuse me, it just bored me.
DeleteI read all of them because I was rather hoping it might go somewhere. Instead we get a cluster of quotes from about forty years of history during which several advances were being made in communication technology.
DeleteI guess he was probably trying to say that all of these alarmist quotes about how the quality of interpersonal interaction are diminishing with the advent of Twitter and Facebook are clearly wrong, because it's been said before, but this is a really boring way of making this argument, as well as being woefully lacking in nuance.
It also ignores the possibility that perhaps we really have been getting dumber over the past century or so. I mean, think about it. Dostoevsky, Lewis Carroll, Emily Bronte, Jane Austen, Mary Shelley--these were the great writers of the 19th century. The XKCD fanboys would have us believe that the greatest writer of our generation is Randall Munroe.
"I read all of them..."
Delete:O
i make bad choices, euromuppet
Deletedo not be like me
"Each of the highlighted segments does something to emphasize this point." - 11:14
DeleteNo it doesn't, or at least, not consistently. In each case, the entire quote is devoted to that point. The bits Randall has highlighted, removed from their context, are often entirely tangential to the point being made. For example, Randall highlights phrases like "in olden times it was different", "fifteen words", or "the managers of sensational newspapers", which outside of the context of the quotes have zero meaning.
The distinction between the highlighted part and the rest of the text is, at best, inconsistent, and at worst, completely arbitrary.
Rob: Why couldn't that comment have been the actual review for 1227?
Deletei have a reputation to maintain
Deletei thought he highlighted it because he was guessing which parts would most likely be ignored if the average person had skimmed over it quickly, which is more or less what all that text is criticizing in the first place
Deletei read the entire thing and then felt like an idiot afterwards because i'm pretty sure i wasn't supposed to do that
"Each of the highlighted segments does something to emphasize this point."
DeleteNo they don't. They emphasise the same point, again and again. It would have been better if Munroe could have picked quotes from different periods of history, emphasising that nothing has really changed over 200+ years, but he wasted the opportunity, as that probably would have probably required more than 15 minutes of research.
I think 1227 just futher emphazises the fact that xkcd should be a picture blog and not a web comic. It's interesting, yes. But it's also unfunny and 100% text, two things that a comic should not be.
ReplyDeleteThe POINT, you braindead cocksucker, is to ENTERTAIN and AMUSE. Of course, intelligent humor is so far beyond your ken that you couldn't possibly comprehend such, so you're just going to have to take our word for it.
ReplyDeleteare you more than one person
Deletewe are the people who fuked your mome 1453
DeleteFor those of you unfamiliar with what a Mome is, it's a creature from Alice in Wonderland that sort of looks like two socks joined together. Here's a picture.
Delete2:42 is especially partial to sexually predating on these creatures, since they are rather naive and helpless, and centuries of habitat loss and domestication has left them very trusting of humans.
Alice In Wonderland was written by the English author Charles Lutwidge Dodgson. Mr. Dodgson was also the first person to use photography as a means to produce child pornography.
DeleteSexual predation indeed.
No, Alice in Wonderland was written by Pete Townshend.
DeleteThere is a difference between pornography and nudity. It is vaginal spreading. You never see spreading in National Geographic. Dodgson never got his models to spread. What did the butler see? Something rude. It involved spreading.
Delete"Vaginal spreading"?
DeleteYou mean labial spreading, right?
Vaginal spreading would involve the adept operation of a speculum.
And the difference between pornography and nudity is completely and utterly subjective.
For example, a penis becomes "pornographic" when its turgid angle from the vertical is greater than that of the Kintyre Peninsula
I think 10:36 just has a birth fetish.
DeleteThe angle of the dangle is properly referred to as tumescence.
Delete11:19, your mom's tumescence is 7 approximately 7 degrees.
DeleteAnonymous June 25, 2013 at 11:19 AM revealed,
Delete"....The angle of the dangle is properly referred to as tumescence......"
To what is it improperly referred?
The Tutor was properly intrigued by this "angle of the dangle" phrase. He would like to add, "square of the hair" and "cube of the tube" to the mix.
Your tutor is a hack. Those are terrible.
DeleteThe Tutor is indeed a hack, but his girthy tumescence is to die for.
DeleteHe would also like to add, "log of the, ermmmmm, ummmmmmm, log"
And I would like to add, "sum of the bum"
DeleteIsn't it inherent to pornography that it can only mean what you're seeing on the screen or picture? There is no suggestion in pornography, but there is suggestion in most non-pornographic nudity.
Deletethese PRETZELS are making me thirsty.
ReplyDeleteoh rob. sometimes i worry about you
ReplyDeleteRob, you fat fuck, start embedding the comics in your "reviews" again, I don't want to give Randy more pageviews, dammit
ReplyDeletein b4 "no u"
Deletei do what i want
DeleteRob is expressing his patriotic fervour!
DeleteAs is his due and duty!
FUCKING YEAH!
God bless the USA and nowhere else!
Hey guys! Know that game between Brasil and Uruguay tomorrow? It is going to happen on my city! Right outside the stadium there will be something around a hundred thousand protesters trying to breach FIFA's security perimeter, there's even a slim chance they might actually succeed and occupy the Mineirão itself. When I left my campus tonight (which is located right beside the Mineirão) I saw a "tent city" forming inside and around the rectory, those people are sleeping there so that they don't have to commute to the protest area tomorrow because the mayor declared a municipal holiday to be in place in the game day and ordered the municipal bus system to remain nonoperational during that same day as a desperate attempt to hinder the protesters access to the central zone of Belo Horizonte where most of the really big marches and demonstrations have amassed and begun in the last two weeks. The state governor is also scared shitless of how his military police have been unable to keep the population under control (even as they protest in front of his mansion) despite their indiscriminate and overkilling use of every "less-than-lethal" weapon in their arsenal, he has even begged Dilma to send in the army to save his sorry ass; Dilma in turn has sent a 1000 men-strong mechanized infantry battalion here, they arrived 3 days ago and ever since then it feels like the city is under siege, I see tanks and apcs rolling around the local air force base and a couple of blackhawks constantly whizzing all over the metropolitan area.
ReplyDeleteThis is so fucking cool!
I've heard there's an awful lot of coffee in Brazil.
DeleteA commentary on revolution from the bourgeoisie is so last millennium.
DeleteEumesmopo neither used the word "revolution", nor did he suggest he desires it.
DeleteYup. I did also add that I'm not from the bourgeoisie class and this really is no revolution. Even trough there are minorities in these manifestations who want radical changes in our current political system (fascists, neonazis, anarchists, communists, military coup d'etat supporters, neoliberals, dumbasses, etc...) the absolute majority has progressivist and social-democratic demands and want nothing more than to fix our democracy.
DeleteShe who does not deliberately close her cakehole cannot fail to see that the new "crumbly" trend in cakeism is nothing more nor less than a new variety of cookie-salespersonship. And if we judge confectioners, not by the glittering overalls they don nor by the highsounding sobriquets they give their products, but by their actions and by what they actually bake, it will be clear that "freedom of biscuit" means freedom for a cookie-salesperson trend in Baker-Democracy, freedom to convert Baker-Democracy into a dinner party of reform, freedom to introduce bourgeois crunch and bourgeois dunks into cakeism.
Deleteno one cares about a bunch of monkeys turkey is more interesting
Deletea bunch of monkeys in a room with a bunch of turkeys is more interesting
Delete(is altf a monkey or a turkey?)
Anon 1:45
DeleteAsswhipe.
When monkey moves to wipe ass, beware flying shit.
DeleteRandall Munroe = Jeph Jacques
ReplyDeleteYou want proof?
Exhibit A
Exhibit B
Their voices sound exactly the same.
You have also never seen them in the same room together.
Exhibit C
Plus, this blog hasn't had a good conspiracy theory in like ages.
Jon Levi would know because Jon Levi is them.
DeleteI found myself inexorably drawn into a Jean Luc Picard facepalm as I looked at Exhibit C. That, plus much sighing.
DeleteI never thought much about Questionable Content. Just that it's a boring webcomic. Having read that particular sample, I now loathe the author thoroughly. The thought that fans probably admired him for producing that adds a particular edge to the sentiment.
DeleteJust start reviewing the comics in the future. Its not like we can expect better. Watch:
ReplyDelete1232: What is even the point of this? F
Called it!
DeleteCan we please administer this test to ALTF as continued North America residency prerequisite? It will spend first 10 minutes consulting with tutor for obscure references to supplement Question 1 and immediately fail. Deportation follows.
ReplyDeleteI had to sit a test once that included a measurement of literacy. I can therefore view this discussion among obvious laymen, with a pleasurable lofty detachment.
DeleteYou will prostrate yourselves and exclaim "We're not worthy", and I, with most atypical aplomb, will accept the adulation stoically as my due. Then I’ll temper my subsequent communication with a bit of arm’s-length snobbery and diffidence, as is also my due.
Unfortunately, my computer/ISP is banned from "Slate". The Tutor annoyed them at some point in the distant past. And as much as my deportation from North America would please many people, my subsequent activities after which would be rather displeasing to same. The lauded 1% has determined that 'keeping me close' is the best option.
The lauded 1% couldn't give a fuck whether you live or die, love. Well, OK, I guess it'd bother tutor's daddy that his son would have to find a new pet.
Delete1231: Instead of just letting people enjoy a weighty and fascinating discovery, Randall once again feels the need to place himself above it all. Fortunately, we can enjoy it anyway.
ReplyDeleteOK, fuck you. That's it. I'm done with this place.
DeleteImagine if Anonymous actually left this place?
DeleteWhat would it look like?
Would it be as erudite?
Would it be as amusing?
Would it be as pertinent?
Would Rob finally accept that he is as popular as a pesky yeast infection?
Would Rob finally take that trip to that Ashram in India to accept the offer to be Guru?
Guru Rishi Rob's ashram will be developed to protect his Yajnas from being defiled by those demons of Anonymous?
Oṃ maṇi padme hūṃ
Fuck you too. Definitely leaving.
DeleteOh no, what ever shall we do?
Deletehttp://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=2393537&page=2&page=2
ReplyDeleteWhat does the alt-text for 1230 even mean? How do you represent "co-ordinates" on one axis? Or, as always, am I expected to chuckle benignly and go, "Oh Randall, you silly goose, how you amuse me with your whimsical nonsense"?
ReplyDeleteFucking... oh, God. Fucking hell. How do you people get through the day? You seem to stupid to even piss. Your bladders should have exploded a long time ago.
Delete'to stupid'
Deletebut yes, 10:20 is a dumb
DeleteWhat the fuck does intelligence have to do with the ability to piss, you turd guzzling mongrel? Since you also seem to be privy to the machinations of Randall's mind, explain to me, step by step, how you can have plot a 3 parameter function on two axes. I must admit, it does escape my limited comprehension.
Delete"The title text is, well, wrong. To plot coordinates "as a function of time" you would need THREE-axes" - JamesCurran (on the explainxkcd page)
DeleteA beacon of reason among a sea of drooling retards. I guess it's important to remember all xkcd fans aren't mongoloids of 1:43's calibre.
Fuck you and your stupid shit, I'm leaving.
Deletecome back
Deletesomeone doesn't understand polar coordinate plots.
DeleteYes. It's probably you, since you seem to think vaguely namedropping "polar co-ordinates" will make it sound like you know something I don't. It doesn't matter what co-ordinate system you use. A state with three degrees of freedom cannot be represented on a visual medium with two degrees of freedom (this includes polar plots in two dimensions, but then if you actually knew what polar co-ordinates are, I wouldn't have to explain this to you).
Deletehyphen hyphen hyphen
DeleteCommunal paradise or shared misery? Co-op or coop? THE POWER OF HYPHENS: YOU DECIDE.
DeleteWhere are you putting that mirror, Randall? On the MOON?
ReplyDeleteyo mom's ass
Delete