Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Comics 985 and 986: Something About The Time Cube Guy

985. Randy has revealed that he has a superpower: he can detect ambiguity where none exists, as well as inventing problems that do not actually happen in the real world. He also lists several things that would be bad for a politician to do, and then lists some crazy people who support those things. It is extremely hilarious.

986. In this comic, Randall lets his readers know that he has a kidney disorder. This is a very hard time for him, as he can no longer satisfy his milk fetish for very long at all without having to interrupt himself to go urinate.

221 comments:

  1. moar liek time cube GOY amirite?

    lol jews

    ReplyDelete
  2. what is with all this ad hominem are you latin or something?

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  3. what the niggertits does 'cray' mean? are you from the south or smt?

    glorious Maine master race reporting in

    ReplyDelete
  4. whoa creepy deja vu there, 6:35

    are you reading my brainwaves or smt

    ReplyDelete
  5. 'cray' is like 'crazy' except your keyboard sucks

    ReplyDelete
  6. I thought you said hateblog auteurs don't get do-overs or corrections! You lied!

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  7. i've never said that, i do it all the time

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  8. fuck off back to china Luiqi Mao

    we don't need your snake eyed yellow bellied kind round here, gook!

    ReplyDelete
  9. I gotta say Rob, I'm just a little dissapointed. After a raft of mediocre comics, there comes a group of incredibly substandard ones (they're not even poor jokes, they're poor observations) that make me actually loathe the comic, and I come here to see you've gone all xkcdexplained on me.

    Where is the bile, where is the energy!?

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  10. if he's lied about that, maybe he also lied about hating xkcd OH GOD

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  11. these suck
    you're putting in as much work into these as randy puts into most of his xkcds

    ReplyDelete
  12. Never, 9:22. I'm staying here and I'm going to steal your job by being better at it and being willing to work for far less, because I am not a fat, lazy American.

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  13. >comes to America to get nice, well paid job and escape from opressive shithole
    >herp derp americans are fat trolololol

    classic chinaman

    captcha: wingbo
    Luigi Mao had some spicy wingbo chicken wing at General Mao's buffett

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  14. I have no problem with the US government. It's the general public in the US that are worthless, especially the working class.

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  15. ho I am so superior to american working crass

    sirry baka gaijin dont want to work for 18 hours a day at $.14 an hour. No wonder china race so great, since we varue our work so highry

    also,
    >mfw most American weeaboos and hipsters probably agree with little Mao

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  16. Typical US grunt, unable to separate the cultures of different countries.

    Ya see, y'all non-'Merkuns don' unnerstan' that GAWD SMILES DAWN UPON ARR CUNTRY, an' that is why we all need two fridges, cos that's the 'Merkun dream, boy.

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  17. Japan and China are close enough for anyone's purposes. If one can group together Greeks and Spaniards, what gets weeaboos' panties in bunches about grouping Japan and China?

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  18. Only Americans group Greeks and Spaniards together.

    I don't particularly care about your lack of understanding. I was just using it as an example of American stupidity.

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  19. Chinaman in America:
    Given opportunities to succeed and even get ahead of native-born Americans

    American in China:
    YOU NO HAVE RIGHTS HERE WHITE DEVIR, PREASE TO SHOW PAPERS IMMEDIATERY (and neither do we, tee hee!)

    Double standards much?

    ReplyDelete
  20. You act like I am responsible for the actions of the Chinese government. I have no problem with an American going to China, so long as they aren't lazy, stupid or fat.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Latest XKCD

    The comic is wrong, and that's all I have to say about it




    DRINK DRINK DRINK
    WATER

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  22. GOOMHR I'm an incredible genius who would accomplish astonishing feats if I wasn't so lazy too!

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  23. @Sam2 If you want rage, hyphen has posted two great reviews for 986, and another one for 985. I appreciate that noone takes hyphen seriously, but the reviews there are simply better.

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  24. Shut up Jon, I don't and never will take hyphen seriously.

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  25. Die in a fire Jon Levi

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  26. Jon Levi, my Bible weighs more than my copy of Newton's Principia. Discuss.

    captcha: ruedst - my posts are the.

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  27. Kitten, I like how you are actually stealing an American job

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  28. Is luigi mao just Legion of Kittens with a name change?

    Mind = blown

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  29. I have no probrem with restricting rights of others, but as a Chinaman I refuse to be responsibre for my government. Prease American government give me sanctuary whire I criticise the good natured peopre who erected you.

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  30. There actually was some ambiguity in 985, since they didn't give the new poll number. They could have been trying to cover up how stupid the voters were.

    I'm curious as to what he thought up first. The campaign, or the percent joke.

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  31. So Ann Apolis = Ravenzomg = Legion of Kittens = Luigi Mao

    Mind = blown

    It's funny how all the male regulars are distinguishable by their posting styles and varying levels of autism but the females and chinamen are indistinguishable

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  32. I'm pretty sure Ann is an American male, though certainly very sexually confused.

    Captcha: noftion. Ancient Noftion land. Trespassers will be guilt-ridden.

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  33. I move that we all go to my place and snuggle my cat.

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  34. I move that fuck you.

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  35. This comment thread is terrible and you should all feel terrible.

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  36. Rob you lazy-ass ass
    You don't even get mad anymore do you

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  37. Are you upset that you weren't involved, Capn? Or were my stinging barbs about Americans too hurtful?

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  38. He was just joining in with me and Bloop on the inside jokes. You wouldn't understand.

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  39. Looking all the way back to Portugal I'd have to say that China has the least impressive of all the modern empires.

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  40. Ruiqi Meow, comes to America, loves the government, hates the people.

    American's hate the government, love the people.

    Go back to China, you're doing it wrong.

    (I'm glad you've taken the 1st steps of independent thinking, however, you're not quite thinking things through enough.)

    Also, the working class are Jaded because we each paid more in taxes last year than Mark Zuckerburg and GE combined.

    (You'll make an excellent patsy some day.)

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  41. I hate both the government AND the people. I like secondary education, though.

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  42. [This comment has been censored by the People's Republic of China]

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  43. It appears Chinamen have too much Render unto Caesar and not enough When in Rome, 10:27.

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  44. I hate the Chinese government but love its people, by the way. I've read the Chinese constitution, and it reads like a middle school essay on sex.

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  45. Oh, you guys and your inside jokes.

    Why won't you let me in, Capn?

    WHY WON'T YOU LET ME IN

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  46. (By the way, captcha: ingested. I ingest your motion.)

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  47. The worst part about China is that it's filled with Chinese.

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  48. My ship sailed from China with a cargo of tea
    All la-den with presents for you and for me
    They brought me a fag, just im-ag-ine my bliss
    When he trolls the site daily like this, like this, like this.

    ReplyDelete
  49. My ship sailed from Beijing with compliments of fish
    Its cargo hold full with e'ry desire and wish
    They brought me a fag. Imagine my glee!
    I lit up that blunt, yes-sir-ee

    ReplyDelete
  50. The sole reason I read hyphen is for the distinct lack of gooks and other slant-eyes.

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  51. It's true, Gamer is pretty racist, but then he is a typical American.

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  52. I think America picked the wrong side one in WWII.

    Case in point:
    1. China
    2. Israel

    discuss

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  53. That's what she: I'm not American at all you utter arse

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  54. So Legion of Fluffy Kittens is been a Chinaman all along

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  55. the problem with the chinaman is that he fails to understand the core decency of the white mans culture.

    also the slitty eyes

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  56. What? I never said I was Chinese.

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  57. The problem with the chinaman is that we didn't throw them all out after the railroad was done.

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  58. When you have a terracotta army, every solution looks like a hammer.

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  59. @11:45, I see the chink in your armor.

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  60. Chinaman sounds like a Megaman boss. His pattern would involve jumping around and throwing expensive plates. Also censoring you.

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  61. Obviously, this robot master's weapon would be Chinaman's weakness.

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  62. Industrial Man?

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  63. I had high hopes for you, TWS. And you dashed them. Dashed them on the rocks like a Chinese baby girl.

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  64. You raised my hopes and dashed them quite expertly. Bravo.

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  65. Since when did making fun of the Chinese suddenly become okay?

    I don't think it's okay.

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  66. 12:42 = Chinese = Same Fag = Ruiqi Meow = Randall Munroe

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  67. = Rob = ALT-F = George Bush = Abraham Lincoln = Mao

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  68. = Carl = T_A = Femaltoth = HateBottles = Dr. Horrible = Hitler

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  69. =^_^= d'awww

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  70. I miss The_Autodidact. He was a good troll.

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  71. For all we complain that XKCD should just be a picto-blog, Rob's reviews are so shit XKCDSucks might as well be a discussion board.

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  72. Anonymous, for all you complain about how Rob's reviews are shit, your posts suck so much you might as well be censored like a Chinaman.

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  73. i miss altf and also the times before the chinese occupation of xkcdsucksdick

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  74. Burma
    Curma
    Curna
    Cuina
    China

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  75. China
    Thina
    Thing
    Thong

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  76. Thong
    Rhong
    Rhony
    Raony
    Ranny
    Randy

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  77. Dicksmash McIroncockDecember 7, 2011 at 2:34 PM

    Randy
    Pandy
    Pundy
    Punsy
    Pussy

    Captcha: gonat

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  78. Pussy
    Russy
    Rusey
    Ruvey
    Ruven
    Raven

    ReplyDelete
  79. Penile burninationDecember 7, 2011 at 2:54 PM

    Raven
    Raveo
    Ravbo
    Rasbo
    Resbo
    Lesbo

    ReplyDelete
  80. My name is Anon and I laughed at 987. As in "out loud". For the first time in a long, long time.

    That is all.

    ReplyDelete
  81. http://asofterworld.com/index.php?id=633

    this is a good enough reason on its own for xkcdsucks.

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  82. Megan
    Mecan
    Decan
    Dican
    Dicas
    Dicks

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  83. Dicks
    Dicks
    Dicks
    Dicks
    Dicks
    Dicks
    Dicks
    Dicks
    Dicks
    Dicks
    Dicks
    Dicks
    Mushroom
    Mushroom

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  84. 90 posts in a day

    noice, mate

    ReplyDelete
  85. Does anyone else think it's incredibly sad that this blog even exists? Randall Munroe, whether you like what he does or not, is simply an artist who is sharing his work at no cost to you. If you don't like XKCD, you don't have to view it. It's that simple. And, frankly, it's a bit disturbing that you seem to get off on spouting this kind of stuff toward someone who didn't do anything to you. It seems to be symptomatic of an underlying problem in your psyche.

    Billions of people read XKCD and enjoy it. If you don't, there are hundreds of other webcomics out there for you to enjoy. There's no point whatsoever in sitting around in your basement being angry about one particular comic strip, beyond showing the world what a sad, lonely jerk you are.

    I know I'll probably be flamed for this post, but it needed to be said, and I'm sure there are others out there who agree with me.

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  86. "Does anyone else think it's incredibly sad that this blog even exists? "

    yeah it breaks my heart every day

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  87. I'm going to copy 7:22 and post it every few days, that is delicious copy pasta right thar.

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  88. I am so glad for xkcdsucks.blogspot.com. I am super constipated and nothing helps while away my time on the toilet like reading through the latest comments. Thankyou, xkcdsucks.blogspot.com. Thankyou.

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  89. @7:51 at first i poorly parsed your comment and thought it meant "I am super constipated and nothing helps while [I'm] away; my time on the toilet [is] like reading through the latest comments"

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  90. @8:17 That's alright, I forgive you.

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  91. I can't believe this blog even exists when it's the aniversary of Pearl Harbour! Don't you have better things to do with your energy? There are real probelms out in the world today, like the start of World War 2, pear harbour.

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  92. There's a harbour of pears? Why wasn't I told?

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  93. 'Billions of people read XKCD and enjoy it.' billions? are you sure? maybe you need to check out xkcd, which has often shown us how wrong it is when people exaggerate the scales of numbers

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  94. xkcd is the national sport of india

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  95. 3/10, 7:22. It was going reasonably but the "billions" was a needless display of braggadocio.

    captcha: cesist: cried the Chinamen police officer as he spotted a citizen trying to give his opinion somewhere.

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  96. Does anyone else think it's incredibly sad that the war in the pacific even exists? Japan, whether you like what he does or not, is simply an artist who is sharing his bombs at no cost to you. If you don't like Japanese imperialists, you don't have to fight them. It's that simple. And, frankly, it's a bit disturbing that you seem to get off on spouting this kind of warfare toward someone who didn't do anything to you. I mean, did you personally know anyone who died at Pearl Harbor? It seems to be symptomatic of an underlying problem in your psyche.

    Billions of people are ruled by the Japanese and enjoy it. If you don't, there are hundreds of other countries out there for you to enjoy. There's no point whatsoever in sitting around in your headquarters being angry about one particular Japanese invasion, beyond showing the world what a sad, lonely jerk you are.

    I know I'll probably be flamed for this post, but it needed to be said, and I'm sure there are others out there who agree with me.

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  97. Billions of people enjoy xkcd?

    Well, TRILLIONS of people hate it.

    Deal with it.

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  98. Anonymous, as an Australian, I was denied the enjoyment of Japanese bombs by warmongering Americans.

    I salute you.

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  99. I'd love to change, but I've been sitting in my parent's basement for years just stewing with rage. I no longer know how to love =[

    Or to function in society, but then again WHO DOES, AMIRITE? NUKKA WAT!

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  100. "There's no point whatsoever in sitting around in your basement being angry about one particular comic strip, beyond showing the world what a sad, lonely jerk you are."

    Isn't that reason enough?

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  101. 985 actually made me think of 558 in that both are just randy thinking "HEY those things sound close ! Let's say tv is stupid and uses that !"

    But 558 at least tried to have a punchline other than the alleged ambiguity.

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  102. 985 made me think of 589 because they have the same numbers.

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  103. 985 didn't make me think of anything... In fact none of Randal's comics has in a very long time.

    I take it back. 986 did remind me I could save time by pissing into the water fountain. Although, the title should have been "Efficiency", and there should have been Bear Grylls standing in the center, urinating into his own mouth. Captioned: "I came to a fork in the road... and I took the path less traveled."

    Alt-text: If Randal could ever eat slowly enough, he could feast on his feces forever.

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  104. but then there wouldn't be enough for his fanbase to eat

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  105. Does anyone else think it's incredibly sad that this blog even exists? Randall Munroe, whether you like what he does or not, is simply an artist who is sharing his work at no cost to you. If you don't like XKCD, you don't have to view it. It's that simple. And, frankly, it's a bit disturbing that you seem to get off on spouting this kind of stuff toward someone who didn't do anything to you. It seems to be symptomatic of an underlying problem in your psyche.

    Billions of people read XKCD and enjoy it. If you don't, there are hundreds of other webcomics out there for you to enjoy. There's no point whatsoever in sitting around in your basement being angry about one particular comic strip, beyond showing the world what a sad, lonely jerk you are.

    I know I'll probably be flamed for this post, but it needed to be said, and I'm sure there are others out there who agree with me.

    ReplyDelete
  106. http://xkcdsucks.blogspot.com/2009/12/no-one-is-forcing-you-to-read-it.html

    Read, please. This argument has already been addressed many times over. xkcd is not something that can be ignored or avoided, because its fans won't stop mentioning/linking/embedding it everywhere they possibly can.

    ReplyDelete
  107. XKCD has 1.7 million monthly viewers. If it were a country it would be about the size of Guinea-Bissau.

    If you can ignore Guinea-Bissau in your daily life (most of us can't), you can ignore XKCD.

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  108. 1.7 million is the population of Urumqi in China. If you can ignore Urumqi (most of us don't even know it exists), you can ignore xkcd.

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  109. 1.7 million is about the number of active personnel in the US Armed Forces. If you can ignore the US Armed Forces, you can ignore xkcd.

    ReplyDelete
  110. 1.7 million is Rob's weight. If you can ignore Rob, you can ignore xkcd.

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  111. Ok, I'm pretty sure 987 is half GOOMHR bait and half actual bad joke. We can rest assured Randall has taken the high road with this comic.

    ReplyDelete
  112. 17 is the number of people who show any interest in this blog. If you can ignore them, the world would be a much happier place for you.

    ReplyDelete
  113. @awkisopen That was a copypasta. Please read the comment thread more carefully. ;D

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  114. I'm gonna go around posting this in every random blog I see.

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  115. He was talking to the first guy who posted it, dipfuck.

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  116. @2:11 How do you know, douchefag?

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  117. Because you're not worth a rebuttal, pussybitch.

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  118. ok, i do love a good copypasta(:P) but im also in agreement with the first person who posted that msg, its true that noone is forcing you to read xkcd, and if you dont like it then it begs the question why do you comment on it?? granted some of the things on this blog have been alittle funny but it gets alittle old just bashing on the guy all the time. why dont you try writing something like xkcd and then well see how hard it is to write something like the xkcd author(too lazy to remeber his name:P) does?

    and the brest milk thing is just disturbing, maybe if you think that xkcd is being creepy or whatever then its time to inspect your self in the mirror, a guy who makes a comic about math and love v.s. a guy who talks about brest milk?? yeah...well whatever, have fun sickos

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  119. 3:04, how would you feel if you found out that there was someone on the Internet who made a comic about math and love AND talked about breast milk?

    captcha: busnowe: catchthe

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  120. @3:04: Okay, I get that the sicko who talks about breast milk is randall, but who's the other guy you're talking about?

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  121. @anonymous: uhm the one who writes xkcd?? maybe thats why this blog is so messed up nobody has reasonable dedudction skills...

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  122. What would happen if a person wasn't able to pee for a really long time? Could this actually kill a person? How long before it became a hazard to their health?

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  123. eventually you explode due to the pressure of the accumulated pee. how long depends on how much you drink.

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  124. guise do you ever fart on your hand and smell the fart?

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  125. I got a computing degree just after the first dot com crash, a mathematics degree just before the financial crisis, and I'm due to complete a law degree just as government legal aid is abolished for most civil cases. Why do I bother?

    ReplyDelete
  126. It's called math, you moronsDecember 8, 2011 at 3:56 PM

    1.7 million is about 500 times the number of people who died at 9/11. If you can ignore 9/11, you can ignore 500 xkcds.
    captcha: ingli, it's called inglish you morons

    ReplyDelete
  127. What amazes me about this site is the fact that in order for it to even exist, Rob (or Carl, or Ravenzomg, or whoever), a professed xkcd-hater, must read his eternal bane every day without fail.

    So either he's fishing for an excuse to be negative, or he's masochistic, or he has some kind of martyr complex, or he's sycophantic enough that he'll stoop to the level of reading something he hates just to be popular. I think I'll go with the first one up there for now.

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  128. 1.7 million is about 500 times the number of people who died at 9/11. If you can ignore 500 9/11s*, you can ignore one xkcd.

    FTFY

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  129. @Leahcim arrrrrrgh successful troll = successful

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  130. foofle 466453 google googel googil google google gewgle gewgle gogle gooogle googlecom googlee ... boy google sure has it's bases covered when it comes to misspellings!

    ... I suppose randall can't write a comic about this now that it's here ... or can he?

    ReplyDelete
  131. @3:04
    No, it does NOT beg the question. Go look up what that phrase means, dickshit.

    ReplyDelete
  132. Still it has no answer for me, yet the question has, in fact, been begged. Why oh great Why? Why is Why so merciless, cold and uncaring?

    Plead though I might, the question has only a query to give -- If only it were given in the form of an answer.

    ReplyDelete
  133. @Anon 3:04 - not true. I don't force anyone to read xkcd.

    ReplyDelete
  134. I have a question for you.

    A simple question.

    If you could make enough money to live just by spending 15 minutes a day scrawling a simple comic, would you?

    Because when it comes down to it that is what Randall is doing.

    He is a businessman and he has a very efficient business.

    And you probably envy that business.

    The reason you're not doing it is because you lack the insight to find an audience and to sell to it. So you erect this strawman that Randall fails on some notion of "quality" and it makes you feel better.

    But there is only one measurement of quality in the marketplace: profit.

    He wins.

    And you're bitter because you lose.

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  135. The gig is up, James has burst our balloon!

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  136. @1:42

    I have a question for you.

    A simple question.

    If you could make enough money to live just by spending 15 minutes a day scrawling a simple complaint about a popular comic, would you?

    Because when it comes down to it that is what Robdall is doing.

    He is a businessman and he has a very efficient business.

    And you probably envy that business.

    The reason you're not doing it is because you lack the insight to find an audience and piss them off. So you erect this strawman that Robdall fails on some notion of "google adsense" and it makes you feel better.

    But there is only one measurement of quality in the marketplace: profit.

    He wins.

    And you're bitter because you lose.

    Because you opened this page.

    Captcha: fatig. It was gonna be "fatigue" but captcha just didn't have the strength.

    ReplyDelete
  137. "If you could make enough money to live just by spending 15 minutes a day scrawling a simple complaint about a popular comic, would you?"

    You know, now that I think of it, I probably wouldn't handle it. It would be maddening to have a life in which your only true responsibility is to scribble a few lazy lines on a paper and publish it online three days a week, because it's too boring and mind-numbingly restricting, yet you HAVE to do it, you have no choice to branch out and do other things. If such comic actually were something that could evolve, that I could build, then it would be worthwhile, but I should also be able to scrap it when I think I'm done and move on. But no: Randall is irreversibly stuck to xkcd, he NEEDS the comic. I couldn't cope with that. I need a more interesting life. I have a job that takes a lot more than 15 minutes a day, but at least it changes, it moves on, it forces me to do and think things differently every once in a while. The job I have is more artistically relevant and interesting than any xkcd comic. AND I get to work with music, theatre and writing on my spare time to keep the creative juices flowing, and I don't need to pander to a group of sycophantic losers who depend on me.

    So, yeah, I win.

    ReplyDelete
  138. I... I don't have a response to that.

    I'm sorry about that post. I guess I'm just projecting because I'm making minimum wage as a part-time door greeter at Walmart. And I only got that job because my dad is the manager there.

    ReplyDelete
  139. STOP THE PRESSES

    NOSTALGIA EXISTS

    OK YOU CAN START THE PRESSES AGAIN

    ReplyDelete
  140. Wow, that's the first funny C&H comic in, what, two years?

    ReplyDelete
  141. I liked todays xkcd because I like any and all things that are cynical towards boomers

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  142. Guys if you MUST impersonate me - and I understand that you poor things actually really MUST, at least if you ever want to come close to knowing what adequacy feels like - then I give you permission to do so, but I want to go on record as stating that making me defend xkcd is unbelievably mean-spirited, even for cavemen like yourselves.

    (Unless it's someone else with the same name. In which case just lol faggot.)

    ReplyDelete
  143. Disregard previous post I had a cock in my mouth and couldn't see what I was typing.

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  144. And it took you 20 minutes to get your master off and swallow everything? I hope he punished you thoroughly.

    ReplyDelete
  145. James?

    You're a cunt.

    I was asked to leave. It seems the Lao PDR folks discovered the real reason I was in-country.

    Daw Suu says hello by the way.

    ReplyDelete
  146. @Fernie but there would be nothing stopping you from treating that fifteen minutes as a second job. Plenty of time left in the day to do another job while still feeling fresh, and a second income can be a powerful thing.

    I often wonder why Randall doesn't do that himself, frankly. Some time in the real world would stimulate what little creativity he has, and would lend a lot more credence to his conviction about time directly equating to money.

    ReplyDelete
  147. So guys what do y'all think of the new xkcd? I appreciate it mildly, since fuck baby boomers.

    ReplyDelete
  148. Is that you Kitten?
    I think I missed you most of all.

    ReplyDelete
  149. 'Tis me. Since you left, this place has been a tepid pond filled with amoeba desperately trying to create memes.

    Please teach them to be better people.

    ReplyDelete
  150. As a storied Spartan and stoic, not to mention a brevitously laconic trollop, sure.

    ReplyDelete
  151. Yeah, this is boring. Let's talk about ponies instead.

    I like Fluttershy because she has a good name, but would probably also hit Pinkie Pie if given the chance.

    ReplyDelete
  152. Look at me. I like an uncool show about ponies because that's a cool thing to do now. I'm such a free thinker.

    ReplyDelete
  153. John Demp: The Park RangerDecember 9, 2011 at 11:57 AM

    ATLF I LAVV U AM SO GLEDD UR BACK PLS PSL DO SUM HUMILITATING POO ON MY CHEST SO IC AN BATHE IN UR SHITTY GLORY


    I LAVV U

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  154. i missed you too altf please visit my blog please please i'm begging you

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  155. @cptnoremac Is that supposed to be some sort of parody? A pathetic attempt. I never said, implied or thought I was a "free thinker," and I don't even like the show. I just like the toys and looking at pictures of sexualised animals that are childish but not technically children.

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  156. I do not like Alberta's Bituminous Sands - also called the 'Alberta Oil Sands' by its proponents and the 'Alberta Tar Sands' by its detractors - not for any ecological/economic reasons but simply because it killed Tasha Yar and made Deanna Troi cry.

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  157. Are we reaching that point in life where all facts are obtained and checked in Wikipedia, reducing the possession of knowledge to the ability to edit a "wiki"?

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  158. Your lost touch. It's showing.

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  159. Says the one guy who's biting.

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  160. I miss social democracy. Neoliberalism has made the world suck.

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  161. I's struggling to decipher your pixelations Capn, but if it was meant for me and I understand it correctly, you're right.

    I am still on S, E. Asian time - it's 3:40 AM for me - and I am still suffering the effects of the 'Extra Happy Pizza' I ingested prior to boarding my flight from Luang Prabang.
    I'll be better tomorrow.
    I promise.

    Apologies for the Star Trek garbage - BP made me write it. I have no idea who these people are/were. 'Tasha Yar' sounds, to me, like an apéritif one would enjoy like a fine Port, an album from Frank Zappa or a visit from an anxious yet friendly ghost.

    Anonymous @ 12:40 PM,

    Yins is a cunt. And no mistake.

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  162. Oh God, the diplomat's whore is back.

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  163. I was reading Abu Hamza’s sermons on the plane yesterday. I agree with him - up to a point. I disagree with him about the need to blow up London and we don't agree on the subject of flying airliners into buildings (he’s for, I’m against.) In his wider argument that the UK is a moral cesspit and that the British are filthy drunken animals, I thought he made some valid points.

    "They want only to look at nude pictures, go to football matches, have a few pints and go to sleep." This is not an ignorant ill-informed caricature; it is actually quite accurate, and the only riposte I can think of is that it beats blowing yourself up.

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  164. @ Anonymous 1:04 PM.

    God had nothin' to do with it dearie.

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  165. Britain was the only country free enough, until recently, to allow people like Hamza to speak out. If you don't appreciate that, you're really missing the point. With your medical background you could do worse than reading some Piaget.

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  166. I think Mr. Cameron is worse than Hitler. Hitler had his faults, of course, as he himself would be the first to admit. Many of his “Nazi theories” have now been debunked. With the benefit of hindsight his invasion of Russia was ill-conceived, and his scheme to exterminate the “lesser races” has been widely discredited.

    Once you accept his premises though – lebensraum, the supremacy of the Ayran race, et cetera - his actions did have a kind of loony logic. He meant well. Cameron, on the other hand, is working single-mindedly for the triumph of Evil. Only when you have grasped this do his policies make any sense.

    Now I’m not trying to defend the Nazis here, don’t get me wrong, but they did at least leave behind a few autobahns. Cameron merely fucked up the EU, with no compensating benefits. Whether the Conservatives “meant well” is beside the point, though in my opinion they did not mean well, but were motivated by malice, hatred of the British public, and the sheer joy of wrecking.

    Can you imagine Cameron taking responsibility for the state of the UK, and shooting himself in a burning bunker? Of course you can't. At least Hitler could admit when he was wrong.

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  167. Who the shit is Mr. Cameron?

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  168. My first response was going to be: "An 'X is worse than Hitler' troll? Not a great start." But I think an ad hominem tu quoque is the sort of simplistic response requred to such a cookie cutter opening salvo. With that in mind:

    All evil is motivated by pride; all good is borne of humility. Tories, as you well note, revel in the "sheer joy of wrecking": they do it because they can. Because the earth's an insignificant prick from a few miles up, but it's mighty large when you're stuck on it. This little tune summarises Cameron's behaviour as well as any undergrad essay.

    But how is this any different from you, ALTF? Where is your humility? You treat this forum as your plaything, as Cameron treats his country. At least Cameron has put himself up for the vote. Can you imagine yourself leaving if an Ostracism elected to exile you? Of course you can't.

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  169. 988 is so fucking stupid. Is he just pulling facts out of thin air now? What about "All I Want For Christmas is You?" and what about fucking Slade and fucking Wizzard (do you get these classics in the US?). There are loads of outrageously overplayed songs that aren't on this list (Wham, Paul McCartney to name some more). Even if it is factually correct, why?! There is no commentary being made here. It's just saying 'look at this, it's not even true but at least I made the boxes red and fucking green'. I wouldn't mind but when I got linked it being told it gives a "staggering" amount of perspective I got pretty annoyed at the steaming turd contained within.

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  170. The UK is not the US, 2:13.

    Ask ALTF.

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  171. What I find striking is Randall says his source is ASCAP, so being mildly curious about the ranking I go to the ASCAP site and find they have an article for the ten most played Christmas songs, and the seventh highest ranking song is supposed to be some nonsense I've never heard called "Do You Hear What I Hear?," and that song doesn't seem to make Randall's chart for some reason. Is this not fascinating?

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  172. David Cameron or Slade & Wizzard & other assorted shite christmas music. Both make living in England fucking awful at the moment. it's hard to decide which is worse.

    It's also hard to work out why xkcd bangs on and on about childhood and forcing everything into stupid generational generalisations. (that's awful. sorry)

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  173. The Tory's fantasy is that everything in the past was less shit because everyone obligingly worked hard and kept to their place. So expect a lot more crap from the past, weaselsoup.

    The Tory party's reality is little more than a collection of special interests who throw just enough bones to maintain power. Whenever there's a mess in Britain, you can trust the British to elect the group representing the people who caused the mess - and to take at least a decade to wake up.

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  174. It's because correlation = causation. HOW MANY TIMES DOES HE HAVE TO TELL YOU?

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  175. http://asofterworld.com/index.php?id=338

    ha this tribute comic is pretty much xkcdsucks

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  176. *correlation = causation = samefag

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  177. Anonymous @ 2:03 said:

    ".....Can you imagine yourself leaving if an Ostracism elected to exile you? Of course you can't....."

    Depends.
    Will they be shards of Greek amphora?
    Oh, and I have no humility.

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  178. Dicksmash McIroncockDecember 9, 2011 at 3:09 PM

    I think ALTF is worse than Hitler. Hitler had his faults, of course, as he himself would be the first to admit. Many of his “Nazi theories” have now been debunked. With the benefit of hindsight his invasion of Russia was ill-conceived, and his scheme to exterminate the “lesser races” has been widely discredited.

    Once you accept his premises though – lebensraum, the supremacy of the Ayran race, et cetera - his actions did have a kind of loony logic. He meant well. ALTF, on the other hand, is working single-mindedly for the triumph of Trolling. Only when you have grasped this does her retardation make any sense.

    Now I’m not trying to defend the Nazis here, don’t get me wrong, but they did at least leave behind Sham Wow. Cameron merely fucked up the Internet, with no compensating benefits. Whether the 4chan rejects “meant well” is beside the point, though in my opinion they did not mean well, but were motivated by malice, hatred of intellectual conversation, and the sheer joy of wrecking.

    Can you imagine ALTF taking responsibility for the state of the Internet, and shooting herself in a burning bunker? Of course you can't. At least Hitler could admit when he was wrong.

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  179. u msisd out a cameron 3:09



    gayyyyyyyyy altf is ther best

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  180. hi im rob, the author of this site, and i herby give up on it forever. i was wrong to insult xkcd and im sorry. everyone please leave and dont post any more comments so i can close the group.

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  181. DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS!

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  182. I leave for two days and this is what I come back to? Fuck this site. Just fuck it, I don't even

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  183. Start a new xkcd-sucks, Raven. Make my dreams come true.

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  184. >The UK is not the US, 2:13., ask ALTF
    >Oh God, the diplomat's whore is back.
    Guys - she's not a fucking brit! She lives in International Falls, Minnesota, as her IP address showed. The only thing of note in said town is a community college. So ALTF is with 90% certainty just some fat pent up (possibly Asian) antisocial college student.

    Given her lack of entertainment I am not surprised at her "trolling" (or lack thereof) here.

    Plus the cameron rant is copied directly from a recent post on 420chan - not a site any English would visit.

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  185. this is the happiest day of my life

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  186. Anon830, i tried that and then quit the internet and left gamer2k4 to manage it for me all by himself. the moral of the story is that i don't care about xkcd that much.

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