Sunday, November 27, 2011

Comics 981-982: Pure, Distilled Boredom

981. Oh, how surprising, Randy is sexually aroused by filesystems. Anything to get it up when Megan isn't lactating, amirite?

982. ha ha ha what if in maths the elements had feelings and could be intimidated???? SO WACKY! also remember the axiom of choice? because i do.

69 comments:

  1. These "two" reviews were the most elegant, well-thought-out, and well-reasoned reviews on this site. Clearly XKCDsucks is where to find intelligent discourse on the internet.

    Although, it could have benefited from more Megan jokes.

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  2. yes, this is why our tagline is "[a] well-reasoned and intelligent collection of discourse about an intellectually and culturally relevant comic"

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  3. basically i just said these were the best two comics since wednesday

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  4. 982 was the biggest piece of shit I've ever seen in XKCD. I thought that 974 was shit, but, boy, was I wrong. This is not a fucking joke on the AoC. It could have worked with anything else. "Goldbach's conjecture says that you can pick a number AND HAVE IT EXECUTED AS AN EXAMPLE TO THE OTHERS HAR HAR HAR". PROTIP: if your joke can be formulated as a snowclone, IT'S PROBABLY NOT FUNNY. Using the axiom of choice here is nothing more than namedropping. XKCD used to have clever jokes about maths.

    Fuck.

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  5. Occam's Razor says that the simplest possible solution SHOULD ALWAYS BE EXECUTED AS AN EXAMPLE TO OTHERS.

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  6. anon 2:25 should be executed as an example to others

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  7. xkcd should be executed as an exemple to others

    wait, it works here

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  8. your mom should be executed as an example to others

    wait, it works here

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  9. your combo should be executed as an example to others

    wait, it works here

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  10. rob should be executed as an example to others

    wait, no!

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  11. anyone who posts here should be executed as an example to others

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  12. except for you, Anonymous 5:29. your contributions are invaluable

    EVERYONE ELSE THOUGH

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  13. ha you go to amirite.net?

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  14. I like to come here to get my daily ego boost. I can think about how much smarter I am now than when I laughed at XKCD jokes without a care in a world and actually had some innocence and happiness left in me.

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  15. *then

    HAHA DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS

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  16. that suck cocks meme should be executed as an example to others

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  17. that executed as an example to others meme should be executed as an example to others

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  18. Finally, a sexkcd! Spotted a typo (availIbility) right away. Even without the typo the caption is all sorts of awkward. At least the alt text was moderately funny.

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  19. for stealing my comment, 10:24 should be executed as an example to others

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  20. ...was panel 1 traced from that pink floyd comic?

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  21. I dont get why they cant just have sex in their own room

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  22. i think they are locked out, presumably by a roommate having sex?

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  23. Two great reviews reminiscent of XKCD Explained.

    But those explorers of the outre couldn't bear contemplating the Necronomicon that is xkcd and fled destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked.

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  24. the actual worst thing about the drawing style is Megan's hair. It's the white gaps that always make it so terrible. Like a comedy bald bloke with an ear to ear combover. it looks like a floor mop or a bundle of spaghetti draped over a beach ball. Or like it's hair that went down the drain and has been fished out again in a big clot and then used to decorate a tomato. This is because he literally draws a lot of lines. And this doesn't work because it's not a visual shorthand. it's the exact opposite of stick figure in other words. And the really crazy stupid thing about it is that when he draws the blonde chick with the ponytail, that looks a bit less shit. I mean still shit, because it's bad enough that the heads are so outsized but why does he feel the need to add hair onto female characters? it makes no sense. presumably the male characters aren't bald.

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  25. This is SO CUTE how they hold hands!

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  26. I always though Nelson Mendela was black. Xkcd proves me wrong again!.

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  27. which one is Mandela? the one with the cracked down the middle head I guess?

    Also this is stupid because why do they not just go & do it in the bathroom.

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  28. Dicksmash McIroncockNovember 28, 2011 at 7:26 AM

    2:51, she's losing her hair because of the chemo, you heartless asshole.

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  29. Yeah but Rob if they lived there they could get in anyway, since keys can unlock that shit (the drawing doesnt show any signs of a catch on the door). Its not your fault it doesnt make sense, its Randall's.

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  30. describe your last poop using a movie title

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  31. Seriously people, what is YOUR obsession with Megan's milk? It is really tiresome to read those lame and predictable comments.

    As for anon 10:25, it could be "Fast and Furious"

    TLC

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  32. Dicksmash McIroncockNovember 28, 2011 at 11:59 AM

    Citizen Kane

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  33. 10:25 - "28 Days Later"

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  34. Gone With the Wind

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  35. How Beige Was My Jacket

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  36. Anonymous 11:43 AM, did you say Megan's Milk????

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  37. Well now we know how randy's fiance got cancer. Must have been all that sex in the particle accelerator tunnel.

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  38. neuromancer? moar liek neuroCANCER amirite?

    also 11:43 not as tiresome as it must be WRITING them amirite?

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  39. Actually, I think he said "Megan's milk", and he's right, you're obsessed with it.

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  40. i just ordered some cheese made from megan's milk and i have never been more excited

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  41. Since when did executing Anon 2:25 as an example to the others become okay?

    I don't think it's okay.

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  42. Also GOOMHR, I've been cock-blocked by Nelson Mandela too.

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  43. GOOMHR I sometimes falsely imply that I was sexually active in college too.

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  44. I'm probably late to the party on this one, but the post-punchline dialogue in 981 ruins it; it might be sort of acceptable if everything after "You're just turned on by file systems" was cut.

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  45. Also the library is my third choice on my "places to have sex list" too, and is closely followed by "accelerator tunnel" and "beaver lodge", GOOMH Randall

    I mean, this comic would be kind of funny in a "ha ha, human nature" way if any of the places after the second were realistic options. As it is it's dumb.

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  46. Megan's milk?

    Do you mean [b][i]Megan Smilk!?[/i][/b]

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  47. I feel like 7:50 was just fucking lazy.

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  48. yes Dicksmash but a/ the drawings have been the same since 2006 which was long before her diagnosis and b/ he is remembering college which was also long before her diagnosis. so ner.

    I used to think there was some skill in the drawings - occasionally there'd be a really expressive line or two. Like in that really creepy one where he's two timing Megan with the blonde ponytail chick, there was something believably revolting in the sex panels. that's all gone now though

    also what is with that fucking horrible font all over his site with those stupid capital letters. it's ugly.

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  49. I came across this blog by chance, and after reading through multiple posts I'm convinced that this is one of the most contemptible sites on the internet I've ever seen. Poking fun at his wife's breast cancer? You can't get much lower.

    Also, some of these complaints are just hollow. Either the people who posted really believe they know what they're talking about, or they're trolls think their humor is worth something. In any case, it comes from people who probably won't do anything significant with their lives.

    For whoever this Rob person is who posts these rants, I'm guessing you haven't really learned much past the high school level. The only validation behind your "festering shit pile" posts that I can come up with is that you somehow get paid for your blogging, whether it be through how many people view it or what have you. If not, than I'm guessing your just another crude and useless writer on the internet who thinks shouting out in the dark to anyone who will listen is worth something. Even your comment of "I am utterly incapable of producing anything creative at all. This is why I criticize things!" and the extrapolation you made to other critics reeks of a deluded sense of a belief that your opinion is right above all else. But again, there's plenty of you on the net.

    As for who I am, I'm an engineering student at a polytechnic university. Everyone here who's heard of xkcd loves the comic, and the majority have. Our school is one of the most difficult in the northeast, so I can assure that in the thousands of us, we aren't all quite as stupid as you claim the fans of xkcd to be.We're the ones who will be making your medicine, your electronics, your homes in the future. True, the art of the comic isn't quite as good as most, that's obvious. But we all can relate to the content cause we've worked for knowledge and a way to give back meaningfully to the world.

    So, you all can go about your profanity-filled, mediocre critiques. In the mean time, the people who xkcd has an influence on will work on how actually make something of themselves.

    Thanks.

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  50. so i take it you didn't do very well in your english classes

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  51. 11:05, your school is one of the most difficult in the northeast [i]for you[/i].

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  52. There's a lot of 'probably's and 'I'm guessing's in there. that's not very scientific

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  53. "I'm an uber-frosh that'll fail organic chem a couple of times before relegating my life to tier-2 tech support"

    FTFY Anon-11:05

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  54. Anonymous Nov 30, 11:05, don't take these persons here too seriously.

    To give you just two beautiful examples of what Rob is capable to write, when someone mentioned that the comic he criticized was in fact good, he said:

    "you cannot like something because you like it; one needs a reason. the reason you like this comic is because you are dumb as shit."

    And, when somebody asked him if he had something personal against Randall Munroe, he said:

    "he raped my daughter"

    So... keep on coming here to question this people but don't have many hopes of making them change their childish behavior, this is mostly a place to throw shit at xkcd and people who likes it.

    I must also say, I find it weird the relation you're trying to establish between "people who creates useful products" and "people who likes xkcd"... I don't quite buy it and besides, that's not even the point. If Rob here was the head of your "department-for-development-of-great-products", his reviews would still be, as you put it, profanity-filled and mediocre.

    Again, keep on coming here, but don't put too much into it, you won't find answers much more valid than "so i take it you didn't do very well in your english classes"

    -------
    A. Fields.

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  55. ""you cannot like something because you like it; one needs a reason. the reason you like this comic is because you are dumb as shit.""

    actually, the whole exchange went like this:

    gamer: I liked this one.
    me: that is because you are dumb as shit.
    gamer: no, it is because I liked it.
    me: you can't like something because you like it etc

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  56. Oh wow, NOW it sounds like an amazing and well thought argument!

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  57. 11:05, I go to Carnegie Mellon, also one of the most difficult universities in the northeast. But, so fucking what? Do you think that because you go to a good school, that makes you an expert on what's funny and what's good art? People adore XKCD here too. Socially retarded nerds everywhere enjoy XKCD, it's a fact of life. They put it on their goddamn t-shirts, they post quotes of it on their facebook statuses, they even (very annoyingly) quote it in conversation.

    I loathe the moment when I'm talking to someone, and they're like "Oh, that reminds me of that XKCD where Randall mentioned this topic in passing." It's like XKCD fans have become one hive mind filled with semi-retarded memes, lame humor, and bad drawings.

    Nerd "culture" is infantile, obtuse, and highly overrated, and XKCD is a perfect example of that.

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  58. Amazed at things youDecember 3, 2011 at 1:59 PM

    Not having a close circle of "nerds", or people like the ones you describe, I haven't witnessed that behavior, which does sound annoying.

    I used to like xkcd a lot a couple of years ago, and lately I like it less. I don't think my tastes have changed, since I still enjoy the strips that I found great then. Maybe his humor is changing or (likely) he's got quite a bit of anguishes now that don't precisely help him to be more focused and creative.

    So, Anonymous 11:25 (the one just above me unless somebody steps in before I finish writing), I agree with the stuff you say about nerd culture. But, don't you think that there is something "infantile, obtuse, and highly overrated" in this blog as well? Namely, the insults, the way the commenters here fantasize about "Randy" doing this and that so they can criticize him and (most of all) the personal attacks (including an obsession with Megan's milk).

    I understand your reasons for disliking xkcd (I sometimes do as well) but sometimes people here are far worse than what they criticize.

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  59. " Oh wow, NOW it sounds like an amazing and well thought argument!"

    wait, you think that is meant to be an argument? what the fuck is wrong with you people?

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  60. Make up your mind. Do you have arguments? Yes or no?

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  61. man, you are really butthurt about that, aren't you?

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  62. Excuse me, what's that about rape??

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  63. "It could have worked with anything else. 'Goldbach's conjecture says...' "

    You just did what you claim he did except that his derives from a layman explanation of the AoC and yours is actually picked out of a hat. For example, I had to look up Goldbach's conjecture to recall what it might be about.

    I've been here a couple of times and it seems like a bunch of crybaby artists who are probably in that 85-90% IQ range and just wish they had either more social skills or more intelligence, you know, SOMETHING to get some pussy.

    Remember kids: troll smarter, not harder.

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