Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Comics 971 and 972: Alternatively Lame

971. Randy is back to his old favorite punching bag of homeopathy in this one! Before I read the alt text, I didn't catch that it was meant to be a jab at homeopathy and figured it was meant to be a satire about anti-consumerism in the key of Cake's "Rock 'n' Roll Lifestyle", which I could have gotten behind.

Then I read the alt text. I don't think Randy has ever more explicitly spelled out what a comic is about, or why he is writing it, in the alt text before. That's a lot of text for an alt text. And then you go back through and read it and it becomes clear that this comic is just another boring, lazy strawman attack on proponents of homeopathy. I don't think this even counts as pandering, but that may just be because I can't bring myself to give a fuck about it.

972. Here's what's happening here. I had to get someone to explain to me why this comic exists, because originally I thought 'surely Randy can't think that being aware of your tongue is that annoying, can he? and even if it is, it's not worth a comic, surely?'

How wrong I was.

Anyway, what's happening here is Randy read this Peanuts comic and decided to copy the joke more or less in its entirety, then, as an Original Twist, he declared that November would be tongue awareness month. That way once you know that you'd spend the whole month being aware of your tongue, and then you'd forget about it as soon as December rolls around. Just like how during breast cancer awareness month, Randy's only thoughts were of breasts and the milky bounty they contain, during tongue awareness month, your only thoughts will be of tongues.

BAM! Month ruined! How d'you like that, you fuckers?

I don't think I need to explain how mind-numbingly stupid this whole 'if I tell you to be aware of your tongue for a whole month, you will be' thing is. It's dumb. It's very, very dumb. This joke is dumb. This meme is dumb. Even the forumites are calling this the worst one of all time. Why the fuck would you intentionally release this as a comic?

82 comments:

  1. Maybe he has an oral fixation.

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  2. Maybe Rob has a dick fixation.

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  3. I've got a floral dick station.

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  4. I've got a moral fixed Asian.

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  5. Usually I don't agree with much on here, but Randall's colossal raging anti-boner for homeopathy bores the snot out of me.

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  6. I guess I can give him credit for at least posting the comic in response to something, instead of just randomly raging against it?

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  7. See, Randall's not only doing a homage to Peanuts. He's also playing with that "awareness month/week/year" thing that has become all the rage of the past decade or two, not to mention giving his readers another opportunity to brag about how obsessive compulsive they are. He's one-upping Mr. Schultz, working on multiple levels at once, thinking outside the box while working within it. This is what comics as they are supposed to be, bitches.

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  8. i don't think you know what a strawman attack is

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  9. http://goatkcd.com/135/

    Funnier than every single XKCD and this site combined.

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  10. I am dipping my penis gingerly into a jar of brine.

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  11. Hey, I was going to drink that, 12:39.

    DID YOU KNOW NOVEMBER IS PENIS DIPPING AWARENESS MONTH? YOU ARE NOW AWARE THAT PENISES CAN BE DIPPED GINGERLY INTO BRINE.

    LOLOL GOOMHR U SO FUNNY

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  12. Okay, the whole breast milk thing? It's so overdone at this point that its inclusion in a given review is more boring than any actual xkcd strip. The fact that this site continues to flog this decayed horse carcass of a joke says more about the contributors here than it does about Randall. It's predictable, it's tedious, and frankly, its overuse single-handedly undermines all your (otherwise legitimate) complaints about Randall's own overused memes and recycled jokes. Please let it go.

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  13. The previous poster's got it right (4:15). As much as xkcd does suck, this blog is only slightly more entertaining. Most criticisms that Rob goes out of his way to formulate on xkcd, can pretty much be equally accused of his own lame humour.

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  14. Enough with the Megan jokes!

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  15. Do rabbits have negroes? I know bees do, hence the whole Africanized honey bee shebang, and so do chickens for what it's worth.

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  16. Gotta congratulate Rob on his epic trolling here. His dedication would be admirable if it weren't so pointless.

    Nobody could be that dumb, to assume the intentions of the writer and get so offended by them. So I figured it was cognitive dissonance. But then I kept reading. Trolling is the only possible cause for this blog.

    I think the last ten years of The Simpsons sucked, but I don't write a blog picking apart every little detail, assuming to know what the writers were thinking and projecting my feelings of superiority on them.

    Kudos on the epic trolling.

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  17. anything that offends me is a troll

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  18. What's ironic is that your insistence that this is trolling is, to me, trolling.

    METATROLLING

    Also, I give you a 2.5/10. Nothing that you've said is new and it seems a rehash of old complaint comments. Try harder next time.

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  19. (The best complaint comment that I've ever seen was in fact in the previous thread. It had a balanced viewpoint and the author didn't delude themselves.)

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  20. From '00 to '05 were, I think, the best Simpsons episodes, but if you made a blog about bashing the most recent few years' episodes, I would most certainly visit regularly.

    Do it, my good faggot.

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  21. God this post just randallized everything with its studip strawman. god damn. pos.

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  22. here's what's difficult about stupid things.

    say some people believe a stupid thing, like the earth is flat. then you make some commentary on how dumb it is. finally, several flat-earthers accuse you of strawmanning because you ridiculed a slightly different version of the flat-earth theory than the one they hold dear.

    whatever any particular person believes about homeopathy, or god, does not change the fact that a very large number of people believe in "medication" with zero active components, or in a bearded man who literally created the world 6000 years ago.

    calling "strawman" out on that is like a nazi calling out "strawman" on Schindler's List because he happens to hate asians more than jews.

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  23. @11:51

    You're seriously a fucking idiot. God doesn't have a beard. He shaved off everything except for his mustache for "Movember". Fuck you're stupid.

    On a different note, I've never been unnerved by the thought of my tongue because I am not a mentally retarded aspie.

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  24. this is offensive to people who don't have tongues

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  25. November 3, 2011 5:16 AM, I agree with you. He creates a whole character ("Randy") and then bludgeons him. Funnily enough, among other things, he accuses "Randy" of using strawman attacks. Go figure...

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  26. you are now aware of your penis

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  27. I wish I had one to be aware of :(

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  28. goomh12:51 i have a penis i am aware of 2

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  29. It's only a dumb joke if his tongue is missing ;)

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  30. goomh anon, my tongue is missing

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  31. Who the fuck isn't aware that they have a tongue? Seriously, i want a list so i can never interact with these people again.

    I didn't think it was possible to lose more respect for randy, but i was wrong.

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  32. sometimes i forget i have a whole body and freak out when i realise i have a hole dedicated for shit release.

    live and let live, semi colons.

    capture, ducko.
    Ducks aren't sentient, maybe they are not aware that they too, have assholes.

    food for thought.

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  33. cptnoremac, you either have unforgivably bad taste or are too young to know any better. The Simpsons peaked in 1996 and has gone consistently downhill since then. There hasn't been an episode that could even reasonably be called "good" since 1999.

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  34. Semicolons... if you think that, did you lose any respect for Charles Schulz after reading the comic in the link above?

    Just wondering.

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  35. HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS

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  36. The joke of 972 is that Randall spent so much time online, that he has became unaware of his vital body parts. So he was unjustifiably annoyed when his roommate reminded him that he did indeed have a tongue.

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  37. i'm not gay but if i was gay i could sure go for a cock right about now

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  38. @4:17

    yes and no. i didn't read the comic at first (just took rob's word for it). I see the peanuts comic more of just linus being the utter failure and fuck up that he is. the joke in the peanuts comic seems to be more of the fact that linus' failure is so complete that he infects lucy and she too becomes a failure (for the moment).

    I don't see the peanuts comic as a reflection of shultz's view of tongues. i DO see randy's abortion (and/or aberration) as a reflection of his own views.

    and i generally do lose respect overall for shultz because he even brought it up at all.

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  39. 2:57

    Um, no, the early episodes are horrible and unrefined. If you laugh at Homer choking Bart for the 50th time more than at Flanders asking permission to borrow his own chainsaw Homer stole, then I feel sorry for you.

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  40. Morons, the Simpsons was only really good for the first three or so seasons. The episode where Homer is ashamed of his family, the episode where Bart ruins thanksgiving, the episode where Bart is wracked with guilt for receiving accolades when he cheated in an exam... this was the era of The Simpsons written for people with an attention span. This was when we really could consider The Simpsons an adult cartoon.

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  41. I should have known better than to click on a link in the comments of a site that would naturally attract trolls together.

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  42. 873 is another "we are so old, x happened y years ago!!!" comic. I think this is the fifth one he has done?

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  43. it's 973 you useless piece of shit

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  44. Another tantalising hint as to who the White Hat Guy truly is. Apparently he's old enough to not possibly be considered part of the MTV generation, which Randall has handily calculated for us as something over 40 (if he was younger he would have figured Megan to be lumping him in with them), and his opinions are always wrong.

    White Hat man comics boil down to "the trouble with old folk today" rants.

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  45. -SAMEFAGS above this line-

    What? The Simpsons is better than ever. Didn't you guffaw when Homer was raped by a panda? I GOOMHGED so hard at that moment. Lousy SAMEFAGS.

    The point of 973 is that words can change with time (?) and how stupid people other than me are (which is, a lot.)

    It is not a good comic as for the first ten seconds I thought White Hat Guy was Black Hat Guy who is Perfect but it was not and White Hat Guy is not so good.

    -SAMEFAGS below this line-

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  46. 973 is a comic that starts off making a clever point, and then goes nowhere. The punchline is useless, and the alt text is terrible. It's just another way of saying 'Gee, can you believe how much time has passed since [X]? Doesn't that make you feel old?' and it's not even done well.

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  47. http://xkcd.com/647/

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  48. That comic came out over two years ago. Hey, doesn't that make you feel old?!

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  49. HOLY SHIT! RANDALL JUST BLEW THIS MYTH WIDE OPEN!

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  50. Also, could Tim B^Uckly drag out CAD anymore.

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  51. Playing a game or doing something on your phone that makes noises means that you have a low attention span?

    Who the fuck knew.

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  52. 973 was Megan's deliciously milky rebuttal to Randy when he asked her to grant him a pornstar daughter.

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  53. scott, you're only complaining because you were beaten by a manchild

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  54. I think this blog is the only place where homeopathy will be stood up for by scientists, and that is a doubly sad state of affairs

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  55. Wow, I know I'm late to the party and all, but the goatkcd for 969 is pretty amazing.

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  56. Overdosing on homeopathic medicine gave James Randi cancer.

    STATISTICAL FACT.

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  57. Surf the random goatkcd's for awhile. A lot of them are hilarious. The one panel comics become pictures of goatse with awesome captions. The multi-panel comics suddenly end on a punchline, a punchline that actually feels like it fits in the comic better than the intended one.

    It's absurd that jamming goatse into anything would improve it, but it's the best thing to ever happen to xkcd.

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  58. goatkcd is overrated. Someone should start a blog about how overrated it is.

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  59. Goomh, Randall, I just saw the Breakfast Club Tuesday night!

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  60. You know, just for fucking once, I'd like to see an xkcd where a female is wrong about something and a male corrects her. Why the hell are women always the more intelligent ones in xkcd comics? Other than because Randall is desperate to portray himself as a feminist so he can get some pussy?

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  61. GOOMHR EARLIER TODAY I NOTICED THAT TIME PASSES LINEARLY

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  62. I have not heard anyone refer to the youth demographic with the term "MTV generation" in at least a decade.

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  63. Okay, the whole "stop with the Megan jokes" thing? It's so overdone at this point that its inclusion in a given comment section is more boring than any actual xkcd review. The fact that this comment section continues to flog this decayed horse carcass of a complaint says more about the contributors here than it does about Rob. It's predictable, it's tedious, and frankly, its overuse single-handedly undermines all your (otherwise legitimate) complaints about Rob's own overused memes and recycled jokes. Please let it go.

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  64. the part that confuses me is that people think my complaints are otherwise legitimate

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  65. 972 would have been better as just the first panel. Kinda like how Zach Weiner makes most of his comics, though obviously not as well.

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  66. http://goatkcd.com/354/

    the best comic strip of all time

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  67. ^ lulz

    Here's a caption one I liked:
    http://goatkcd.com/112/

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  68. Ian, that is b/c I presume you are a regular member of society who does not make his living off of T-Shirt sales.

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  69. Dicksmash McIroncockNovember 4, 2011 at 9:53 PM

    While we're on the subject, I find this one to be hilarious: http://goatkcd.com/843/sfw

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  70. Dicksmash McIroncockNovember 4, 2011 at 9:56 PM

    So is this one. That would be an excellent way to troll JWs who knock on your door.

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  71. People need to stop telling people to stop complaining about Megan jokes. It's getting boring.

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  72. How is 971 a strawman?

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  73. Here's three of my favorites:
    http://goatkcd.com/760
    http://goatkcd.com/876 (this is awesome, the brain is somehow trapped in the ass lolz)
    http://goatkcd.com/855

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  74. @Anon 3:34

    945 comes close. It is also for once a comic that doesn't have a good goatkcd.

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  75. Dicksmash McIroncockNovember 5, 2011 at 6:43 AM

    I swear 857 was made specifically for goatkcd.

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  76. If Randy only became aware within the past couple of days that he has a tongue, why ISN'T that fodder for more Megan humor?

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  77. because cunnilingus is not kosher because it has hooves, marion fagado

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