Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Comics 1023-1025: Xkcd Sucks Dot Tumblr Dot Com

Some reviews for you, including a very special guest review of 1025 by some cuddlefish named CrazyCod (coddlefish?).

1023. Some notes: first, Randy definitely wants you to know that he and his milk plant watch (watched?) Downton Abbey. This is important because last time he told you that he watches this popular British show on PBS he was intentionally getting the name wrong and you guys he was doing it to be funny.
This is one of the many XKCDs where I can see it being funny if it were written by someone who wasn't Randy. The execution is terrible--it reads like a pitch for a joke rather than an actual joke. I can see a number of webcomiceurs (or webcomiceusses) pulling it off. Randy didn't really try. He just described a scenario and said "wouldn't that be funny?

1024. It took me a while to realize that the pond wasn't supposed to be like a bunch of pacmen eating each other or something. I hear rumor that the fanboys think this is brilliant art instead of a passable "I guess you can tell this is supposed to be a pond and it's not fuck-off hideous" drawing.

1025.  [NB. the rest of this post is a guest review -Ed.]

Hello! I’m CrazyCod and I'm just now sending this review of Randy's latest comic-on-the-Internet to Rob (oh god i hope rob posts this i don’t want to have written it for nothing). Apparently, our collective sigh after 1024 turned out not to be a lame throwback to 1000 was loud enough that Randy picked up on it and decided to make 1025 even worse just to spite us.
 
So, let’s get straight to the point. Does 1025 have any comedic merit? I think it is pretty clear that it does not. There are several problems with the comic, the most important of which that it is simply not funny. Randy takes a hackneyed snowclone, which was arguably never funny to begin with, and substitutes it with another snowclone of his own creation. So, instead of “X would be a good name for a band”, we get “X.tumblr.com”! This is supposed to provoke hearty guffaws from the readers.
 
Well, given that my Internet habits revolve almost exclusively around xkcdsucks and assorted pornography, I thought that there might be a joke hidden in there that maybe I was just missing out on. Maybe, like certain bands that people worse than me would derisively attach the label “hipster” to, Tumblr blogs have long and pretentious names. As such, I travelled to the strange land of Tumblr in the hopes of understanding this comic. After navigating through the site’s utterly unintuitive design, I started reading through the blogs’ names, hoping to discover Randy’s source of inspiration. Even after browsing through the most pretentious of categories (I’m looking at you, Art and Film), I failed to find any blog names that were more than six words long, much less awkward, yet complete sentences about raccoon orgies.
 
And that brings us to another issue: the phrase “turns out some raccoons got in and were operating this, like, raccoon sex dungeon” is not funny! It's actually creepy and disgusting! I cannot fathom why anyone would think “that IS a good name for a band!” in the first place, much less make Randy’s mental substitution and think that it is a good name for a Tumblr blog. Most damning is that Randy could have used any other phrase for the “setup”, since the “punchline” works with any phrase whatsoever, but he chose to refer to raccoon orgies. Make of that what you will.
 
I’m not going to criticise the joke’s execution, because the joke itself is so bad that any execution would actually do it honour. The fact that there is a contemplative man saying “dot tumblr dot com” to a woman who is saying clearly inappropriate things to him doesn’t warrant a mention in the context of such a terrible joke. I would like to comment on the alt-text, however, that makes use of the deliciously self-referential idea that there could be a blog called (get this) dot tumblr dot com, because then its URL would be difficult to say out loud. Gee, Randy, that was hilarious when Slashdot did it, back in 1997.
 
I think you will agree with me when I say that a joke is less funny the more broadly applicable it is. As an example, take lightbulb jokes. Lightbulb jokes that can be applied to any group (how many republicans/democrats/whatever does it take to change a lightbulb just one but it doesnt matter they’ll never see the light anyway please like me guys) are infinitely less effective than lightbulb jokes play on a particular group’s characteristics and that wouldn’t work if said group was substituted with any other (how many kids with ADD would take to change a lightbulb HEY LET’S GO RIDE BIKES). Okay, that’s not a particularly funny example, but it gets the point across: change “kids with ADD” for “atheists” and the joke doesn’t work. Much like a friend to everybody is a friend to nobody, a joke that can accommodate any setup isn’t really a joke.

193 comments:

  1. Maybe I'm the first person here to say it but I find jokes that can accommodate any setup really boring. I have started reading hundreds of generic jokes of various lengths and probably finished a dozen throughout my life, not including CrazyCod's review.

    I find it hard to pick up a generic joke without immediately engaging a mindset of, "Here's a consumable that some guy has produced to trigger repetition and/or become memorable. What comfortable template is he creating to enable this?" And that's how my whole generic joke experience goes. Generic jokes makes no point well which can't be better made with reference to specific details. They take me nowhere without giving me the uncomfortable sense that someone thinks that I need be nowhere in particular in order to see something false or escape something true. The generic joke idealises; it romanticises; it preaches. It falls asleep and it dreams. It is a selfish journey stopping nowhere.

    The world already has enough that is beautifully unique and that is abhorrently equally so - and peculiarities are far more challenging to confront. A hole accommodating every shape has always seemed like the easy way in.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Amateur art critique time:

    The drawing in 1024 is just really really bland. Not enough detail, and the drawing consists almost entirely of two very poorly saturated colors. I feel more bored than serene looking at this.

    Another thing that bugs me about it is how it's so vertical; I feel like a wider aspect ratio would have better conveyed getting lost in the breadth of the lake than the really narrow one he used that makes you feel like you're staring down a lake-tunnel or something.

    Also, how am I getting that vantage point? It looks like, up close, I'm staring down at the lake. Firstly, it's incongruous with sitting "by" the lake (it makes me feel like I'm in a boat or something). Secondly, feeling like you're looking down on the lake really takes away from what I'm assuming is supposed to be an intention of the vast serenity of the scene, elevating the viewer to a position of dominion over nature rather than immersion in it.

    ReplyDelete
  3. xkcdsucks.tumblr.com has not been taken yet!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Give it a bit, and some forumite will make it.

      Delete
  4. Damn you.

    Damn you for making me see.

    I hate you and your stupid face and your stupid website for making me see how valueless xkcd has become. In the past I would go to xkcd.com and occasionally chuckle but more often than not simply have no real reaction and move on.

    Now I have no choice but to dissect the comic and figure out why it's not funny.

    You've given me a reason to hate Randall Munroe, myself, and you.

    Damn you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That was harsh.

      Your website is pretty f-ing hilarious.

      I now have it bookmarked directly after xkcd's site in my "webcomics" folder.

      I hope you have a wonderful day.

      Delete
    2. It's been a while since we've converted anybody

      Delete
  5. KONY 2012.

    This is more important than Chris Houlihan's room.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This KONY 2012 shit is hilarious. In about 24 hours, college students across the world have had to take an emotional 180 of self-righteousness so huge, alien civilisations will be bombared by radio signals of Reddit puns, essay comments that go nowhere and dozens of tumblr activist pages, in millions of years time. For centuries, the denizens of these faraway solar systems will be plagued by a psychic cocktail of denial and hubris that threatens to tear apart their fragile societies for no other reason that a failed attempt at band-aid charity.

      Delete
  6. so it has come to this dot tumblr dot com sigh girl look at that body

    ReplyDelete
  7. Is using a joke that someone else has made tantamount to copying if you had no idea the joke existed? 'Cause I've never heard of "hard-to-pronounce-URL" jokes before... Not that they're funny anyway.

    ReplyDelete
  8. What is the point being in the made in the last paragraph? The example about switching "kids with ADD" for "atheists" makes it sound like he's saying a joke isn't funny if it refers to a group that doesn't uniformly have qualities that the punchline depends on? What's the point of making such a point?

    The first and last sentences sound like they're trying to make a different point, to that which exemplified between them. They seem to be saying you have to be making fun of a minority for a joke to be particularly funny and the smaller the minority is the funnier the joke. That's a pretty shitty outlook, dude. Where did you get your sense of humour, a construction yard?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He's saying that jokes that work for anyone are less funny than jokes that work for specific people. The contrast is not between kids with ADD and atheists, it's between the first joke that could work for literally any group and the second joke that only works for one group.

      Also, my troll protection, fuck you I hate you I hate xkcd, it doesn't take up any of my time anyway so there

      Delete
    2. yep, the joke is still exactly as funny if you switch "kids with ADD" for "atheists" because atheists are known for having extremely short attention spans

      Also, ALL jokes make fun of minorities.

      Delete
    3. All lightbulb jokes do. That's their format. Incidentally, they're also a classic example of bad humor.

      All jokes? Not really. Not unless you count animals as a minority. Not unless you count human nature as a minority. Not unless you count objects as minorities. Not unless you count language as a minority. Are jokes hinged on particularity? Do they get worse as their scopes broaden? I really don't think so, but couldn't be fucked proving it.

      What I'm saying is, I don't know what the fuck 8:04 is going on about for the most part but he's right about CrazyCod making a pretty spurious claim.

      Delete
  9. You seem to have missed the important point here that the website was not supposed to be "TurnsOutSomeRaccoonsGotInAndWereOperatingThisLikeRaccoonSexDungeon.tumblr.com". It was just supposed to be "RaccoonSexDungeon.tumblr.com", a URL which is indeed already taken. THIS was the point of the joke, that weird short phrases like "raccoon sex dungeon" could set the theme for a tumblr blog, much the same as they could make good names for grunge garage bands.

    This is actually a fair bit of observational humor. However, the real problem with the joke is not that it sets up an inconceivable situation so much as it claims that these are the only real blogs which populate tumblr. I may be wrong on this point, but I think that while tumblr may have a number of freaky blogs like this, the majority of its blogs are reserved for personals, fan art, and porn. That has certainly been the case in my experience.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Taken as of two days ago. See what xkcd inspires, and shudder.

      1026 was a bit of a mixed experience. I laughed at the category of "short", but felt it quickly went downhill, finishing with a vertical drop in the final two categories. It was with some surprise therefore that I found myself having the biggest laugh at the alt-text.

      Delete
  10. xkcdsucks.tumblr.com exists now. It is probably not good, but since you are reading this I assume you have nothing better to do, so click on it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That site sucks because it doesn't have a comment thread. No one would read this site if it wasn't for the hilarious comment threads. Another reason why Tumblr sucks is the general lack of them (you CAN add a comment thread, but hardly anyone bothers).

      Delete
    2. you are supposed to get your own blog, it's just a different kind of blogging. More one-on-one interaction than a normal blog.

      Delete
  11. Thank you for posting a review of 1022-1024. He did nothing for the momentous 1024 milestone, so now I can go kill myself. I have read an actual 1024 Xkcd comics. I read Xkcd 1025 as well but only to make up for the horribly long 980, the only Xkcd in the history of Xkcd that I have not read - and never will. This is of course not counting 1026 and everything else after this.

    Stay strong people. Fight the good fight. I vow to butcher any Xkcd fans I meet IRL to stop the abominable takeover of Randull's pseudoreality, assuming there are any on the way to my suicide.

    RIP Anonymous, 1XXX-2012.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Creepy raccoons are funny when Dinosaur Comics does it.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Remember when you were learning about Shakespeare in high school and made all the obvious jokes about his famous lines? Randall does!

    2B or HB, that is the question.

    ReplyDelete
  14. The hideous truth behind 1025 is that Randall wants to create a meme of saying 'dot tumblr dot com' in general conversation.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Isn't it fucking enough that replying 'girllookatthatbody' has already become a shitty meme? When will Randall stop polluting the internet with his ridiculous bullshit?

      Delete
    2. What? It actually caught on? No way!

      Delete
  15. 'difficult to focus on work while i'm in'
    ew. that's disgusting. and stupid. is he trying to tell us he has to think about work while shagging because he has a bit of a problem. or is he just trying to make sure everyone knows that he's getting some because it's been about 3 comics since he last mentioned it

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. shut up weaselsoup (dot tumblr dot com), it's very important that we hear that Randall is having sex with his cancerous girlfriend. Onyl some kind of mentally retaredified idiot would not realise this

      Mr Munroe has a very sophisticated sense of humor, as can be seen in the most recent comic where he talks about shakespeare. I mean, come on, SHAKESPEARE. Doesn't get more high brow than that.

      Delete
    2. Shall I compare thee to a fascist dictator?
      Thou art as lovely and as temperate.

      Delete
    3. That's not nearly as offensive as a comic claiming to be about language thinking it's okay to say "I'm in a summer's day." In fact, it's much more common (I did the math and I found it to be exactly 1 infinity times more common) to say a summer's day is short, but Randall thinks that can't happen. It must be summer because he certainly didn't focus on this comic.

      Delete
    4. Look, when you have a great joke like referring to yourself being inside a girl, you're entitled to fudge grammar a little bit to make it work.

      Delete
    5. But he fudged the grammar WRONG. It took me seeing 7:04's commment to figure out exactly what the joke was supposed to be.

      I read the "in" for a summer's day as meaning "temporally situated in", i.e., it's difficult to concentrate on work all summer long. What Randall should have said is "inside". It's difficult to concentrate on work when you're stuck indoors and the weather is nice outdoors. Indoors doesn't work with the sex reference, but "inside" works for the sex and also makes it clear that he's talking about physical location (not place in time) for the summer's day.

      Delete
  16. So. It has come to this.

    Dot tumblr dot com.

    Also, am i the only one thinking this guest review is just as bad a the comic itself ? I mean, it's like a hundred pages long saying basically "hey it's not funny, but look at me how quirky i am and everything". Where's the rage ? There's even less interest than fat rob's review, while being 10 times as long.

    I'm going to create xkcdsucksguestreviewssucks.

    Dot tumblr dot com, obviously.


    Also, wtf is wrong with 1026 ? Who the fuck is "thee" supposed to be, his milk pump ?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Years of empirical analysis have allowed Rob to determine that people only read the first couple of sentences of the review for each strip and then move on to enjoying and augmenting the panoply of hate in the comments.

      Also I've just discovered that my creepy junkie stalker who I've known since childhood has just started a PhD programme. PhDs are officially meaningless.

      Delete
    2. I hope on xkcdsucksguestreviewssucks (hey where's your subject-verb agreement, prick?) you don't continue putting spaces before question marks like some kind of retarded Frenchman.

      Delete
  17. xkcd sucks dot blogspot dot com dot tumblr dot com

    ReplyDelete
  18. chris houlihan's room

    ReplyDelete
  19. CrazyCod's guest review is fucking terrible. I'm not even trying to be intentionally vitriolic on the internet, here. It's just plain bad.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anon7:50's comment is fucking terrible. I'm not even trying to be intentionally vitriolic on the internet, here. It's just plain bad.

      Delete
    2. Anon2:32's comment is fucking terrible. I'm not even trying to be intentionally vitriolic on the internet, here. It's just plain bad.

      Delete
    3. Jon Levi's comment is fucking terrible. I'm not even trying to be intentionally vitriolic on the internet, here. It's just plain bad.

      Delete
    4. CrazyCod's guest review is fucking terrible. I'm not even trying to be intentionally vitriolic on the internet, here. It's just plain bad.

      Delete
    5. Repetition is fucking terrible. I'm not even trying to be intentionally vitriolic on the internet, here. It's just plain bad.

      Delete
  20. is fucking terrible. I'm not even trying to be intentionally vitriolic on the internet, here. It's just plain bad. is fucking terrible. I'm not even trying to be intentionally vitriolic on the internet, here. It's just plain bad.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i meant to post that in response to the other thing oops brb cutting

      Delete
  21. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  22. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  23. This comment has been removed by Rob

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. in my defense, this comment really sucked

      Delete
    2. Rob has been removed by this comment

      Delete
    3. This comment has been removed by this comment.

      Delete
    4. Rob actually couldn't be removed because of his fatness.

      Delete
    5. Rob has been liposuctioned by this comment.

      Delete
    6. The previous comment has been eaten by Rob.

      Delete
    7. This criticism has been removed by Randall.

      Delete
  24. How many ska fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

    One to break it and three to pick it up pick it up pick it up

    ReplyDelete
  25. Yeah. I know a lake like that. Not much more than a pond. Sheltered from the wind on most days.

    A magical place. I like the Lilies that float on the water. They do get thick sometimes.

    Used Book stores have books like that. It's true. Some do.

    The numbers can be used any way you want to use them.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah. I know a comic like that. Not much more than a meme generator. Sheltered from humor most days.

      A horrible place. I like the post-punchline dialogue that follows the comic. It does get thick sometimes.

      Used Book stores have books of that comic. It's true. Some do.

      The "jokes" can be used any way you want to use them.

      Delete
    2. Yeah. I know a blog like that. Not much more than a copy pasta generator. Sheltered from intelligent conversation on most days.

      A tiny place. I like the few users that still make milk jokes. It does get thick sometimes.

      4Chan users have conversations like that. It's true. Some do.

      The blagosphere can be used any way you want to use it.

      Delete
  26. i am fucking onto you crazycod
    stop plugging the adventures of roflcat on xkcdsucks

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am actually and honestly CrazyCod and I have no idea what you're talking about. I honestly just wrote a very bad review and rob just posted it

      Delete
  27. Comic 1026- The milk of human unkindness

    Randall phoned this one in. You can just tell.

    The comic initially confused me, because I thought THEE was some kind of stupid nerd drug. Congratulations stupid anons for calling me an idiot, it's appreciated.

    The line, of course, is from Shakespeare's Macbeth, but it is clear that Randy knows nothing about it beyond that, not even the following lines ("thou art more lovely and more temperate"). There is an inherent laziness and incompetency here, which is even more baffling because it means Randall didn't even have time to wikipedia it for stupid factoids. Maybe Shakespeare is a liberal arts. We know Munroe would only read Shakespeare for two reasons: pseudointellectual pandering and to test this.

    I will not be cheap and mention Megan's hot, sticky milk or what Randall's aping of a homoerotic love poem could mean for the author.

    I will however stoop so low as to state that this is Randy's idea of a love poem. A table. HOW QUIRKY.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What the hell is wrong with you ? Making a review of a xkcd ? That's not what this blog is for.

      What this blog IS for though, is putting space before our question marks like respectable frenchmen.

      Delete
    2. A respectable frenchman is like identifying your father.

      Never going to happen.

      AM I RITE?

      Delete
  28. Bob phoned this comment in, you can just tell.

    The line, of course, is from Shakespeare's 18th sonnet, but it is clear that Bob knows nothing about it beyond that, apart from the following line (thou art more lovely and more temperate). There is an inherent laziness and incompetency here, which is even more baffling as it means Bob didn't even have time to Wikipedia it for factual accuracy before posting. Maybe Shakespeare is liberal arts. We all know Free would only read Shakespeare for two reasons: pseudointellectual pandering and posting this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was on the point of making a reply like yours, then I figured that making a basic error of Shakespeare is the liberal-arts-trolling equivalent of a basic arithmetic slip to enrage geeks.

      Out, damned spot! out, I say!

      Delete
    2. I didn't even hesitate before ignoring it. Saying "of course" while making a rudimentary error is so clear a sign that he did it on purpose that it would be difficult to believe he actually intended to troll if not for 10:32. Unless 10:32 is a troll?

      The internet got kind of stupid when everything became a game of Spot the Troll.

      Delete
    3. 50% of the world is always up to something, and the other 50% has to waste its time figuring out (1) who the other 50% are; (2) what they're up to. This is why evil will triumph over good: good is always playing catchup.

      "Spot the Troll" is just another information superhighway mirroring of real life.

      captcha: focial ntarde. Popular diagnoses from politically incorrect, dyslexic optometrists.

      Delete
  29. ohmygod you made a mistake you failed to grammar the parentheses properly you massive idiot

    ReplyDelete
  30. Why does everyone think that the level of English is the most accurate indication of someone's intelligence?

    On the Internet, making a grammar error makes you some sort of retard, and everyone likes to go round correcting every mistake they see, because they'll be seen a geniuses.

    You think people who use text speak on facebook walls are idiots? If you actually had any non-idiot friends, you'd know that a lot of intelligent, educated people use text speak.

    From my experience, those who type properly with caps and punctuation are mostly pseudointellectual drop outs, artistic liberals, etc.

    On the other hand, being bad at math is totally cool: "I'm so terrible at math I can't even add lololol," when mathematical ability correlates directly with intelligence, and skipping it serves no intelligible purpose.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. y ev1 tnk dat lvl Eng most acur8 indic8n inteliganzs?

      on net gramar err = retard + ev1 corect all coz = geniuis.

      u thnk facebk wall txtrs r dumb? if u had non r-tard bros ud no sum txtrs r inteligant+educ8d.

      imho caps+punc => dropout/artfag/ect

      otoh bad math = COOL "math so hard cant ++ LOLOL" but math~inteliganzs + y skip it?

      Delete
    2. Clearly 12:49, Newton, et al. are clinical morons (ever read Opticks? anyone who can empirically reveal a complex subject for the first time with such elegance is clearly a special needs case), while 12:57 and the guy who would write F U on the stalls at school are GOD DAMN INTELLECTUAL TYRANNOSAURI.

      Delete
    3. Why does everyone think that the level of math is the most accurate indication of someone's intelligence?

      On the Internet, making a arithmetic error makes you some sort of retard, and everyone likes to go round correcting every mistake they see, because they'll be seen a geniuses.

      You think people who skip numbers when counting facebook friends are idiots? If you actually had any non-idiot friends, you'd know that a lot of intelligent, educated people skip numbers.

      From my experience, those who add properly with carrying and orders of operations are mostly pseudointellectual drop outs, autistic liberals, etc.

      On the other hand, being bad at English is totally cool: "i so teribal at inglesh i cant even spel lololol!11!1," when communication abilities correlate directly with intelligence, and skipping them serves no intelligible purpose.

      Delete
    4. When will missing the point be recognized as an official sport?

      Delete
  31. Tyrannosaurus is not a Latin word, as would be conjugated "us, i" in the nominative singular and plural respectively, but a word based off the Greek "τύραννος + σαῦρος", which would form "Tyrannosauroi" in the plural.

    And, saying this as the composer of the rant abovementioned, I can thus conclude that I am of superior intelligence to you. Quod ipse demonstrandum, ladies and gentlemen.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. >noun
      >conjugated

      Also, you only wrote half that rant. The other half is a copy-paste of a post I recall making.

      I'm also the first person here to say this and the guy who keeps stalking weaselsoup because she brings to mind the homely VIth form girls in the Latin classroom awaking Lazarus within me.

      However, recalling the worst exam I ever passed, I give you 52% because your subject matter isn't entirely annoying.

      Delete
    2. i missed this. how come this appeared above my post. anyway. stalking! homely! nice.

      Delete
    3. "Homely" in the "place or surroundings" sense, of course. I never understood why homeliness should be an insult.

      Delete
    4. perhaps it's a 'neg'

      Delete
  32. ooh are you the bloke who was going on a while ago about being able to speak ancient Greek fluently. i wondered what happened to you.

    is that a 'deliberate mistake' there along the lines of what someone said above 'liberal-arts-trolling equivalent of a basic arithmetic slip' ??

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. O! mustelid broth, my love for you allows me to pray to the spirit of eternal beauty and tenderness mirrored in your eyes or fling you down under me on that softy belly of yours and fuck you up behind, like a hog riding a sow, glorying in the very stink and sweat that rises from your arse, glorying in the open shape of your upturned dress and white girlish drawers and in the confusion of your flushed cheeks and tangled hair. It allows me to burst into tears of pity and love at some slight word, to tremble with love for you at the sounding of some chord or cadence of music or to lie heads and tails with you feeling your fingers fondling and tickling my ballocks or stuck up in me behind and your hot lips sucking off my cock while my head is wedged in between your fat thighs, my hands clutching the round cushions of your bum and my tongue licking ravenously up your rank red cunt. I have taught you almost to swoon at the hearing of my voice singing or murmuring to your soul the passion and sorrow and mystery of life and at the same time have taught you to make filthy signs to me with your lips and tongue, to provoke me by obscene touches and noises, and even to do in my presence the most shameful and filthy act of the body. You remember the day you pulled up your clothes and let me lie under you looking up at you while you did it? Then you were ashamed even to meet my eyes.

      <3

      Delete
    2. joyce was a filthy old perv wasn't he.

      Delete
    3. Well, Joyce was male - a touch more articulate than average and a lot worse at hiding the evidence, but male nonetheless. If you prefer your piss diluted with wine, there's always contemporary Ellis' urolagnia.

      Fewer chance of virii from the front bottom, anyhow.

      Delete
    4. don't get me wrong, Joyce's attitude is a much more reassuring species of perviness than the ones it's generally dictated that men should have these days. imagine being told it's ok, let alone attractive, to be fat/hairy/smelly in any way.

      i bloody wish that men shared some of his attitude. i'm not saying you'd want to have to deal with a lot of the stuff he expressed interest in - you wouldn't, mostly, unless that was your actual personal thing too - but all i ever hear is porn-influenced bullshit like 'yeah but she's a bit fat so i can't like her' and 'i won't sleep with any woman who won't shave her bits'. and it would be nice if that was a bit less prevalent

      Delete
    5. I like all kinds of so-called defects, but women don't want anything to do with me because I'm gormless and the type of creep who doesn't find freaky stuff unattractive. Judgmental bitches.

      Delete
    6. you want to read xkcd today, it is full of tips for picking up chicks

      Delete
  33. chris houlihan's room

    ReplyDelete
  34. ATTENTION WOMEN! I RANDALL MUNROE AM STANDING UP FOR YOU AND SPEAKING AGAINST THE PHENOMENON KNOWN AS NEGGING. I HAVE ALSO CREATED A CHARACTER OF YOUR APPROXIMATE GENDER WHO TAKES VICTORY OVER THE MALE CHARACTER WHO HAS ATTEMPTED THIS DESPICABLE PRACTICE. APPRECIATE ME. IN CASE YOU WERE WONDERING I AM THE SENSIBLE MALE APPROXIMATION IN THE FIRST PANEL. I SUPPORT YOU. NOT NEGGING.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That should have been the comic's hover text. That's the only thing that could have redeemed it.

      Delete
    2. WOMEN! YOU ARE SO HELPLESS YOU NEED ME TO WHITE KNIGHT YOU.

      Delete
  35. Well Pick Up Artists are generally pretty stupid but yep, this is another "Randy defeats a Strawman in an unrealistic way" comic

    ReplyDelete
  36. That is a pretty fucking stupid comic, but I did like the second to last panel. Too bad the last panel ruined it and the rest of the comic was equally worthless.

    ReplyDelete
  37. blah blah i know all about women i married one once they don't like being insulted that's just not cool blah blah hey girls check it out i'm really sensitive and will probably be on the lookout for somebody new after a few more rounds of chemotherapy watch this space blah blah

    BORING!

    More interesting is Black Hat Guy. Why didn't he order a meal? Why is he just staring at her in a contemplative pose while she eats? Pretty creepy guy! Is this how Randall has dates?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The comic would have been better if instead of the final fram we saw black hat guy leaving the women's bathroom with a blood soaked bowling ball. I mean... to really show how NOT-SEXIST Randal is.

      Delete
  38. Good review, CrazyCod!

    ReplyDelete
  39. Maybe I'm the first person to notice this but the penultimate panel is a rehash of my rehash of 933.

    It is interesting to note that the penultimate panel in my rehash is the only one I did not change from the original 933. It is becoming clear that Randall has a "holding me back" complex, Cancer Girlfriend being his excuse for his own pathetic life.

    ReplyDelete
  40. It would have actually been funnier if the guy was just like, "Whatever, bitch, I'll just go hit on those other chicks" because it would have been an ironic subversion of the painfully contrived circumstance and the profoundly unrealistic and stupid "shutdown." It might have also better represented the demographic randull is trying to criticize

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Now with an updated central panel.

      Thanks everyone your creative input made my Friday worth living through.

      Delete
    2. Read "The Game" by Neil Strauss if you want tips on how to liven up your Fridays.

      Delete
  41. PUAs seem kinda like 4chan to me. Members of these internet subcultures think they're all underground and stealthy, when actually, anybody who's at all immersed in internet culture as a whole as well aware of them.

    The basis of much of Randall's humor is dropping "obscure" references with no explanation so the people who get the reference can feel superior. He doesn't do that here; instead we're treated to an explanation of PUA and negging. What's the matter Randall? Worried your "smart" readers won't get it? Nope, Randall is secretly a misogynist; he doesn't trust his female readers enough to assume they've already come across discussions of PUA and negging, so he needs to explain it for their protection.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Women exist only to be milked in Randall's world.

      Delete
    2. In Randall's world, women exist only to be milked?

      Or women everywhere only exist to be transported to Randall's world for milking?

      Delete
    3. Seriously, this (and I hesitate to call it a) joke doesn't even make sense. Now, most of the comments on here don't make sense, so thats ok. But at least they can appear relevant. Milk has no relation to anything anymore, if it ever did. Saying Randall is obsessed with milk is like saying 10:44 has a midget fetish, in that it would be weird and laughable if it was true, but is almost certainly not.

      10:44 in particular, how do you know what Randall's world is like, presupposing that he has his own? How would people in such a world reproduce, if women existed only to be milked? Your comment is baseless, irrelevant, unfunny, and poorly worded.

      As to 9:29, would you prefer he explained the reference, or not? Or do you just hate it both ways? Sometimes jokes require other knowledge, such as that of PUAs. Personally, I recognized the reference (cracked.com article), but he explained it well for people that did't. If he didn't explain it, then most people probably wouldn't get the joke, and you would complain that it was pandering, or at least required knowledge of an obscure part of the internet.

      Randall isn't claiming his readers are "smart," and intelligence really has no effect on knowledge of the pick-up community anyway.

      Delete
    4. Man, you really seem to have a thing for midgets.

      Delete
    5. >Personally, I recognized the reference (cracked.com article)

      Cuddlefish shall not live by bread alone, but by recognising every term that is repeated at the hand of Randall.

      Delete
    6. I read the article before ever reading xkcd, but good try.

      Delete
    7. Just to piss off people who actually try analyzing these comments like they're somehow relevant:

      Milk. Milk Milk Milk, Randall loves Milk. Randall loves Milking Women. Randall loves women's milk. Milk Milk Milk. Randall's wife is no longer milk-producing, so he's resorted to whining about it in the medium of a webcomic.

      There. Deep enough for you, 2:38? If not, I really don't care.

      Delete
  42. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  43. POLL CLOSED! Your votes have been counted and verified, and I can now reveal that the winner of the best copypasta rant of last thread is...

    "Maybe I'm the first person here to say it" memes

    Congratulations to Anon 6:59, whose creative meta-rant has entered the Xkcdsucks Hall Of Fame with a whopping 16 VOTES!

    An honourable mention to all our runners up, in descending order:

    2nd place: 'Anon@10:14' by Anon 2:00 - 15 votes!
    3rd place: 'criticism of Rob's reviews' by Anon 8:05 - 12 votes!
    4th place (tie): 'personal hygiene' by Anon 8:32 - 11 votes!
    4th place (tie): 'TVTropes' by Jon Levi - 11 votes (two of which were from me)!
    6th place: 'German Capitalisation' by Anon 3:04 - 9 votes!
    7th place (tie): 'sitting in the corner' by Anon 10:25 - 8 votes!
    7th place (tie): 'pasta' by Anon 11:26 - 8 votes!
    9th place (tie): '24-hour days' by Rob - 6 votes!
    9th place (tie): 'this blog' by Anon 7:23 - 6 votes!
    11th place (tie): 'time' by Anon 6:56 - 5 votes!
    11th place (tie): 'life' by Anon 11:25 - 5 votes!

    Many thanks to the voters and submitters for making this poll happen. I could not have done it without you. Special thanks to Anon 6:39 for starting this amazing meme. And congratulations to every single member of the wonderful Xkcdsucks community. Give yourselves a round of cheers for participation! You guys truly are the best!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Where's my thanks?

      Delete
    2. I'm listed as Anon 10:25? How did you know my secret identity?

      Delete
    3. Before I give this award to Anon 6:59 I should like as the author of Anon 6:39 to say a few things.

      Looking at my various posts on the 1000th strip thread, I see I was really on a roll that day. I just looked through them again and made myself laugh out loud, something which happens maybe only four times on a particularly funny year.

      I would like to thank Michael for being such low-hanging fruit and for finally reversing his name at my request - he seems a cool guy really. I should also express my gratitude to people who self-diagnose with Asperger syndrome and then use it as an excuse to behave in such a predictable and offensive way - never was so much mockery owed to so many by so many. I must take the opportunity to express my respect for the patience of the genuinely autistic, now unlikely to suffer a better fate than disabled asylum seekers in a galley where all the officers look through rolled up copies of the Daily Mail instead of telescopes.

      I would like to thank weaselsoup for several times pointing out the object of my posts, and Rob for teaching me how disarming it can be to respond to an angry rant with a single sentence strawman.

      Finally, I should like to thank my mother, who well before my balls had dropped took me to an Any Questions?. As part of sufficiently elegant rhetoric as to bring about no consequences, she referred to the seated Chancellor Norman Lamont and his Cabinet as "the bastards". Without this episode I would not have learnt the importance of engaging in a continual stream of entertaining but ultimately impotent subversions.

      Bringing me back to the Daily Mail, I recently dug up a cutting of an article in which I was featured for some academic prize, and decided to dress like a tramp while the other boys and girls had their smartest suits on. I stood out sufficiently that I was asked to make an impromptu waffle just after the Secretary of State for Education's attendance and in front of the Director of the CBI, giving an account of the opportunities for those with non-traditional backgrounds. As a minor public school scholar and returning to my plummy accent, I did my very best. Did no-one tell them that only aristocrats dress up threadbare?

      So, ladies and gentlemen, whether you're just finishing your PhD, earning your first million or simply wasting half an hour anonymously on some hate forum on the Internet, remember: you can't change the world but you can change your perception of it.

      I now ask Anon 6:39 to come up to the podium to collect his well-earned prize, a £10 gift certificate at Woolworths. Thank you very much.

      Delete
    4. 6:59, even. Only an insane narcissist would invite himself to where he already is.

      Delete
    5. Hi, i'm Anon@10:14.

      I just wanted to say that you people voted a French for second.

      So from now on, everyone should put spaces before their question marks, okay ?

      Delete
    6. Hi! Anon@6:39 again. With agriculture subsidies you've broken out farming industry; with EDF you've taken over our energy supply; with ATOS you've redirected £600/million of welfare to a single private French company. France already owns the parts of Britain not in the hands of Germany or America, and underlying France's success is its ability to keep quiet about it.

      So I propose that you allow us to continue putting our question marks straight after non-whitespace, and let us wallow in our ignorance.

      Congratulations and regards.

      Delete
    7. you're welcome, even though i don't know what 'pointing out the object of your posts' means. i'm just happy to be mentioned in the same paragraph as Rob, on whom i have quite a crush still

      Delete
    8. At least three times here you've picked up on one of my posts and suggested that it should probably be taken as mimickry rather than on face value. For whatever reason, I remembered this.

      Yeah, Rob's cute. Looks a little young for me now, but I wouldn't have said no a few years ago. Somewhat aloof. Clearly able to express himself, so I expect it's more nerves than anything. Maybe I should offer to write you a reference if it helps your application for affection...

      On second thoughts, I'll plagiarise.

      Then I said to my heart, why shouldst thou conceal
      The sweetest of passions, the love which you feel -
      Yes, fly wanton muse, and proclaim it around,
      The weasel has lov'd, and her Robdall has found;
      The coy one so artful, who sweetly denies,
      And from the soft flame, but to heighten it, flies.

      Delete
    9. oh right, sorry, see what you mean.
      & aw, Pliny. imagine if we could read Gallus.

      Delete
    10. ANON6:59 2012

      Delete
    11. 2012 ? You mean the french elections for president ?

      Delete
    12. no he means we have to get 6:59 for his crimes

      Delete
    13. fuck i hate the french

      Delete
  44. > fifteen-page comment thread

    This is bullshit. So we are suppose to equate ANY AND ALL attempts to pick up, go out with, or otherwise "score" with a girl as misogyny against or objectification of women? Further, we are also suppose to believe that acting on these ideas is simply a mental defect in our brains completely insurmountable; ie. If you cannot get a girlfriend, its because there is something wrong with your brain?

    In an ideal world you'd be able to be honest and straight with women about your intentions and eventually everything would work out. Do you want to date? You would get a simple yes/no answer. You want casual sex? Also a yes/no answer. ANY guy who has put himself out there knows this peaches and roses scenario does not exist and never will. You have to be cool. You have to be smooth. You have to pretend not to care. You have to flirt. You have to act natural at the same time. etc.

    He does not realize it but the "pick-up artist" of this comic is actually the winner here. This woman he's taken an interest in has proven herself to be an utter bitch. Better to be single than to be with a stuck-up snot who believes in some sort of genetic superiority based on intellect (the foundation of said belief being completely rooted in pseudo-science).

    With all due respect- actually, fuck that. Fuck you, Randall. I don't care if I get banned since I don't care to read your comic EVER again. This is too close to home. Bookmark deleted; no more recommendations.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 1) As always, it depends. Some men/women like the flirty mating dance; some are perfectly OK with or even happier with direct honesty;

      2) Randy's message is quite simple: "I engage in chronic Pick-Up Artist behaviour. The best way I'm going to hide this is by caricaturing the behaviour and then tearing it down. This means I'll have LOADS of girls waiting for me when my wife dies of cancer";

      3) Indeed, the woman's depicted as a far worse person. He couldn't have made it more obvious if the man had suggested they hurl spitballs from a bridge and she responds by saying that he's an awful person and that she'd rather set fire to the homeless;

      4) xkcd is great to read. It's like watching a Holocaust movie over and over just to be reminded how much support can stand behind something so awful.

      Delete
  45. Okay, the real problem with 1027 is that it's mocking a strawman that doesn't exist. I have never heard the term 'pickup artist' before. I have seen that character type on a few sitcoms. Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother comes to mind, but even he wouldn't describe himself as an artist. Wait, yes, he would, but that's just Barney. Half the time he's portrayed as kinda sociopathic. Do people like him really get taken seriously in the real world?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How many people do you know? People like this are pretty common. Successful pickup artists (not generally called as such, that's true) are less common, but overconfident failures that ineptly try to emulate their tactics can be found in pretty much every bar on a Saturday night.

      Delete
    2. ...in the US. In Britland, people will not contemplate even talking about sex until they are drunk enough to forget the shame.

      And that is how it should be, you filthy, rutting, foreign animals.

      Delete
  46. You are wrong Levi. 'The Game' by Neil Strauss. People pay thousands of $ to be taught by the so called 'gurus' on how to pick up women.
    Think before you speak you idiot!

    ReplyDelete
  47. randall fail to realise that his white knighting is just the same dehumanising behaviour in the opposite direction. yeah, making up terms and strategies* to get women to sleep with you instead of trying to be genuinely appealing is awful but so is being a Nice Guy who worships them

    *i can't help but think of troper tales' legion of manipulative asocial chessmasters who claim to know everything there is to know about people

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Another thing he probably fails to realise is that a lot of women enjoy playing "the game" too. They want people to try them out. They are good at flirting and want to flirt with other people who are good at flirting, and they don't mind the ultimate object being sex. What was a massive part of women's liberation? The recognition of their ability to enjoy and even want sex!

      Not all pickup techniques involve belittling the subject. Randall just cherry picked a particularly damning example to underscore his argument about objectively trying to pick people up being adverserial. It's mostly about ways of appearing charming enough that the female feels inclined to have a casual encounter. We all do it to some extent, even if subconsciously. When approaching a new female you only have a few minutes to get her attention, and unless you're Adonis you're not going to do it by acting like you're shooting the breeze around the water cooler. Some people just analyse the techniques that work and attempt to get it down to a science.

      Well, I say "we all do it," but there are those spineless types who never take a chance with strangers and try to sort of slide into relationships with people they've happened to have been friends with for at least a couple of months. I guess the idea of picking up might seem perverse to such people.

      Delete
  48. > Apparently, our collective sigh

    -girllookatthatbody

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So.

      It has come to this.

      Delete
    2. dot tumblr dot com

      Delete
  49. chris houlihan's room

    ReplyDelete
  50. haha check it out guys! The xkcd forum now has it so that every instance of the word "pickup" is displayed as "noespick"!!!!! Randall really stuck it to those manipulative cunts! ROFL! Serves them right for not respecting mankind's true masters.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. no spick?

      fucking racists

      Delete
    2. As a spick I demand an immediate and search and replace with noesnigger. Bah, I'm tired.

      captcha: onalabl. White triangle for masturbators.

      Delete
  51. Fucking sad. I come here to get AWAY from the retarded meme-spouting circlejerkery that pervades the rest of the internet and yet even here there are people posting unfunny memes like this "chris houlihan's room" bullshit over and over again. If it isn't funny when Randall does it, why the fuck would it be funny when you do it? Oh wait, it's because YOUR memes are fucking hilarious, unlike Randall's, right? At least Randall tries to make jokes out of the stupid shit he posts, unlike 99% of the people who post on this blog. But so long as you're doing it in an attitude of ironic disdain, it's okay, right?

    This blog has gone down the fucking drain. Not that it was particularly good to begin with, but at least there used to be decent criticism instead of the constant "lol breast milk" and "lol white knight randall" and asinine meme parroting. I don't think I'll be reading here for quite a while, at least not until Randall does something that particularly ruffles my feathers again. Which, really, he hasn't done in quite a while, not counting yesterday's strip.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So.

      It has come to this.

      Delete
    2. Annoying terms you have used:

      "fucking sad"
      "retarded"
      "circlejerkery"
      "unfunny"
      "meme" <-- the use of this word and the culture surrounding it is to me the most annoying meme of all
      ", right?" x2
      "99% of people"
      "ironic disdain" (any American use of "ironic" is wrong)
      "asinine" (is this like an "SAT" word or something? Yankees use it all the time)

      Annoying patterns you have used:

      - starting a post with short cussing sentence fragment
      - doing THIS to make it TOTALLY clear WHAT you THINK
      - rhetorical question followed by "Oh wait, ..." (makes me imagine you with taped thick-rimmed glasses, snorting)
      - X is not like it used to be
      - X was never good
      - i like [target of X] anyway
      - leaving X forever.

      You won't be missed.

      Delete
    3. I like 3:07. He tells it like it is.

      Delete
    4. That's alright, 3:07. You don't have to be here if you don't want to. I just want you to know that you and I, we're still totally cool, OK? You just do what you have to do.

      Delete
    5. lol breast milk

      Delete
    6. I like 3:48. He tells it like it is.

      Delete
  52. I like 4:22. He tells it like it is

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. learn to reply in a thread you dipshit

      Delete
    2. I like 9:01. He tells it like it is

      Delete
  53. There are plenty of reasons to criticise repetition of tired gags, but double standards isn't one of them. Sitting around talking shit for the fun of it is a different situation to putting shit up on a pedestal and profiting from everybody cumming on it. The funny guy down at the local pub doesn't have the makings of a successful stand-up comedian, but you don't expect him to as long as he keeps it to the pub.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Toats agree'n'shit

      Delete
    2. No-one likes the 'funny' guy at the local pub. He is a lonely, annoying dick.

      Delete
    3. Yeah, man. You sit quietly in the corner enumerating your online friends. That'll show him!

      Delete
    4. dot tumblr dot com.

      Delete
  54. threading is stupid, 9:01. i want to know what i haven't read yet. i know what i've already read.

    captcha: eatteal. The Windows 95 project leader had an odd fetish which was to have an unexpected impact on the computing world.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. YOU'RE STUPID, STUPID

      Delete
    2. The lack of threading was an accident. But yes, threading is stupid, when there is no easy way to tell which threads have new replies. I thread only out of pity for the blot clots in 9:01's brain.

      Delete
    3. Well, it's either threading and not knowing which thread has replies, or not threading and not knowing what each post is responding to.

      So to sum things up: YOU'RE STUPID, STUPID.

      Delete
    4. if everyone wasn't fucking 'anonymous' then people could just address replies to the people they're replying to. maybe they could quote them except clearly on here no one can be arsed with stuff like that, but in theory. but yeah. it's all stupid & it's all annoying & yet here we all are

      Delete
    5. Why did 9:01 tell me to learn to reply in a thread? Because it was obvious, even though I did not thread, which post I was responding to. Knowing which thread someone is responding to is really not that difficult. If it were difficult, 9:01 wouldn't have known that I was replying to the thread.

      Yes, scrolling through the entire comments section isn't that difficult either, but it does take up a lot of time. Okay, since I'm on this site, it's obvious I have a lot of time, but that doesn't mean I should have to waste any more than I already am wasting.

      captcha: madidnty. 2:19's pretty mad, i'n't he?

      Delete
    6. how appropriate that today's xkcd is about the difficulty of communicating effectively. at least, that's what it says it's about. it's hard to tell because it's a fucking perfect storm of impenetrable stupidity and 'omg my favourite characters don't you just love them squee' idiot-bait.

      apparently, mr munroe lives in a world where if you say to someone 'careful, there's a hole in the ground' and they don't go 'oh ok' and keep an eye out, but instead go 'derp derp derp' and promptly fall into it, that's your fault & not theirs. it's incredibly stupid but yet - if only he would think about that idea in relation to his own work...

      Delete
    7. weaselsoup, Lushie?

      Delete
    8. what does that mean please

      captcha: culingu. clearly mr munroe's obsession has permeated even the captcha system

      Delete
    9. I was wondering whether you were a regular on a particular board. It seems not.

      (The memory kinda lingers.)

      Delete
  55. Wait until late at night.

    Turn off your lights.

    Imagine yourself sitting in a cramped Soviet flat in an Eastern oblast in the early '70s.

    Open this picture of a Tembr reel-to-reel tape deck.

    Load this or this.

    Play on a loop and close your eyes.

    Low fidelity noise drowning meaningful speech? Welcome to the Internet.

    Oh, Tumblr. That's not prescient at all.

    ReplyDelete
  56. I have no idea what's going on in 1028. Which is odd, because it's apparently supposed to be pointing out how frustrating it can be to deal with poor communication.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Could someone please translate each panel in 1028 into English, American, Latin, Spanish, French, German, or Russian? I don't understand a fucking word of it. Is this one of those Science things where you draw one image and it can only possibly have one meaning in the Aspie mind? Or is Randall actually going out of his way to administer a generous dose of self-deprecation, illustrating that choice of words matters and stupid stick figure drawings are no substitute?

    Also, Randall, you are wasting the best years of your life drawing a couple of elementary stick figure comic strips a week, pandering to a hoard of mediocre outcasts who are crying to belong to something special while not knowing how to socialise and entertain themselves as peers. You also have debilitating lactophilia and your girlfriend is dying of cancer, a fact you milk while simultaneously drawing White Knight strips which might as well be A3 posters exclaiming, "WOMEN: MY GIRLFRIEND WILL DIE SOON AND I AM GOING TO BE SINGLE!" You're heading for a bout of depression and possibly suicide when you realise how shit and meaningless your work is. I hate your work but I don't hate you, because you're a fallible human like me. Get out while you still can.

    Since I think it's supposed to be my fault if I'm not clear enough about the message I convey to you, I thought I'd try my very best not to mince my words.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Another AnonymousMarch 12, 2012 at 1:19 PM

      I'm an Aspie, and I have no idea what 1028 is supposed to mean.

      Delete
  58. I think that in 1028, thinks in bubbles, like white hat guy in panel 2 are "things people is trying to say", whereas things in clouds are "things the other guy understand".

    So in the first panel, WhiteHatGuy sees a hole in the ground, and thinks "hole = danger!", so he goes to panel 2, and says to RandomGuy1 "hole = danger !", but RandomGuy1 seems to understand something different.

    So WhiteHatGuy goes on his way, thinking that RandomGuy1 was just too dumb to understand, while RandomGuy1 wonders what the hell was that all about.

    5th panel, WhiteHatGuy meets MilkyMegan, which tells him "hole = danger", but apparently mentioning another hole. While WhatHatGuy seems to be complaining about the previous dumb person. 6th panel, they both goes their own way, not having understood what the other was trying to say.

    Second line is basically RandomGuy1 and MilkyMegan crossing paths, and understanding each other, but since neither of them understood what WhiteHatGuy was trying to say, they're unaware of the danger, and fell in the hole. WhiteHatGuy also falls in the hole MilkyMegan was trying to warn him about.

    Third line is BeretGuy, aka FrenchThusSmartGuy, which also finds a hole, try to warn RandomGuy2, sees that the person doesn't understand, and decides to take him to the hole to show him. Thus both of them are aware of the danger.

    I guess this is supposed to be a huge metaphysical reflexion on communication and shit, but i actually don't see the point at all. Also, the alt-text is just basic smugness from Randy.


    What i do like about the alt-text though, is that Randy seems to imply that he is not confused about how communication works, and thus is good at communicating. While this fucking piece of shit comic proves totally otherwise, since it took me ages to even try to makes some fucking sense out of his dumb drawing, at a point i actually though people were dancing.


    I haven't read the forums, so i have no idea whether there is a consensus about the meaning of the comic, but this seems like a legit interpretation to me.

    ReplyDelete
  59. 7:12, thanks for making the effort with that - I think you're right in what Randall intended but the whole plot still seems *dons shades* full of holes.

    Arrangement of people:

    left-hand-hole rect-hat-guy(L) frizzy-hair-guy Megan(R) right-hand-hole beret-guy(R) bald-guy

    where (L) represents early left-hand-hole awareness and (R) represents early right-hand-hole awareness, and the world is 2D, so

    So:

    (1) These holes have magically appeared to trap frizzy-hair-guy;

    (2) rect-hat-guy is moving right and warns frizzy-hair-guy, who doesn't understand. He then moves further right but doesn't warn Megan, instead talking about frizzy-hair-guy;

    (3) frizzy-hair-guy then moves right, meets Megan, and moves left with her, but not before getting a haircut and becoming bald-guy;

    (4) beret-guy moves right and tries to warn bald-guy, who I can only assume to not be the hair-having-been-cut (where are Latin parst participles when you need them?) frizzy-hair-guy but a different bald-guy;

    (5) even though bald-guy doesn't understand the gestures of being beckoned and being held by the hand, he still ends up walking in the right direction;

    (6) the hole which I'd expect to have rect-hat-guy in it is empty - unless this is a third fucking hole, in which case why two lines of continuity and then no attempt to integrate?

    (7) Anyway, if Megan noticed the right-hand-hole, why did she miss the left-hand-hole? And why did rect-hat-guy notice it? Why did rect-hat-guy only notice the left-hand-hole? If the problem is that the holes are hard to see, surely it is speech/body language which enables one to point out the danger, and the very solution presented (show the guy to the hole) is the weakest possible.

    I am not reading everything I just typed so I hope it's all consistent and sensible.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. concur with (7). randy has created a world of retards who grasp neither verbal nor non-verbal communication. you don't take a Downs sufferer to a cliff edge in the hope they will both notice the danger and avoid it. instead you keep them away from the cliff edge.

      from a legal pov, anyone who has ever had a duty of care to anyone understands this - if you drag someone obviously retarded toward a danger, you're assuming the "reasonable person" duty of care regardless of your professional status. if they fell, you would be liable because the outcome is reasonably foreseeable.

      Delete
    2. Hi, 7:12 again.

      I guess that holes are just a bad metaphor for danger.

      Also, It is my understanding that the last line is indeed an alternate universe, or at least alternate location, demonstrating what two people understanding each other would look like.

      But i still don't see the point who's being made, that we couldn't sum up in one panel, with one guy saying something, and the other guy understanding something else entirely.

      Delete
  60. XKCD forums are being more autistic than usual

    C'est la vie

    Captcha: deveta samasti

    Deveta samasti to thee too, Captchabot. May Shiva take blessing upon thee.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. From the forums:

      "My favourite xkcd.
      Maybe the second best after the "There is too much time (period)".

      I've loved xkcd comics ever since I found this website. I've been sharing the joy of knowing the site with my friends, however hardly anyone (nobody actually), understood my excitement.

      The funny thing is, that I thought my friends were not intelligent enough.

      The really funny thing is, that my communication skills are actually non-existent.

      This concludes my first post on the forum."

      He now thinks the problem is that he is not trying hard enough.

      Delete
  61. Sheesh. I'm not going to bother taking the time to figure out what, if anything, is going on in 1028.

    I'm just going to assume the whole point of it is irony/metaness, with Randy poorly communicating some story about holes, which is compounded by the terrible art being drawn at too small a scale so you can barely tell if the figure in a speech/thought bubble is wearing a hat or hair.

    There's no way Randy could have produced this and thought "I'm making my point about unclear communication in a readily understandable way." It has got to be meta.

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    1. I thought that at first too. But the alt-text is just so obtusely smug (rather than somewhat self-deprecating) that I kinda dismissed that possibility. Plus, purposely making your comic impossible to follow makes it difficult for people to catch any meta-ness you contain within it, so it just seems like being meta about poor communication wouldn't be something anybody (even Randy) would deliberately try and expect to work.

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  62. 10:11, it's not just the bubbles which are unclear about hat/hair. In the second row the guy with the hair suddenly becomes bald but is NOT the same as the bald guy in the third row.

    Randall Munroe is awful.

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    1. Where do you crazies come from? XKCD rules! There is something deeply wrong with Rob. He can't possibly be a happy productive member of society.

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    2. that's why i like him

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  63. I found the strip a little confusing to understand at first but it's really not that complicated. I made a few edits which ought to clear things up. HTH.

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    1. I hope Anon@3:07 sees this.

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  64. chris houlihan's room

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  65. -
    Anon 12:50's dick

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  66. This latest one is super confusing.

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  67. The first and last sentences sound like they're trying to make a different point, to that which exemplified between them. They seem to be saying you have to be making fun of a minority for a joke to be particularly funny and the smaller the minority is the funnier the joke. That's a pretty shitty outlook, dude. Where did you get your sense of humour, a construction yard?

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