Monday, April 16, 2012

Comics 1041-1043: Revisionism

[Before I begin, I'd like to remind everyone of our IRC channel, which is #xkcd-sucks on Foonetic and is where all the interesting people from here hang out and the only reason I still update this place. Come for the fat jokes, stay for the verbal abuse. -Ed.]


1041. I'd comment on the actual quality of this strip but when I went to open it to write this review all I could notice is DEAR GOD WHAT IS ON THAT MAN'S FACE???

1042. I always like when Randy does these "I wish I were A Softer World" comics because it really drives home why I like ASW and don't like XKCD. At least he gets the three panel format right this time (he never does) but he still manages to fuck up the pacing, mostly by being too damn verbose. He could kill the text in the first panel and just make the text read "I will never have with anyone / what I had with you / thank God" and that would work better. (Still not great, but let's be fair, nobody thinks Randy is capable of great.)

1043. What always bothers me about these comics is that I can't help the feeling that Randy genuinely believes that Google Trends are a good way to predict the future (or the state of the world as it stands right now, etc.). There are people like that out there, and Randy seems to be affiliating himself with them. Incidentally, why did he include Wordpress and Livejournal? They have no bearing on the joke, and aren't relevant to his chart, either.

183 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. does not like Jon Levi

      Delete
  2. That's what sheApril 16, 2012 at 12:56 PM

    liked this

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How dare you spell my name wrong?

      Delete
  3. reblogged this from xkcd sucks

    ReplyDelete
  4. Dicksmash McIroncockApril 16, 2012 at 1:04 PM

    liked this

    ReplyDelete
  5. Very much anonymousApril 16, 2012 at 1:11 PM

    liked this

    ReplyDelete
  6. RECURSION - it works, bitches! ("bitches" being like "niggers" in that if you like black guys / women then it's totally cool to refer to people that way)April 16, 2012 at 1:21 PM

    liked this

    ReplyDelete
  7. reblogged this from xkcd sucks and added:

    Is this a joke?

    ReplyDelete
  8. leopard leopard leopard leopard leopard leopardApril 16, 2012 at 1:29 PM

    liked this

    ReplyDelete
  9. reblogged this from XKCDSucks and added:

    I don't think it's okay.

    ReplyDelete
  10. girllookatthatbodyApril 16, 2012 at 1:42 PM

    liked this

    ReplyDelete
  11. reblogged this from XKCDSucks and added:

    no u

    ReplyDelete
  12. reblogged this from xkcd sucks and added:

    chris houlihan's room

    ReplyDelete
  13. reblogged this from xkcd sucks and added:

    chris houlihan's room

    ReplyDelete
  14. gods of circlejerkingApril 16, 2012 at 1:49 PM

    liked this

    ReplyDelete
  15. Only the first one was clever. The rest are like xkcd: tedious and predictable.

    ReplyDelete
  16. reblogged this from xkcd sucks and added:

    lol

    ReplyDelete
  17. That place has changed a lot. It used to be a platform for smart free-thinkers mastering the fine art of irony, double-entendre and play-on-words. I remember arguing in ancient greek with Marion Delgado about a citation from Xenophon and drawing marxist leninist cadavre exquis with Gamer.

    And the Megane jokes, oh, the Megane jokes...

    ReplyDelete
  18. reblogged this from xkcd sucks and added:

    leoLOAFL SUSATIANBLE LEEOOPARD CHRIS HULAHOOP'S ROOM LOOOL

    ReplyDelete
  19. Charles Augustus FortescueApril 16, 2012 at 2:16 PM

    liked this

    ReplyDelete
  20. reblogged this from xkcd sucks and added:

    THIS IS WHY TUMBLR SUCKS, PEOPLE!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Tumblr is perfect for Randall. Isn't a tumblr basically a "illustrated picto-blog" anyway?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But tumlr is only for other people's pictures that you've lifted without credit and reblogged to make yourself seem interesting, which, amazingly, is even less effort than Randall puts into his comic.

      Delete
  22. Notice how the latest SMBC is xkcd 768, but with a joke added?

    I've felt for a while now that SMBC has basically become 'xkcd, but good' and this pretty much confirms it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Welllllllll sometimes

      SMBC can still be terrible, but I think it's fair to say that it is always better than xkcd.

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    2. The new latest SMBC comic, on the other hand, is a funnier version of xkcd 765. Three apart!

      Delete
  23. Since when did it suddenly became okay to repost the same joke over and over? I don't think it's okay.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I did it to show how godawful tumblr is. Most tumblr blogs have notes like these instead of comments.

      And uhh, so many captchas. Blogger's captcha system has got worse while I've been away.

      Delete
    2. Tumblr is not a place for discussion between more than two people at a time.

      WHEN WILL YOU LEARN WHEN WILL WE ALL LEARN

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    3. Tumblr may not be. But blogging is. That's why comic 1043 annoys me so much, because it basically says that Tumblr will replace blogging.

      Twitter has the same problem. Virtually impossible to follow a conversation, unless you're in it. And yet people talk about it like it's the new Facebook, which is so wrong.

      Also we have threaded replies now. That's kinda cool.

      Delete
    4. Comic 1043 also implies that google trends are the same as life. So whatever is most popularly searched for is what everyone is doing? I'm pretty sure breathing was less popular than Kony for a while, but the people who were searching for the man didn't all suffocate.

      as much as we might like them too etc the masses are idiots

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    5. The rapid decline in searches for kony shown in this google trends graph suggests that they all might well have done.

      Delete
  24. Out of curiosity, do people tend to go to that IRC channel and defend xkcd?

    ReplyDelete
  25. I would really like it if Megan had renamed herself "Megane." But her family still didn't have her committed until she accidentally told her sister: "You know, I haven't kept in touch with Randall and now I think that's a mistake."

    Megane Lactyma Bloodwitch, Queen of the Humanities. Somewhat indifferent basket weaver. Usually non-violent.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When i took calcium tablets and drank buckets of water i found about 6 months later my nails stopped chipping. My nails are naturally ULTRA thin, they are almost see through, and they never get long. But this helped. It took 6 months to see a difference because the nail bed had to grow to the edges to see a difference.
      Also, don't be rough or handle things, working in retail, the coins and cash register- forget growing nails! The month my sister stopped working in retail her nails grew insanely.
      That's my advice

      Delete
  26. Anybody else playing the shit out of Legend Of Grimrock? I'm totally playing the shit out of Legend Of Grimrock.

    ReplyDelete
  27. reblogged your photoset: Why the fuck aren't there photos here anymore :o(

    ReplyDelete
  28. I think xkcd is the best because of its innovation: roll-over text to provide a second punchline to each strip, online forums for fans to discuss the strip or whatever else, and perhaps most of all, the real world meet-ups between fans. I am simply unaware of a single comic EVER that has inspired so many Live Action events (comic BOOKS sure, but a daily or weekly strip? No way.) Personally, I prefer continuing storyline strips (Girls With Sling Shots, Questionable Content, Legend of Bill.) But xkcd uses the internet to actually transform the way readers experience the comic: it's not just a funny or edgy strip scanned and posted. xkcd has really created something different, which is why I rank it "The Best" of the past decade.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "But xkcd uses the internet to actually transform the way readers experience the comic"

      I think you may be confusing xkcd with MS Paint Adventures.

      Delete
  29. i am drunk and it feel awful gods save me

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. See if eating some pizza and playing a Led Zeppelin album helps improve the experience.

      Delete
  30. There once was a lady from Niger who rode on the back of a tigerApril 17, 2012 at 5:59 AM

    I miss the Empire.

    I miss riding elephants and dancing at Haile Selassie's ball.

    I miss putting on my best dress and being escorted by a dark boy with a parasol to the governor's residence.

    I miss his cheeky grin, the way he would wink at me, and how we would creep into the stable together and he would lift up my dress and take me roughly...

    All operators are currently assisting others. Thanks for your patience. An operator will be with you shortly.

    ReplyDelete
  31. jon levi's oven

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  32. Why is it that Jews identify with the Holocaust? Mengele kept a house of dwarves but you don't find little people talking about the Ovitz family all the time. Faggots don't talk about their Arsewitz (excepting that son-of-an-Aspie-milker Cohen) and gypsies, well, they keep on moving.

    There are only 15 million Jews on the planet. That's, like, less than one Australia, and they're not whining endlessly about how they're one massive ex-prison-colony. Fuck, Jews, get your shit together and move on.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. However, the Australian aborigines do continue to whine endlessly about how they were culturally oppressed and had their land stolen from them and they don't want to get white man jobs and live white man lives because their great great great great great great etc. grandparents lived in a different way in tribal societies. How do those two population sizes compare?

      Delete
  33. 1041. The genius of Randall Munroe shines forth yet again. By begining with a cliché with which we're all familiar, only to have the character continue his speech in such a way as to make clear that his meaning is quite different from what one would expect, he acheives a masterly subversion.
    The "whites of their eyes" tactic is obsolete in the age of missiles and high-powered rifles, so the comic also confronts the reader with the fact that closeness has become synonymous with compassion but it was not always thus. This sort of profound commentary is what makes xkcd stand out when it chooses to engage in it.

    1042. This comic is well timed: to follow up a subversion where aggression is supplanted by compassion, he gives us a comic where things are the other way round!
    The reflection on the water's surface is also pretty while remaining consistent with Randall's minimalist art style. The fact that a star-lit sky is in the reflection but not the scene which it is a reflection of provides a point of contemplation for the reader: can we lose sight of the subtle beauty of our world when our focus is too direct?

    1043. Randall presents us with an interesting observation: it seems that blogging will shortly be superseded in popularity by the use of tumblr! His comments remind us that in the not-so-distant past blogging was an obscure medium of communication which the mainstream media did not take seriously. While the alt-text is a scathing analysis of tumblr as it is now, his cheerful delivery reassures us that if tumblr does indeed become the new way to blog it will simply mark the end of one age and the start of another.
    The inclusion of livejournal and wordpress on the graph are a nice way to demonstrate that the popularity of blogging platforms is relative, and yet tumblr is still popular!

    ReplyDelete
  34. @Mysterious anon who remembers my other name:
    Will you go out with me? If not, can I at least watch you eat through the window?

    ReplyDelete
  35. Soz, not dumb enough to fall for your IRC trap to capture and label all the envied anonymous

    ReplyDelete
  36. Hey, let's compare a political candidate's quotes on the campaign trail with a child from a child's film! That'll be funny!

    ReplyDelete
  37. It's like those websites, "X quote or Y quote", where X and Y are really disparate, but the quotes are shockingly similar.

    Except this time, the quotes are nothing alike! What a hilarious twist!

    ReplyDelete
  38. What the fuck is 1044 even supposed to mean? Is it parodying some widely distributed political pamphlet that nobody outside of USA will have seen?

    ReplyDelete
  39. I checked the forum and found this link. Really stupid basis for a comic. It's frigging Mad Magazine.

    Oddly, nobody at the forum seems to realise Charlie Bucket was chosen for being an impoverished and unassuming character, as opposed to Burns being rich and entitled. They seem to believe it's just a random alteration. I thought xkcd fans fancied themselves as being pretty smart?

    ReplyDelete
  40. also I love the IS THERE EVEN A DIFFERENCE?. way to fucking overlabour your point randy

    I AM ACCUSING RANDY OF OVERLABOURING HIS POINT

    I'M SAYING HIS POINT IS OVERLABOURED

    ReplyDelete
  41. Just when last week's "Why is this a comic" xkcdsucks was so lame, Randall comes up with 1044.
    No I've come to the conclusion that Rob ain't just fat, but can actually predict the future better than Google trends: the post actually applied to 1044, thrice.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's impossible, no one can predict the future better than Google Trends, NO ONE.

      Delete
  42. i mean obv this made no sense from the start cos I'm not american and because i think of the BOOK Charlie & the chocolate factory rather than the film versions like a philistine (jk, adaptation is often a marvellous thing, etc)

    but i don't get why it says 'like there's even a difference' when there's no possibility that anyone reading it wouldn't be able to tell the difference. is the comic trying to distract attention from that fact by bold-facedly preemptively denying it? like Ann points out, that backfires badly.

    i think I begin to see the reason behind the personality cult thing that has baffled me for so long. fans talk about 'Randall' and interpret every update as if it was made by a small child they want to encourage because, bless, he's only 3, you can't expect him not to colour outside the lines and eat his crayons, and that winds me up no end, but it's the only way to do this and not have to face up to the fact that you are a fan of something terrible. if you look at a comic like this as a comic, it's appalling and offensive in its stupidity, but if you 'love' 'Randall' then you make asinine defensive statements like 'he can draw what he wants' and scrabble for convoluted ways to make sense of it, none of which there's any evidence for. meanwhile, the kid is none the wiser, and proceeds to scribble on the walls and break all your nice things.

    tl;dr every single time you think xkcd can't get any worse, it gets worse. this one is vomit that's been left in a warm place for a week. but there has to come a nadir at some point doesn't there. i look forward to it.

    ps if all the interesting people are on your IRC wossname then why risk encouraging those of us who are just annoying to ruin it for you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. we need fresh blood to abuse occasionally

      Delete
  43. this one is kind of funny, maybe

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. While neither of them are great orators, it's depressing that passionate sincerity is mocked while Western elected leaders deliver only carefully engineered insipid lies. It's become cool for you beaten dogs to lap up whatever shit you're thrown and beg for more.

      Also most people who cheered Gadaffi's passing seemed to have the impression he a logorrheic Saddam with plastic surgery, when in fact he was an annoying reminder that Arab socialism worked and had an annoying habit of sponsoring the terrorists America didn't like rather than the ones they did. I look forward to the next American revolution to see how well insurgents are treated as shit gets real.

      And this is the only time I'll post anything heartfelt on this blog, I promise.

      Delete
    2. i think the actor was the one being mocked.

      Delete
    3. No, it's definitely Gaddafi that is being mocked.

      Has anyone ever read the Pravda version of events in Libya and Syria? It is slightly different from that of the Anglophone countries.

      Who to trust, who to trust...

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    4. i think al-jazeera is the best place to get news from

      Delete
  44. So 1044 is... a meta-parody? An anti-parody? An ironic non-satire? Fuck off, Randall.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. stop hating xkcd just because it dares to NOT FIT INTO A NEAT CATEGORY. xkcd is different, if you can't accept that go read another comic.

      AUSILLO OURSTER

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    2. stop hating xkcdsucks just because it dares to NOT FIT INTO A NEAT CATEGORY. xkcdsucks is different, if you can't accept that go read another blog.

      Delete
    3. stop hating weaselpoop just becausee it dares to NOT FIT INTO A NEAT CATEGORY. weaselpoop is different, if you can't accept that go read another commenter.

      Delete
    4. stop hating fags just because they dare to NOT FIT INTO A NEAT CATEGORY. fags are different, if you can't accept that go have sex with another gender.

      Delete
  45. from the forum: "Thanks for the link - this comic was making absolutely no sense. Now that I know it's a parody of a parody, I realize that it's not supposed to."

    fuck it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. carnival night zone, act 2

      Delete
  46. parsimonious lens

    ReplyDelete
  47. parsimonious

    p ARSE mon YOU s

    I LOVE your ass, VERY nice! AMAZING!

    ReplyDelete
  48. i hate all of the following phrases and their underlying misconceptions:

    10. IIRC;
    9. sent reeling;
    8. on tenterhooks;
    7. common sense;
    5. you missed...;
    4. the free market / meritocracy / right to ___;
    3. job done / simple as / *shudder* simples;
    2. prima facie / a priori / a posteriori;
    1. taxpayer / consumer / hard-working [nation]ish public.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Damn British anonymous

      coming over here, complaining about things

      Delete
  49. Regarding 1043, nobody is searching Google for "blog recipes " or "blog babies" or "blog baby recipes" anymore because a generic search for "baby" or "recipe" yields plenty of blog results. Tumblr doesn't necessarily show up high in the results with a simple search term (probably because Tumblr doesn't really have much in the way of text that Google can index). Hence, if you want Tumblr results you've got to add it as a specific search term. Blogs decline in Google trends popularity has more to do with Google users knowing how to search efficiently for what they want than it does with an actual decline in the popularity of traditional blogs and a rise in popularity of Tumblr.

    ReplyDelete
  50. I made a parody of 1044, so technically that's a parody of a parody of a parody. LOL RECURSION WE NEED TO GO DEEPER.

    Enjoy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I thought most of the Randall quotes seemed potentially applicable to Rob.

      Delete
  51. You state that Gary Johnson is one of the sanest politicians in the USA. While I don't necessarily disagree with the sentiment, without quantification, the only thing that the statement really says with any accuracy is that there is at least one politician that is less sane than Gary Johnson. Mathematically speaking, if 0 represents the least sane politician, G represents Gary Johnson, and 1 represents the most sane politician: 0 < G <= 1. It doesn't tell us where upon the graph he should be placed, just that it isn't at the origin.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Since you want to be an irritating Asperger-ridden pedantic fuck, at least admit the case G=[0,1] where all politicians are equally (in)sane.

      Delete
  52. I just thought I'd come here and point out that the latest xkcd sucked.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I just thought I'd come here and point out that Rob is fat.

      Delete
    2. I just thought "I just thought 'I just thought "I just thought 'I just thought "I just thought I'd come here and point out that Rob is fat" and point out that Rob is fat' and point out that Rob is fat" and point out that Rob is fat' and point out that Rob is fat" and point out that Rob is fat.

      Delete
  53. 1041. "I'd comment on the actual quality of this strip [which is what the readers of this blog expect from me but who cares]" Oh c'mon, you are not even trying anymore.

    I was indifferent about 1042, kinda boring. So whatever.

    1043. "What always bothers me about these comics is that I can't help the feeling that Randy genuinely believes that Google Trends are a good way to predict the future." Oh please, that would be silly. I just take it like 'hehe, did you notice that tumblr is on its way to become more trendy than blogs?'; doesn't really mean anything and that whole tumblr [whatever that is] vs blog -thing seems like some kind of a logical fallacy anyway.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You fucking piece of shit.

      Delete
    2. You shitting piece of fuck.

      Delete
  54. Every time a lapsed cuddlefish bites the biscuit and searches for: xkcd sucks, Randy concludes that xkcd is becoming more popular.

    1043 was his roundabout way of justifying this reasoning to the world.

    captcha: aearsoc laiddrat. The nipples formed a union and employed a rodent to guard their circumference.

    ReplyDelete
  55. *Ahem* I am forced to retract my earlier statements about Google Trends after it turns out that Hiprank singlehandedly proved that blogs are better than tumblr. Obviously this silly website is a far better tool for predicting the future than Google Trends will ever be.

    Look, you could even settle wars with this thing. Hiprank is the shit. It even says so.

    ReplyDelete
  56. From the forums:
    "It's not funny. This is the first xkcd comic I've been genuinely disappointed in. Usually xkcd sucks makes me mad, but I'm predicting I'll agree with it on this one."

    We mustn't disappoint!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yeah bit late for that maybe

      Delete
  57. The latest one... I honestly don't get it. Is he just trying to be random? Is he making a subtle jab at Mitt Romney that I'm not seeing?

    If it's the former, wow, that's dumb. It's like he's trying to be... "TOPICAL!"... but failing miserably.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's a parody of a comic by MAD.

      Randall parodied a joke.

      Delete
  58. 1045: the same as 917

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just that 917 was funny, while 1045 is WTF.

      Delete
  59. The joke in 1045 is that Randall thought he wrote something clever. Why's he always gotta be so meta?

    ReplyDelete
  60. it's revealing that he thinks other people struggle & have to work at being witty. it's sad

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know. I write like twenty hilariously witty things a day on xkcdsucks alone and I've never even put a moment's thought into what I'm writing.

      Delete
    2. xkcdsucks writing write witty what twenty thought things put on never moment's like know into I've I'm I hilariously even day and alone a

      Delete
  61. Wrote a condensed version of comic 1045 in case people don't wanna read through the wall of text:
    http://i.imgur.com/ev2X7.png

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly! That was a bad strip. Which doesn't mean some aren't good, and admitting that gives you shitloads more credibility when you're criticizing strips that actually have a poor joke.

      Delete
  62. All that was really done there was that he wrote within a second gimmick. A character limit is a writing gimmick. Reverse alphabetical order is another gimmick. The line of writing crafted withing these gimmicks, however, was of no particular interest beyond a bit of inane self-referentiality.

    The potential of a gimmick's constraints to produce amazing writing was the comic's proposal. That potential was not demonstrated. Possibly, quite probably, gimmickry is the apex of xkcd's artistic sensibility.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. wrote writing writing within within was was was these there the that that self second reverse referentiality really particular order of of of no line limit is is interest inane however he gimmicks gimmick gimmick gimmick done crafted character bit beyond another alphabetical all all all all a

      Delete
  63. Ok guys, time for your votes. Which post do you think should be used for the review of 1045? 10:32 or 12:15?

    Votes are inconsequential because Rob will just proceed to write his same old crap regardless, but don't let that discourage you. Vote with your hearts and minds. Vote for the pure pleasure of voting.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I vote for Ron Paul

      Delete
    2. I vote for Chris Houlihan

      Delete
    3. I vote for the future of our children.

      Delete
    4. I abstain because neither of them employed backward alphabetization.

      Delete
  64. Anyone else realize he did 1042 already?

    http://xkcd.com/71/

    Did anyone else realize he did it TWICE?

    http://xkcd.com/334/

    (coincidentally, I remembered the 2nd one first.)

    ReplyDelete
  65. It's great that so many of us have this intricate catalogue of a comic we dislike in our heads.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's like having a mental image of all the poisonous snakes you're likely to encounter while you're minding your own business.

      Delete
    2. It's like eating breakfast while being unable to stop thinking about that month-old milk you accidentally poured over your cereal last week.

      Delete
    3. I'm pretty amazed that seemingly every poster here knows all of our forced memes by heart. I'd suggest they have text files on their desktops for reference, but surely humanity hasn't sunk that low.

      Delete
    4. Booty, you stupid worthless fuck, there are only like three posters here.

      Delete
    5. Why would I keep a meme text file on my desktop? I keep it in my porn directory.

      Delete
    6. Since when is knowing all of our forced memes by heart okay? I don't think it's okay.

      Delete
    7. Maybe I'm the first person here to say it, but fuck you.

      Delete
  66. I am going to punch Randall in the head.

    ReplyDelete
  67. I am going to touch Randall in the heart.

    ReplyDelete
  68. I am going to touch Ravenzomg!.

    ReplyDelete
  69. Replies
    1. I'm glad to see that people are starting to realize that xkcd sucks. Also, everyone hates this blog even more http://www.whatdoestheinternetthink.net/?s=xkcdsucks

      Delete
    2. Who cares what the internet thinks. They are nazis anyway.

      http://www.whatdoestheinternetthink.net/?s=adolf+hitler

      Delete
  70. this blog is incredibly fucking gay now. kill all your selfs you worthless faggots

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have killed my self now what

      Delete
    2. Now? Just kill me, John. I don't have the courage to do it myself. I've always been a coward, can't face my responsibilities. I wanna die, but what that really means is, I wanna live. Badly. Be bold and forget about shit.

      But I can't. So, please? John.

      Delete
    3. you have no responsibilities but the tasks others have convinced you that you must do for them

      Delete
    4. guys what's going on here i heard there were some self killings or something

      Delete
  71. hey capn, someone posted your remix comic on the xkcd forum. isn't that jon levi's account? are you mad?

    http://forums.xkcd.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=22741&start=6640#p2979629

    ReplyDelete