Hello, this is Raven "I need a real career-path/date/academic-field" Zomg of Ravenzomg fame, here with a dual review of XKCDs 898 and 899 so that comic 900 can have its own special! Let's get ready to be disappointed/confused/aroused, everybody!
For ease of reference:
XKCd #898
Title: Chain of Command. Tooltip: You know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I go get and beat you with 'til ya understand who's in ruttin' command here! Haha, just fucking with you--you WISH the original was that good instead of a faulty trainwreck of logic that just stops for no apparent reason (other than that it makes Randall's life easier/punchier (and the fact that trainwrecks are generally stopped (but this is a metaphorical trainwreck as well as a pun on the expression "train of thought" that went awry, so stfu))).
XKCD#899:
Comment 1: At least Randall is admitting that this latest abortion was born of Wikipedian seeds. We've all suspected it, and here it is. The proof. But this doesn't feel remotely fulfilling. It's like having your party lose an election spectacularly, and then afterward admit to making some poor decisions. You've already been crushed by the poor show, and the post-failure admittance is little more than a cherry on top of the ruins of our democratic civilization.
{Interlude in which Raven wonders how obvious the country/political party which were lived in/voted for are}
Comment 2: #898 is nothing more than that arrogant "but really, it's scientists/engineers/mathematics/the academics (except the "Liberal" "Arts" "People" of course) who control the world, amirite or amirite?", met with a raucous round of one handed applause and cries of "Goomh, I was just telling my friend that we physics students are actually the ones who'll shape the world, but then our 5-minute break was over and we had to go back to serving customers at the Lard Grease 'n Fat Hut or Tony would've totally fired us".
{Interlude in which Raven admits to being poor/poorly employed enough to have lived a whole week off of discounted/expired baked goods}
Comment 3: #899 is nothing more than a short list of cute written references. The "graphic" element is a line and a hazy bubble. That's it.
Now, he has a bl(a)og, which is a place where words go with a few graphics. He also has a webcomic.
I want to hate #899 for being basically empty of content, largely non-sensical and not in an entertaining way, and entirely sourced by the cross product of Wikipedia and Randall's "imagination".
{Interlude in which Raven admits to thinking 899 was "okay". 898 was the arrogant/meaningless shit that is dragging the scientific academia down due to a sense of "entitlement" that is not inherited but earned by virtue of that combination of brilliance, passion, and determination that make the great scientists great.. But no, apparently by virtue of being accepted to a series of programs that accept the upper 35% of the population is enough to qualify you as "better than the filthy Plebs". It's bullshit, and if you want to actually be better than the common man, then you should actually go and prove your brilliance beyond an acceptance letter! Why don't I go do that? Well I'm not a science student -- I minored in math, and my major's in the social sciences. I have zero obligation to be a productive member of society, yessss.}
Comment 4: 899 was okay. Honestly, it's not great, but it's not awful. Passing marks! Why? Because this is the sort of lame joke you and a group of friends scribble between pages, and in a way this comic is terrifically true to the original XKCD spirit of "things from Randall's sketchbook". No, they weren't all diamonds, but this sort of crass and foolish creation (even given that it is a Wikipedian infection) is the sort of thing that is geeky and universally so.
{Interlude in which Raven admits to being awful as a geek, and awful as a human being in general}
Comment 5: Words. Fuckin' words everywhere. Going back to Comment 3, I present to you a graph of "word density" for the past 10 or so comics. Put simply, it measures how much space is taken up by words. The Y Axis is measured in "words per 10 Kpel" for you monstrous pedants. I didn't count numbers as words for some reason, which I honestly forget.
![More like WORDSKCD, amirite??](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-WfxUEMvxG30/TdGmybkdLxI/AAAAAAAAATE/ZZWo2k8C2Y4/s1600/xkcd899a.png)
{Interlude in which Raven declares the necessity of going outside and interacting with real people}
Comment 6: The peak there is the abominable comic about female role models in science. Now then, just to quickly remind you: This is a blog post. There are words. That is what a blog is about. If this were a webcomic, I'd be FAILING. We're dealing with densities even above the "Subnormality" level this past month, really.
Say then, why don't we do a comparison to two other webcomics. I was going to list several Subnormality comics, but after reading the latest and counting well over 800 words I said "fuck you, Rob", so instead I did a series from a webcomic that I believe is doing it correct:
![I'm an economist, like fuck I'm labelling the Y-axis](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-T1UvWrT_u7I/TdGm2uxMfSI/AAAAAAAAATM/XuKtKHUPqco/s1600/xkcd899b.png)
{Interlude in which Raven points out that MS Paint is an awful medium for saving image files}
Comment 7: Optipess is notable as a comic that is beautifully transcendent of culture pointedly because the wordcount is quite often "<1", or numbering in the single digits when we get asinine enough to count labels or unspoken words, and when words are used it's almost universally "efficient", in that the page is never bogged down with unnecessary text. Anyways, enough fan-writing from me, let's leave it to you fine monstrous caricatures of human beings:
Compare this with this. Tell me which one engages you more, and which one makes you simply think about closing the tab and pretending you know what I'm talking about.
{Exitlude in which Raven gestures at the graph again for emphasis}
I was gonna disagree with this but y'know graph
ReplyDeleteI would have loved to have actually seen/heard the fourth interlude.
ReplyDeleteGryffilion: It's mostly just a stream of unintelligible slurs against fat people, girls who get nose studs, and blue jays.
ReplyDelete899 was a fucking awful comic.
ReplyDelete898 also conspicuously came a few days after this article on the Onion:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.theonion.com/articles/obama-makes-it-through-another-day-of-resisting-ur,20364/
I mean. Totally a coincidence. Right.
xkcd 900: Megan attempts a drive-by conversation.
ReplyDeleteI liked 900. It had multiple jokes and they really weren't bad. Hell, the alt text isn't even bad.
ReplyDeletei hated 900 it had multiple jokes and half of them were bland and pointless while the other half were just "randumb"
ReplyDeletethe alt text was simply an expansion of the worst joke in the comic
boring/10
Yes, no, maybe?
ReplyDeleteIF THERE IS NO GOD THEN WHY ARE THERE STILL MONKEYS MORONS
ReplyDeletethere is no such word as exitlude jesus christ what is this shit
ReplyDeleteI'm a fan of 10:48's edit.
ReplyDeleteOf all possible jokes on how dumb religion is, Randall has managed to come up with the 3 least funniest.
ReplyDeleteI like the graphs, Ravenzomg.
ReplyDeletewas looking for alternatives found this one fullbc few posts are good. www.fullbc.in
ReplyDeleteSweet Chris 900 was bad.
ReplyDeleteLOL HAI GUYS I CAN GET IN ON THE RAPTURE JOKES TOO.
ReplyDeleteAlso, the forumites are currently sucking their own dicks in a religious debate.
It's 9:40AM in Brazil and I already have someone in Twitter saying, literally, that he will fall in love with Randall because of that religion comic.
ReplyDeleteSo, Randall basically united two things I hate: nerd pandering and "anti-theist" pandering. I say "anti-theist" because this is the sort of people that are not happy about not having a religion, oh no, they MUST be incredibly smug and condescending to people who do.
I suppose we can at least say one good thing about this comic: it's on time. Usually Randall would post it, say... in June. Of 2012.
As an aside, I've been both of these things once. Well, technically, I'm still a nerd, but I'm digressing already.
how the fuck is this comic "on time" mole
ReplyDeleteis there some current event that makes overtly absurd religion parodies (i use the term "parody" loosely because randy is a godawful writer) relevant
and before you ask no i do not count some nutjob raving about the rapture as a current event because i experienced that every day for four years when i strolled across my college campus
ReplyDeletethere is literally nothing noteworthy happening right now
God is made up of dark matter.
ReplyDeletePROVE ME WRONG
I'm guessing what Mole is referring to is this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2011_end_times_prediction
ReplyDeleteGOOMHR I once got more attention than I deserved for producing something of little value.
ReplyDeleteit's not even horrible, just incredibly unfunny and boring
ReplyDeletei guess randall's saving all his shittiness for #1000
GOOMHR I know what error bars are
ReplyDeleteGOOMHR I recently learnt to count to 8 too.
ReplyDeletecaptcha: pratent. The great pratender.
I think comic 900 works best as three stand-alone panels, rather than as a sequence. This continues XKCD's recent habit of providing several jokes in the hope that one will click with the reader.
ReplyDeleteFirst panel, brilliant. Should have stopped right there. Ok, brilliant is a bit extreme but I'm just comparing it to the recent drivel.
ReplyDelete+1 anon1109. I actually kind of liked the first panel. I'm mentally blocking out the fact that this is ANOTHER attempt to reference his early "golden age" in later comics. Also panels 2 through 3.
ReplyDelete"So are you worried about the Rapture?"
ReplyDelete"No, though I think Blondie had a lot of better singles"
This is a horrible review. I've said it once, I've said it twice, I've said it a hundred times - women can't write humor. Can't, just can't. It's not in their genes.
ReplyDeleteSeriously? Was this an attempt at a screenplay? A movie? A story? What? Cause it sure as hell wasn't a comedy.
The "Lard Grease 'n Fat Hut" bit was perhaps the only even minorly humorous part, but only because I imagined Rob eating the store and everything inside.
+1 12:03
ReplyDeletewomen don't have genes at all
ReplyDeleteThat's sexist, women can wear jeans if they want to!
ReplyDeleteAnd who is this Gene fellow?
I can't believe he left between 4 and 7 as 'unexplored' when 6 is the first perfect number and 6.28... is Tau.
ReplyDeleteRandall has never explored perfection, Anon1:47. He hasn't even approached it [insert joke about limits here].
ReplyDeleteI also think the 5% female presence on this blog is far too much. This place should be 100% COCK ALL THE TIME.
ReplyDeleteEveryone always assumes Ravenzomg is a chick and that Ravenzomg isn't just fucking with you. That's sexist, yo.
ReplyDeleteI wish Ravenzomg was fu- never mind.
ReplyDeleteFuck the female presents.
ReplyDeleteSince when making jokes about Cthulhu suddenly became okay?
ReplyDeleteI don't think it's okay.
899 was okay. Honestly, it's not great, but it's not awful.
ReplyDelete899 would be very likely to make the top 20 of Randall's worst comics. Definitely the top 50. It's lazy, unimaginative, and some of the jokes are among his most bewildering and lacking in creativity.
There is one thing that I hate even more than pedantic science-nerds and that is pedantic science-nerds down-talking religion.
ReplyDeletebut everything in evolution makes sense as an evolutionary development that's no coincidence God wouldn't do it like that if there was a God he would do something different ipso facto fuck off religious sheeple
ReplyDeleteGOOMHR Isaac Newton wrote over a million words on theology - way more than on science - but like me you've managed to dismiss religion in a few pithy, sophomoric sentences, thus proving your superiority.
ReplyDeleteThe greatest tragedy in mankind's entire history may be the hijacking of atheism by nerds.
ReplyDeletebesides religion, of course
ReplyDeleteNERD ATHEISM IS A RELIGION.
ReplyDeleteTop "world news" headline on reddit today:
ReplyDelete"Randal Munroe, creator of XKCD, responds to Ben Stein's comments about Dominique Strauss-Kahn"
Ummm... yeah.
4:33 how did you copy my name
ReplyDeletei had that protected
oh god no-one is safe
@Timofei Munroe couldn't have written a worse response to such an awful article.
ReplyDeleteStein: Economists don't have a history of being rapists, thus DSK is unlikely to be a rapist.
Munroe: NO ur wrong i have an example of one serial killing rapist who had an economics degree!!!!!
My personal favourite sentence from Stein's virtriol is, "This is a case about the hatred of the have-nots for the haves, and that's what it's all about." Not only because, "You're just jealous!" is the most embarrassingly poor response to an accusation of rape one could possibly make, but because DSK was to preside over the /socialist/ party and is just the sort of person who, on an organisational level, would cut people like Stein down to size.
If this were the Special Olympics, the candidates would have left the track 10m after the starting line, raided an ice cream van, attacked the vendor (Randall would say he was just trying to sniff the vendor's hair and Stein would say the vendor was trying to seduce him because she wanted his wallet), and be beating each other with ice lollies.
All this having been said (why can't every language be as succinct as Latin?), I declare myself a practicing physicist and hereby e-rape all female posters to this blog. Try to spin that one for science, Randall!
Ben Stein's very likely much smarter than you'll ever be, raphysicist, so implying he's a retard doesn't speak well for yourself.
ReplyDeletehe's just jealous
ReplyDeleteIt's true, I'm jealous of Randall and all other televangelists.
ReplyDeleteIf there's no god, how come Carl's life is so much easier than yours?
ReplyDeletecarl is an atheist so obviously his nogod is to thank/blame
ReplyDeletemaybe satan?
Being annoying is these people's version of religion.
ReplyDeleteIt's also some religious people's version of religion.
STOP BEING ANNOYIN
Did she died? :(
ReplyDeleteFirst!
ReplyDeleteImagine having sex with Randall Munroe.
ReplyDeleteJust imagine it.
Imagine the foreplay, the event itself, and the aftermath.
Imagine the conversation. Imagine the expressions.
Imagine what he might scream at orgasm. Image his face pressed up against yours.
Play it through in your mind.
Think about it. The sights; the sounds; the smells.
The punchline? This is xkcd. There was barely a joke, and this paragraph is just post-punchline dialog. Unfulfilling, huh?
901 made me laugh.
ReplyDeleteIt made me laugh in the same way that stand-up comedians make me laugh when, after a lousy joke, they admit to the audience, "Well, that didn't work."
I think 901 was good. It seemed to have a good beat to it--no post-punchline dialog (in fact, no dialog). Although, What guy mistakes a pregnancy test for a thermometer?
ReplyDeleteGOOMHR I have a foetus caught in my throat too!
ReplyDelete#897 was terrible. #898 was terrible. #899 was terrible. #900 was terrible. #901 is pretty good.
ReplyDeleteThat's about par for the course for XKCD's track record, really.
FINALLY, 901 ACTUALLY DOESN'T SUCK.
ReplyDeleteIt's not the best joke in the world, but it is actually worth a smile. More importantly, it has none of the Randall smugness, nerd point scoring, creepy fantasising (*) or waffle which we've all grown to hate. It's self-deprecating, poking fun at typical geeky clumsiness, without trying to twist the situation to imply advantage.
Thank you, Randall. I know you're reading this blog so - well done!
(*) Well, you could suggest something about putting a pee-stained pregnancy test in your mouth: since saliva does not contain HCG, the test must have already been used. Anyway, why would a single use test beep a second time? But Randall rightly remembered that he's writing a comic and doesn't have to be a pedantic ass always.
Putting a pregnancy test in your mouth like a thermometer is funny?!? It is as about as funny as a poop joke from my four year old cousin. The only good thing that can be said about XKCD 901 is that it was executed marginally better that the standard XKCD.
ReplyDeleteWhat the hell is wrong with you cuddlefish! (yes, I am talking to you anons 12:04; 10:39; 10:16; and 9:30).
"it's self-deprecating, poking fun at typical geeky clumsiness"
ReplyDeleteWhat?
Haha, LOL, pregnancy test!
ReplyDeleteMister Munroe, you are the craziest!
Where I live, we don't put thermometers in the mouth.
ReplyDelete@1:28 It isn't high quality humour, but it doesn't have all the usual reasons for an xkcd strip sucking.
ReplyDelete@1:30 Which bit of the sentence didn't you understand? It's the kind of thing an absent-minded person might do - some pregnancy tests /do/ look pretty much the same as digital thermometers - and while this is GOOMHR-pandering, it doesn't follow with any sort of "but nerds are still superior" or "a girl wouldn't do this SO GIRLS PLEASE HAVE SEX WITH ME" or any of the usual Randall crap.
The comic is simply better than average for Randall. To be a credible critic you have to acknowledge that you're attacking the art and not the artist, and that means accepting when things are being done better for once - even if they're still not great.
just what is going on in randy's life
ReplyDeleteSo because Randall does not act all desperate and pedantic for once, the comic is good all of a sudden?
ReplyDeleteI am in awe of your reasoning, Anon 2:16.
this is the one xkcd that could have benefited from more text
ReplyDeleteis there even a joke here
@2.16
ReplyDeleteMy point was that you don't have to be a nerd or a geek to confuse somethign with something else if they look similar (i'll have to take your word for that- never used either).
Therefore you attempt to find good in the comic failed. It is what it is. Just a shit non-joke.
@2:59
ReplyDelete>It isn't high quality humour, <<<
>doesn't have all the usual reasons for an xkcd strip sucking.
>The comic is simply better than average for Randall.
>still not great. <<<
hth.
This is the first xkcd to get a chuckle out of me in at least 50 strips! Kudos, Randall. Kudos.
ReplyDeleteBack to business; ALTF's condition today:
Strangely absent. That is all.
what a coincidence. she just posted!
ReplyDeleteOkay 4:08, it does not have all the "usual" reasons for a Randall Pictoblog to be sucking.
ReplyDeleteI still hope that Rob McFatty or Ravenzomg has a field-day with 901, because there is more than enough "unusual" reasons to make it a piece of horse manure.
If Ravenzomg then please to make your review more like 896 and less like 898/899. This latter has severe Trying Too Hard and Hehe: (So) Quirky.
ReplyDeleteBut 900 still needs reviewing! Heaven forbid we do another double-review.
ReplyDeleteOtherwise I'll do it, and it'll suck.
...More than otherwise, that is.
Although, 898/899 were mostly awful because I just wanted to make those two graphs, gesture at them, and leave the room. Then someone convinced me to elaborate? Elaboration is the Devil.
Captcha: lurist. In the dystopian future where sexual deviance is encouraged by the government, the word "Rapist" is rendered politically incorrect and antiquated.
At first I read that to mean Randy had been swallowing sperm (AND NOT FROM A CUP)but overall: cute comic.
ReplyDelete"Where I live, we don't put thermometers in the mouth." [2]
ReplyDeleteBecause, let's face it, that'd be anti-hygienic as hell!
But let's get back to what matters: sorry, no, this comic is not good. It has a good execution, yes, but it's still not good. The joke itself is dirty and puerile. It's just a slightly less crude version of the "rectal thermometer" joke.
Crude, still. XKCD still sucks. All's good in the world.
Also, it seems lots of comics are also jumping the "the world end in May 21st" bandwagon. Comics like Fanboys and Virtual Shackles, at least. So, yes, it seems my claim of xkcd being actually current for once makes sense.
How is someone without a mouth using a thermometer anyway? It looks like it's just impaling his face. In a world where that's acceptable, I think the fact that it's really a pregnancy test is no longer incredible.
ReplyDeleteCaptcha: Mouse. (Canadian accent) Mouse?
Remember back when we actually acknowledged funny comics and didn't hate on them just to be h8rs?
ReplyDeleteBack then was a pretty good time. This comic was entertaining, though it was hardly high-classe humourre.
Let's not overanalyze it, mkay bros?
In what way is XKCD 901 funny, 7:11?
ReplyDelete@12:04 No creepy fantasizing? I guess there's no overt creepiness in this comic, but it's pretty clear Randall has a pregnancy and/or impregnation fetish. It's probably an impregnation fetish based on 550, 901, 583, 674 and 387 (and I think I'm missing some there), although a pregnancy fetish would go hand in hand with lactation.
ReplyDeleteYes, this latest xkcd is terrible. Jokes should always be about decent things like top hats and monocles. Such gutter humor as this is a mark of lower class breeding and I shall not acknowledge it.
ReplyDeleteI chuckled at 901.
ReplyDeletePeople are complaining that it doesn't make sense that he would confuse a pregnancy test with a thermometer, or that the pregnancy test shouldn't react. But the context of the joke isn't important for this comic.
It's like complaining that it doesn't make sense that that Roadrunner can go through the painting of the tunnel, but Wile E. Coyote can't. That's the joke!
Other than the obvious "OMG, you thought it was a thermometer and really it's a pregnancy test!" (which isn't a terrible subversion of expectations, and at least he showed rather than told and refrained from PPD; what I am saying is that this really isn't all that bad), I thought the joke was that a change in body temperature IS a sign of pregnancy.
ReplyDeleteThat's not a joke, that's a little-known pedantic fact.
ReplyDeleteSo yeah, that's probably what Robdall was aiming at.
"It's like complaining that it doesn't make sense that that Roadrunner can go through the painting of the tunnel, but Wile E. Coyote can't. That's the joke!"
ReplyDeleteThat's the joke because it has a CONTEXT.
Today's comic has no context, no subtext, nothing. There's just no humour in it.
People like 901? I don't really get it. I mean, I get it because it was either a thermometer that told a guy he's pregnant, or a pregnancy test that he put in his mouth. I understand what happens in the comic. I just don't get it.
ReplyDeleteAs for 900, it's like 3 XKCD strips for the price of one! And panel one was the only one I liked, so it's downhill from there! Leaving it at just panel one, making you think he's going for a topical comic but really just making a raptor/rapture joke, would have been simple and unexpected. And hilarious. And it still was, sort of, but he kept going, and it became clear that he WAS going for a topical comic, and then it became shitty for me. Also the jokes were shitty, so that could be part of it.
Comparing xkcd to Subnormality and getting similar word densities is surprising. Perhaps its just that Subnormality's comics are mostly of a higher resolution. In fact you could decrease the word density of a comic just by scaling it up.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Jacob. I nearly laughed at pannel one but before the sound could escape my mouth i read on and it got smothered by bordem.
ReplyDeleteAlso 901 ok i guess- it didn't even make me smile though.
900 panel 1 requires the right sort of accent - rap-torr sounds nothing like rap-cha in my southern English public school ponce accent.
ReplyDeleteIf you were to leave it at that, "I said rapture," would count as PPD and have to be removed. It'd then count as a passable stick figure drawing for an American audience, and anyone who spends one third of his working week coming up with it should be proud.
Randy's creepy obsession with female biological processes continues
ReplyDeleteI don't get why people like 901. It's totally bland and unfunny. But then, I never thought Roadrunner cartoons were funny, either. Even when I was a kid, I didn't have that "Man fall down...funny" kind of sense of humor.
ReplyDelete900 was actually way, way better than 901. The first panel of 900 was funny and the second panel was also pretty funny. The last panel was pretty lame, but the alt-text that goes with the last panel was somewhat amusing. So overall 900 wasn't bad. But 901 is just awful.
The first panel of 900 kind of feels like the "so what do you think about the new Ubuntu release" "oh I'm not into Pokemon" comic from days long gone. It's still funny.
ReplyDeleteThe second panel is alright, too. I originally thought the "rabbi swears it's legit" part was PPD, but then I realized it added another dimension to his "religion" (orthodox Jew).
The third panel just drops the ball. It's not that funny, and it tries to make up for that by including a nerd reference. I really get the feeling that Randall thought of the joke in the first panel, but for some freaking reason decided he needed a longer strip (a very inconsistent feeling from him), resulting in the reduced quality as the strip goes on.
Just think! If a lady who used that test is pregnant, that must means she's LACTATING!
ReplyDeleteRight, too many joyless morons here believe themselves too sophisticated to enjoy a simple well-executed joke. It's been a mildly enjoyable couple of weeks, but I've always made a policy of not associating with chronic constipation issues. So long, suckers.
ReplyDelete@Chaos, if you don't get slapstick you don't get humor. You're like a colorblind expert trying to write a dissertation of Kandinsky's work.
IM LEAVING FOREVER GUYS
ReplyDeleteguys guy guys
ReplyDeleteguys
what if the bald guy in 901 is just a bald girl
what if the bald guy was always just a bald girl
ATTENTION MANBOONS:
ReplyDeleteThe joke isn't that the guy confused a pregnancy test with a thermometer. The joke is that the thermometer showed the guy he's pregnant. Person uses inanimate object with hilarious result is a comedy goldmine's in randy's aspie-ridden mind:
http://xkcd.com/879/
http://xkcd.com/840/
http://xkcd.com/777/
7:39 um no the joke isn't funny
ReplyDelete(anyone who disagrees with me is gay)
Yeah, like we would care 10:52
ReplyDeleteR00fles!
ReplyDelete@R I may be gay but you are wrong. If the rapture doesn't strike me down tonight, it means gayness is OK but wrongness is not, and you lose.
ReplyDeleteGod bless Science!
ok you are wrong and gay and dumb
ReplyDeletesee i am now immune to criticism. i learned this from the internet. the trick is to blanket statement anyone who will be offended or disagree with what you're saying in your original post.
youa re dumb
ReplyDeleteum only the people who disagree with me are dumb. i agree with myself so obviously i am smart
ReplyDeleteI could/should take comment lessons from you R!
ReplyDeleteYins is awesome!
Ravenzomg pixelated:
".....{Interlude in which Raven declares the necessity of going outside and interacting with real people}...."
To whom was this declaration of necessity made? Interacting with real people is not necessarily a good idea - you'll catch obesity. Especially if these real people are American/Mexican/Canadian/British/et cetera...
Robyn, I have a review in the mail for you! Post it or I will end this world!
ReplyDeleteAlso, Happy Rapture, Christians!
the bible says you can't predict the rapture
ReplyDeleteUnless you read and understand ancient Greek and some Aramaic, or at the very least, Latin, you have never read the Bible.
ReplyDeleteI do.
And I have, though I am not a Christian.
Christians, and all other Peoples of the Book, are cunts - and no mistake.
Raven I made that joke already
ReplyDeleteKEEP UP
When someone is doing something to themselves, rather than to someone or something else, most languages are content to leave it at a reflexive verb. Ancient Greek prefers to add another voice to the more mainstream Active and Passive - the Middle Voice. So where the verb used in English is reflexive, Greek would use the verb in its Middle form. If the Subject of the verb both initiates the action, and participates in its outcome the verb will be in the Middle voice. In addition to this, when there is some confusion as to whether the supposed nominative of the sentence was really taking an active or passive part in the proceedings, Greek uses the Middle Voice to blur the boundaries of precision.
ReplyDeleteThat is why Greek was used in the New Testament, as the Middle Voice was required, both to get around Voice-predictingly difficult concepts like "rising" (from the dead) or "being raised" (from the dead), AND the challenges presented by the nominative of a sentence being part of a Trinity, making it hard to tell exactly which of the three possibilities is actually carrying out, or benefiting from, the verb.
Conclusion?
Be wary of Greeks bearing scriptural gifts.
Conclusion?
ReplyDeleteALTF knows how to bitch about things. Whoop de doo da, you're so unique and quirky ALTF! Please englighten us further with your obviously over 9000 IQ points and reams of knowledge.
Oh wait, this is the internet. No1curr.
Anonymous @ 12:27 PM said:
ReplyDelete".....with your obviously over 9000 IQ points and reams of knowledge...."
The only reams I know are those measuring at least 2 Gigaångströms in length and administered, with gusto, from behind.
HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS
ReplyDeleteI fellate well indeed, though sadly an underutilised skill of late.
ReplyDeleteQuery?
Can you irrumate as well as I can fellate?
Pedestrian irrumatio is a tad boring for me.
Innit?
ALTF are you still telling your parents that study is only a backup plan in case they can't arrange a suitable marriage for you?
ReplyDeleteI am no longer in a formal educational setting. I have not been so for 4 years now.
ReplyDeleteI avoid my inevitable arranged marriage (suitable or not, it matters not. In my culture there is a hefty 'Bride Price' to be paid. What is left of my parents stand to profit.) by attaching my arse to BP's NGO and performing righteous deeds of philanthropic depravity.
BP promises to 'buy' me next year.
ALTF, you should make a stick figure comic to rival xkcd. Call it cunts.
ReplyDeleteIs B.P. a sado-masochist? Else, why would he rut with and a tolerate petty bitch such as yourself?
ReplyDelete*and tolerate a petty...
ReplyDeleteMan, familyradio.com seems to have blown a fuse. I warned Mr. Camping about this. I told him to keep quiet. I didn't want fairweather fans suddenly overloading the website of my favorite radio station just because it's had a bit of hype. What am I supposed to do on the internet now?
ReplyDeleteMost proclaimed Bible followers have many qualities and practices to make fun of, but only a small portion of them actually thought the world would end today. Talking like the world not ending today disproves Christianity is ignorant. Unless you're just trolling, in which case, carry on.
ReplyDeleteWho said anything about Christianity being disproven by the lack of rapture? Were you just itching to make that rant so badly that you had to use any excuse to bring it up?
ReplyDeleteMore like ChristiCAN'Tity, amirite???
ReplyDeleteLook everyone, that delightful Raven has reviewed an XKCD before XKCDsucks has! What joy and jubilation!
ReplyDeletemore like FAGven... or something....
ReplyDeleteMore like Christicuntitty, more like Rapen, more like Acummymous, more like spewvenile.
ReplyDeleteMy response was prompted by 5:39. I realize the jab may have been too subtle for you, but try to keep up, will you?
ReplyDelete